the pain of growing up without parents essay

Essay on Life Without Parents

Students are often asked to write an essay on Life Without Parents in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

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100 Words Essay on Life Without Parents

Introduction.

Parents are like a tree’s roots, giving us strength and stability. Without them, life can be hard. This essay will explore life without parents.

Emotional Impact

When parents are not present, children often feel alone and scared. They lack the love and comfort that parents provide. This can lead to feelings of sadness and loneliness.

Physical Needs

Parents provide food, shelter, and clothing. Without them, children may struggle to meet these basic needs. They may live in poor conditions and suffer from hunger.

Parents usually guide their children’s education. Without them, children may not get the support they need to do well in school. Their future can be affected.

Moral Guidance

Parents teach us right from wrong. Without them, children may not learn important values. This can affect their behavior and relationships.

Life without parents is challenging. Children need their love, support, and guidance to grow into healthy, happy adults. We should all appreciate our parents and the role they play in our lives.

250 Words Essay on Life Without Parents

Understanding the topic.

Life without parents is a situation no child should have to face. Parents are like a shelter, protecting us from life’s storms. They guide us, teach us, and support us. But what if this shelter is not there? What would life be like?

Without parents, life can feel empty and lonely. Parents are our first friends, our first teachers. They provide love, comfort, and security. Without them, a child might feel lost and alone. This loneliness can lead to sadness and even depression.

Learning and Growth

Parents are our first teachers. They teach us how to walk, talk, and behave. They help us understand the world. Without parents, a child might struggle to learn these basic things. They may also miss out on important lessons about values, morals, and responsibility.

Financial Stability

Parents provide for us. They work hard to make sure we have food, clothes, and a home. Without parents, a child might face financial difficulties. They may have to work at a young age, which can interfere with their education and future.

Support System

Parents are our biggest cheerleaders. They encourage us, believe in us, and help us achieve our dreams. Without parents, a child might lack this support. They may feel discouraged and give up on their dreams.

In conclusion, a life without parents is a tough journey. It’s filled with challenges and hardships. But with the right support and guidance, a child can overcome these obstacles and thrive. It’s crucial for society to step up and provide this support to children who are without parents.

500 Words Essay on Life Without Parents

Parents are like the sun that lights up our world. They guide us, protect us, and provide for our needs. But, what if we imagine a life without parents? It can be a scary thought, especially for young children who depend on their parents for everything.

Without parents, life can become very lonely. Parents are often our first friends. They are the ones we turn to when we are happy, sad, or scared. Without them, we may feel lost and alone. We may miss their love, guidance, and support. We may also feel scared and insecure, as we have no one to rely on.

Parents not only give emotional support but also provide for our physical needs. They work hard to earn money to buy food, clothes, and other things we need. They also take care of our health, taking us to the doctor when we are sick. Without parents, we may struggle to meet these basic needs.

Education and Future

Parents play a crucial role in our education and future. They help us with our homework, encourage us to study, and support our dreams. Without them, our education may suffer. We may also struggle to plan for our future, as we lack their guidance and support.

Learning Values

Parents teach us important values like honesty, kindness, and respect. They set an example for us to follow. Without parents, we may struggle to learn these values. We may also lack a role model to look up to.

In conclusion, life without parents can be very challenging. We may face many difficulties, from emotional loneliness to struggling with basic needs. We may also miss their guidance in our education and future. Despite these challenges, it’s important to remember that there are other people in our lives who can support us, like relatives, friends, and teachers. They can help fill the gap left by our parents. Still, the role of parents in our lives is unique and irreplaceable. They love us unconditionally and support us in every aspect of our lives. Life without them is unimaginable. Therefore, we should always appreciate and cherish our parents while we have them.

This essay is not meant to make you scared or sad. Instead, it’s a reminder of how important parents are in our lives. So, let’s take a moment to thank our parents for all they do for us. Let’s show them our love and gratitude every day. After all, parents are the biggest blessing in our lives.

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Home — Essay Samples — Life — Single Parenting — My Mom Is a Single Parent: Personal Experience

My Mom is a Single Parent: Personal Experience

• Categories: Mother Single Parenting

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Are Children Raised With Absent Fathers Worse Off?

Subscribe to the center for economic security and opportunity newsletter, isabel v. sawhill isabel v. sawhill senior fellow emeritus - economic studies , center for economic security and opportunity @isawhill.

July 15, 2014

Children raised by single mothers are more likely to fare worse on a number of dimensions, including their school achievement, their social and emotional development, their health and their success in the labor market. They are at greater risk of parental abuse and neglect (especially from live-in boyfriends who are not their biological fathers), more likely to become teen parents and less likely to graduate from high school or college. [i]   Not all children raised in single parent families suffer these adverse outcomes; it is simply that the risks are greater for them.

Why are the children of divorced or unwed parents at greater risk of experiencing poor outcomes? There are a number of possibilities.

One possibility is that children in two parent families do better because of the increased resources available to them. Single parents only have one income coming into the house. On top of that, single parents often have to spend a greater proportion of their income on child care because they do not have a co-parent to stay home with the child while they work. Even beyond having more income, two parents also have more time to spend with the child. A recent  study  by Richard Reeves and Kimberly Howard finds that parenting skills vary across demographic groups and that forty-four percent of single mothers fall into the weakest category and only 3 percent in the strongest category.

The weak parenting skills found among single parents in the study may be related not only to the lack of a second parent, but to a lack of income and education as well. Education, in particular, stands out as the most critical factor in explaining poor parenting. But it is not clear that we should look at these variables in isolation from one another. In real life, compared to married parents, single parents tend to be poorer (because there is not a second earner in the family) and less well-educated (in part because early childbearing interrupts or discourages education), and this is what matters for their children. 

Another possibility is that children born to unmarried mothers face more instability in family structure and that this instability results in worse outcomes for the child. In recent years, the focus of social science research has been less on the absence of a father and more on how family instability affects children. In fact, stable single-parent families in which a child does not experience the constant comings and goings of new boyfriends (or girlfriends) or the addition of new half siblings have begun to look like a better environment than “musical” parenthood. [ii]

Lastly, any discussion of the impacts of single parenthood must take into account selection effects. Single parents may be more likely to have other traits (unrelated to their marital status) that cause their children to have worse outcomes than children raised in two-parent homes. It may not be the divorce or unwed birth that causes the problem but instead the underlying personal attributes, mental health or competencies that produce both a broken family and worse outcomes for the child.

Children who end up in a single parent family as the result of the death of one parent do not have the same poor outcomes as children raised by single parents due to a divorce or out of wedlock birth. This may be because death, unlike divorce or out-of-wedlock childbearing, is more likely to be a random event, not connected to the attributes or temperaments of the parents. The lesser disadvantages for children ending up in a single parent family as the result of the death of one parent may reflect this fact and point to the importance of taking unobserved attributes, temperaments or behaviors into account when talking about the consequences of single parenthood for children.

[i]  McLanahan and Sandefur,  Growing up with a Single Parent ; Jane Waldfogel, Terry-Ann Craigie, and Jeanne Brooks-Gunn. “Fragile families and child wellbeing.” The Future of children  (2010), p. 87.

[ii]  Waldfogel, Craigie, and Brooks-Gunn, “Fragile families and child wellbeing.”

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Life Without Parents Essay | Growing up Without Parents – 1047 Words

Table of Contents

Essay on Growing Up Without Parents

Introduction.

Growing up without parents is a challenging and often heart-wrenching experience that many individuals have to face. Whether due to circumstances like death, abandonment, or other unfortunate events, the absence of parents during crucial formative years can significantly impact a person’s life. However, it is important to acknowledge the resilience and strength that individuals develop in such circumstances. This essay will explore the difficulties faced by those who grow up without parents and highlight the remarkable resilience exhibited by many, demonstrating that even in the absence of parental guidance, love, and support, individuals can overcome obstacles, thrive, and lead fulfilling lives.

Emotional and Psychological Impact :

Growing up without parents can have profound emotional and psychological effects on children. The absence of parental figures may lead to feelings of loneliness, abandonment, and a lack of emotional support. Children may struggle to form secure attachments, which can affect their ability to trust and develop healthy relationships in the future. Additionally, the emotional void left by absent parents can manifest in low self-esteem, feelings of inadequacy, and a sense of loss or longing.

However, despite these challenges, many individuals who grow up without parents display remarkable resilience. They often learn to navigate their emotions independently, seek support from alternative sources such as extended family, friends, or mentors, and develop a strong sense of self-reliance. Over time, they become resilient individuals capable of coping with adversity and forging their own path.

Educational Challenges and Academic Achievement :

Growing up without parents can present significant educational challenges. The absence of parental guidance and involvement in a child’s education can hinder academic progress. Children may lack the necessary structure, motivation, and resources needed to succeed academically. Without parental encouragement and support, they may struggle to stay motivated, complete assignments, or access educational opportunities.

Nevertheless, many individuals who grow up without parents demonstrate remarkable academic achievements. They often develop a strong sense of determination and self-motivation to overcome educational obstacles. Recognizing the value of education as a means to improve their circumstances, these individuals seek out opportunities for learning, engage with supportive mentors or teachers, and develop a resilience that propels them to academic success.

Financial Hardships and Independence :

Growing up without parents often means facing financial hardships. The absence of parental financial support can make it challenging for individuals to meet their basic needs and pursue higher education or career aspirations. Financial instability can lead to housing instability, limited access to resources, and a constant struggle to make ends meet.

Despite these financial challenges, many individuals who grow up without parents learn to become independent and resourceful. They develop a strong work ethic, take on responsibilities at a young age, and learn to navigate the complexities of financial management. They may seek part-time employment , apply for scholarships, or utilize community resources to support themselves. Through determination and perseverance, they develop financial independence and a resilience that enables them to create a better future for themselves.

Independence and Resilience:

Despite the difficulties, growing up without parents can foster independence and resilience in individuals. Necessity often compels them to become self-reliant at an early age, assuming responsibilities typically shouldered by parents. This experience can nurture qualities such as self-discipline, adaptability, and problem-solving skills. In the absence of parental figures, these individuals often learn to rely on themselves and develop a strong sense of personal agency.

Formation of Support Systems:

While parents play a vital role in a child’s life, growing up without them does not necessarily mean growing up alone. Many individuals who lack parental guidance find support in other relationships, such as extended family members, close friends, mentors, or even foster parents. These alternative support systems can provide guidance, stability, and emotional nourishment. The bonds formed within these relationships can help fill the void left by absent parents and contribute to a healthy and fulfilling upbringing.

Heightened Empathy and Compassion:

Experiencing the absence of parents firsthand can also cultivate empathy and compassion in individuals. Having gone through their own struggles, they may develop a deeper understanding of others’ pain and challenges. This heightened empathy can inspire them to support and advocate for those facing similar circumstances. Their personal experiences allow them to connect with others on a profound level and make a positive impact within their communities.

Overcoming Challenges and Success:

Despite the hurdles faced by those who grow up without parents, many individuals have succeeded in overcoming adversity and achieving personal and professional success. Their resilience and determination, honed through challenging circumstances, drive them to persevere and work towards their goals. With the right support systems and opportunities, they can break the cycle of hardship and forge their own path, becoming inspirations to others facing similar challenges.

Practical Challenges:

Apart from the emotional and psychological aspects, growing up without parents also presents practical challenges. These can range from financial hardships to the lack of practical skills and guidance typically provided by parents. Individuals may need to learn to navigate basic life skills, such as managing finances, household chores, and making important life decisions, without the guidance of a parent. Overcoming these practical challenges often requires resourcefulness, adaptability, and seeking support from other trusted individuals or community organizations.

Conclusion :

Growing up without parents is undoubtedly a difficult journey, laden with emotional, educational, and financial obstacles. However, the resilience exhibited by individuals who face such circumstances is nothing short of remarkable. Through their ability to overcome adversity, seek support from alternative sources, and develop independence, they demonstrate the human capacity to thrive even in the face of challenging circumstances. With the right support systems, including friends, family members, mentors, or community organizations, individuals who grow up without parents can navigate the complexities of life and achieve personal growth, resilience, and success. It is crucial for society to extend understanding, empathy, and support to those who face this journey, ensuring that they have the resources necessary to thrive and fulfill their potential. While the absence of parents can leave an indelible mark, it does not define an individual’s entire life. By celebrating the strength and resilience of those who grow up without parents, we can foster a society that recognizes and supports the triumphs of these individuals, enabling them to lead fulfilling lives and make valuable contributions to their communities. 

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The Effects of Absent Fathering on Children's Well-Being

Nearly 16 million children—about 21%—live without fathers..

Posted April 11, 2020 | Reviewed by Gary Drevitch

The absence of fathers in the lives of their children is not uncommon. David Blankenhorn (1995), author of Fatherless America , wrote, “The United States is becoming an increasingly fatherless society. A generation ago, an American child could reasonably expect to grow up with his father. Today, an American child can reasonably expect not to.”

As this phenomenon continued to spiral, the '90s was a time ripe for hundreds of studies of this trend, which has continued. According to a 2019 U.S. Census Bureau study, nearly 16 million children—about 21%—live only with single mothers, compared to 8% in 1960.

The question as to whether absent can be equated with uninvolved has been posed repeatedly over decades by researchers such as Vicky Phares at the University of South Florida and Valarie King and Paul Amato at Pennsylvania State University. It cannot. And yet a number of studies have indicated that nonresident fathers overwhelmingly tend not to engage in frequent contact with their children.

A preponderance of studies identify at least nine factors influencing a child’s well-being when they do not live with their father—frequency of contact, age and gender of the child, the father’s economic contribution to the child’s life, the quality of the father’s relationship with the child’s mother, socioeconomic variables, education , the quality of the father’s relationship with the child, and the father’s parenting style. Five additional factors I find to be widely neglected are the presence of an alternative, or surrogate, father figure such as a stepfather, variables related to family history, length of time the father has been absent from the child’s home, and the number and presence of siblings.

Back in the ’90s, Phares found signs of increased self-worth in younger children and boys of any age when visits with fathers were frequent and regular, whereas older children and girls of any age showed signs of lower self-worth when visits were more frequent. In her studies, King (1994a) found little support for the hypothesis that father visitation in and of itself has beneficial effects for child well-being, regardless of age or gender, and expressed concern that in circumstances where there exists abuses in the father-child relationship, visitation may do more harm than good.

Rather, King (1994b) pointed to numerous studies that provided evidence that the payment of child support has beneficial effects on educational achievement as well as behavioral adjustment. Several studies have found a stronger influence from economic contributions than any other factor.

Some have studied the quality of the parental relationship in moderating child behavior. One study hypothesized that a child’s contact with his or her nonresident father would decrease the child’s behavior problems when conflict between the father and mother was low, but increase behavior problems when the interparental conflict was high. Fascinatingly, although the hypothesis was supported among boys from divorced families, no support was found among girls (Amato and Rezac, 1994).

Other studies, however, resulted in positive associations of the quality of the parental relationship and child well-being with both boys and girls. For instance, Amato and Gilbreth (1999) noted “several studies have shown that contact with nonresident fathers following divorce is associated with positive outcomes among children when parents have a cooperative relationship but is associated with negative outcomes when parents have a conflicted relationship.”

Upon examining 63 studies of nonresident fathers and their children’s well-being, Amato and Gilbreth (1999) offered this critique: “Without knowing about the behaviors that transpire between fathers and children during visits, how children feel about these visits, or the context in which these visits occur, it is difficult to make predictions about the effects of contact on specific child outcomes.”

They asserted that healthy father-child relationships enhance resilience : “When children feel loved and cared for by parents, their sense of emotional security is strengthened. Emotional security, in turn, helps children cope with stress and makes them less vulnerable to anxiety and depression .”

Many researchers hypothesized that not only the quality of the relationship but the father’s parenting style held significant influence. Amato and Gilbreth (1999) suggested, “The combination of a high level of support with a moderately high level of noncoercive control reflects authoritative parenting—the parenting style most consistently associated with children’s positive development.”

The extent to which authoritative parenting may positively influence child well-being was illustrated in a study by Young, Miller, Norton, and Hill (1995), who found that “fathers’ intrinsic support—reflected in trust, encouragement, and discussing problems—was positively correlated with children’s life satisfaction, but fathers’ extrinsic support—reflected in going out to dinner, buying things, and seeing movies together—was not related to children’s life satisfaction.”

A substantial body of empirical research has examined implications of a father’s absence on a child’s well-being, indicating evidence to support the following conclusions: (1) contact with a child does not necessarily have positive benefits; (2) economic contributions to a child have positive benefits; (3) interparental cooperation has positive benefits; (4) positive emotional involvement with a child has positive benefits; and (5) an authoritative (rather than either authoritarian, permissive, or uninvolved) parenting style has positive benefits.

At the culminating of significant research back in the ’90s, a wonderful national organization took shape, committed to raising awareness of this issue and increasing the number of involved, responsible, and committed fathers in our country. That organization is the National Fatherhood Initiative, which has a host of wonderful resources available on its website.

Amato, P.R., and Gilbreth, J.G. (1999, August). Nonresident fathers and children’s well-being: A meta-analysis. Journal of Marriage and the Family , pp. 557-573.

Amato, P.R., and Rezac, S. (1994). Contact with nonresident parents, interparental conflict, and children’s behavior. Journal of Family Issues, 15 , pp. 191-207.

Blankenhorn, D. (1995). Fatherless America: Confronting our most urgent societal problem . New York: Basic Books.

King, V. (1994a, March). Nonresident father involvement and child well-being: Can dads make a difference? Journal of Family Issues, 15 (1), pp. 78-96.

King, V. (1994b, November). Variation in the consequences of nonresident father involvement for children’s well-being. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 56 , pp. 963-972.

Phares, V. (1993, December). Father absence, mother love, and other family issues that need to be questioned: Comment on Silverstein (1993). Journal of Family Psychology, 7 (3), pp. 293-300.

U.S. Census Bureau (2019, November), Table CH-1. Living Arrangements of Children Under 18 Years Old: 1960 to Present. Current Population Survey, March and Annual Social and Economic Supplements . Washington, D.C.

Young, M.H., Miller, B.C., Norton, M.C., and Hill. E.J. (1995). The effect of parental supportive behaviors on life satisfaction of adolescent offspring. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 57 , pp. 813-822.

U.S. Bureau of the Census (1960). "Persons by Family Characteristics," Tables 1 and 19. 1960 Census of Population, PC(2)-4B . Washington, D.C.

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Why losing a parent when you’re a young adult is so hard

Honorary Research Fellow, Director of Bereavement Services Counselling & Mental Health Clinic, York St John University

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John Frederick Wilson does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.

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Losing a parent is never easy . Although the grief of parentally bereaved children and adolescents is widely recognised by charities and in media, people in their twenties and thirties can be overlooked.

If you are in this cohort, you will have transitioned into adulthood, but you may not have acquired the life skills maturity brings, and may still feel very much like your parent’s child. Research shows that many in this age group experience emotional and behavioural issues after losing a parent.

Grief is the price we pay for love . The closer our attachment to the person we lose, the more intense our grief. As we get older, we gradually accept that our parents will not be around forever. If they die young when we are still young, it comes as a shock. Both men and women of any age who remain single and living with either or both parents, often display intense grief on becoming orphaned.

This article is part of Quarter Life , a series about issues affecting those of us in our 20s and 30s. From the challenges of beginning a career and taking care of our mental health, to the excitement of starting a family, adopting a pet or just making friends as an adult. The articles in this series explore the questions and bring answers as we navigate this turbulent period of life.

You may be interested in:

Should I have children? Why society’s idealisation of motherhood benefits no one

Loneliness is a major public health problem – and young people are bearing the brunt of it

What you should know about coming out as LGBTQ+ in your 20s and 30s

Part of growing up involves the parental bond weakening as attachment is transferred to a romantic relationship. We know that the grief for a lost spouse is generally worse than the death of a parent.

The move from home to university can involve losing friendships and romantic relationships as you form new ones. All of this will be harder if you know that back home, your parent is seriously ill or has suddenly died.

Setting off for university, or work away from home, shortly after the death of a parent, comes with its own struggles which requires creative resilience to cope. For example, a young woman whose father died shortly before she went to university managed her grief by writing letters to him in a journal throughout her studies.

Changing circumstances

The cost of living means that many young people live with their parents into their twenties and thirties. Their bond will still be strong and the family unit with mum and dad will be part of everyday life . Should one of them die, certainties and assumptions about support networks and family life are shattered .

Learning to live without a parent can be easier if you have made the break and have set up your own home with a partner and children to love. Though this is not always the case – I have counselled many men and women who have retained a close connection with their parents even when they’ve lived independently from them.

Your gender, role in the family and cultural background may also affect how you grieve the loss of a parent. I have also counselled newly bereaved widows whose eldest sons tried to become the protector, even at an early age. Be they child or adult, sons may postpone their grief until they feel their mother is in a better place.

Unexpressed grief can lead to emotional or even physical complications. I worked with a man in his mid-20s experiencing chronic symptoms mirroring his father’s fatal illness, despite tests which revealed no pathology.

The expectations, rights and responsibilities conferred on the firstborn child can lead to stresses and tensions within the family which exacerbate grief in all its bereaved children. In Hindu society, the oldest son is often chief mourner for each parent’s funeral, and traditionally, becomes the head of the household on his father’s death.

Read more: What is 'eldest daughter syndrome' and how can we fix it?

Lost role models

Sometimes the most trivial things can trigger grief. You’re putting up shelves, or cooking a new recipe, but there is nobody to phone home to get advice when it goes pear-shaped. It’s times like that when you want your mum or dad.

Many young women find that the most difficult experience is when they become pregnant. No parent to go with them to clinic appointments, nobody to advise and support life with a new baby, nor the ongoing child-rearing, no reassuring parent at the end of a phone. Many young mothers who had previously coped with losing their own mother, first come to bereavement counselling when they become mothers themselves.

Sometimes, the transition into adulthood and the weakening of childhood bonds is accompanied by disagreements with parents, at worst, leading to a rupture in the parent-child relationship. I have worked with many adults whose grief has been complicated by guilt at not patching up the relationship before it was too late.

Learning to cope

Each significant person in our life leaves a legacy . What did they teach us about life – purposely or by example? Which of these lessons will we take into our future? What would we do differently?

Photographs and family artefacts can help us form a continuing bond with our parents. Talking with other family members about our ambivalent relationship may heal unresolved wounds.

Whatever your age, remember that grief is an intensely personal experience, and no two people grieve the same.

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Essays About Growing Up Without A Father: Top 5 Examples

Writing essays about growing up without a father deals with sensitive issues. To help you with your paper, check out our guide including top essay samples and prompts.

Of the 18.4 million children in America, one in four grows without a father . Writing an essay on this topic can be a great way to convey your feelings and share your experiences with others. If you grew up with a father, it can be an opportunity to learn about the challenges some of your peers may face. 

Learn how to deliver your essay with key research by reading the examples below:

1. Effects of an Absent Father by Anonymous on Eduzaurus.Com

2. life without a father by alexandria, 3. how a boy[’s] life [is] affected when raised without a father by meghan bush, 4. how growing up without a father affects the child by anonymous on gradesfixer.com, 5. growing up fatherless essay by writer jill, 7 writing prompts for essays about growing up without a father, 1. the importance of having a father, 2. reasons why fathers can be absent, 3. life without a father, 4. effects of growing up without a father, 5. my dad and his illness, 6. taking on my father’s responsibilities, 7. without a father, i became….

“Without the role of a strong, loving and supportive father figure in the house, it can break a family and cause significant damage to the child mentally and cause a lap in many areas of their life.”

In this essay, the author mentions the psychological impact of not having a father at home. Repercussions include impulsiveness and anger issues. In addition, getting abandoned often makes the child jump to conclusions and blame themselves. This resentment and hostility lead to illegal substance abuse that ruins lives. The author also tells a story to explain that when the fatherless child grows up and has his children, he will not know how to be a good father because he didn’t have one.

Looking for more? Check out these essays about dads .

“I personally fall into this category and I believe that unless the other parent is deceased, there is no reason why one parent should raise a child.”

Alexandria writes down her thoughts on her mother’s lack of response when her father left their family. She says that it makes her blame herself for all the hardship they’re going through. But, despite her situation, Alexandria learns to respect her mother more, her feat inspiring her to be independent and strong as she is. She believes that no one should grow up fatherless as life is full of ups and downs, and a child will need a father figure to lean on. She advises those unfortunate like her to continue living and have faith in God.

“In life, we are given more than just luck, but an opportunity, a chance to be better and do better each and every day.”

Bush retells the story of two boys from the book “The Other Wes Moore: One Name, Two Fates” and connects it to reality through research studies. She explains that while both boys lost their fathers at a young age, Wes Moore, who lost his father to an illness, had a more challenging time accepting what happened than The Other Wes Moore, whose father was gone from the beginning. Bush also doesn’t believe Wes Moore is luckier than the other boy because they had a choice, and both decided for themselves. Instead, she believes that whoever is there to guide a child as they grow up dramatically influences their future life choices.

“This deviant behavior seems to affect females more than males… On the other hand guys growing up with no dad are more often likely to drop out of school…”

The writer delves into research to examine the impact of growing up fatherless, the common cause, and who is more affected. According to their findings, susceptibility to addictive substances, behavioral problems, and depression are some effects of this unfortunate setup. Parents’ separation is the main reason a child grows up without a dad. In the end, the author concludes that while girls are more psychologically affected by facing life without a dad, it still affects boys in other ways.

“He was never really a father to me. Even after being with him for a couple of days, he was still a complete stranger to me.”

Jill’s essay shows how her story relates to Rick Braggs’s essay. She also includes some lines from his essay to prove it. She says that she grew up knowing nothing about her father except his appearance and the bad things her family said about him. So, when she had to move in with him for a while, Jill had no idea how to act, especially when he tried his best to act like her dad. But, in the end, she lets the readers know that her dad became her best friend, and while their bond is not as strong as other father-daughter duos, she is grateful to have him back.

Here are prompts to inspire you in writing your essay:

Identify and explain to your readers why a father is vital in a home and their child’s life. Write down their roles in raising a child and include things only a father can give his kid, such as essential parenting, life lessons, and a father’s perspective on life. Looking for more? See these essays about brothers .

Use this prompt to learn and discuss the most common reasons a child loses a father. There can be many reasons a father is absent from their child’s life. These include death, childcare difficulties, medical challenges, or choosing to be an absent father for personal reasons. Discuss these reasons in your essay and make sure to include relevant examples and research data to support your reasons.

If you have a personal experience living without a father, share it with your readers if you are comfortable doing so. Relay your story of how it is living without a dad present in your life. Include his reason for absence and how it made you feel. Use this prompt to create a compelling and engaging personal essay for your readers to enjoy.

Use this prompt to discuss how the absence of a father in a home positively and negatively affects the entire family. Then, support your claims by interviewing someone who finds life easier without one parent and adding research results and statistics. For example, the father is abusive, so everyone’s life becomes happier and more peaceful when he leaves. However, losing a father due to death can be catastrophic for some families, resulting in grief and depression.

If you like to write more on this topic, check out other essay topics about family .

Not all fathers leave because they want to evade their obligations. Some just don’t have the chance to stay. This prompt is for all who have lost a father due to an illness. First, introduce your father to your readers, what his passions were, how you bonded, and things you learned from him. Next, write down the most significant change in your life since losing him and explain why. Then, advise others in the same situation on how to move forward with life.

In some cases, when you lose the presence of a parent in the household, the responsibilities can then fall on the children. For this essay, look into the father’s responsibilities and discuss how these responsibilities can burden the children if they lose a parent. If you have personal experience with this, discuss your feelings and the challenges you face. For an interesting essay, conduct interviews with those who live in a fatherless household to understand their experiences.

In this essay, discuss how the absence of a father affected children, for better or worse. Research by conducting interviews to discover the experiences of those who have lived without a father and discuss the difference between the two with your readers. Remember to ask for permission before sharing another person’s personal experience in your essay.

Do you need help with your grammar? Find out in this  Grammarly review  why it’s our top checker.

Maria Caballero is a freelance writer who has been writing since high school. She believes that to be a writer doesn't only refer to excellent syntax and semantics but also knowing how to weave words together to communicate to any reader effectively.

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When Growing Up Without a Parent Does Not Hurt: Parental Separation and the Compensatory Effect of Social Origin

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Michael Grätz, When Growing Up Without a Parent Does Not Hurt: Parental Separation and the Compensatory Effect of Social Origin, European Sociological Review , Volume 31, Issue 5, October 2015, Pages 546–557, https://doi.org/10.1093/esr/jcv057

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This article investigates how the negative impact of parental separation on children’s educational outcomes varies with social origin. In particular, I test the compensatory class hypothesis which postulates that higher class families compensate the negative effects of disadvantageous life events, such as parental separation. I apply family-fixed effects models to control for unmeasured confounding characteristics of families and use data on siblings from Germany. I do find indication of substantial negative effects of parental separation on the probability of attending the upper track in secondary school (Gymnasium) and on school grades in German and Mathematics. These negative consequences of parental separation are limited to children with low-educated parents. Children in families with highly educated parents are not negatively affected by their parents’ separation in their educational outcomes. This finding supports the compensatory class hypothesis and demonstrates that research on the consequences of parental separation has to take into account the heterogeneity of separation effects.

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Growing Up Without a Mom Changed Motherhood for Me

I never knew anything about my mother, but having a daughter of my own inspired me to find out. 

I grew up without my mother. Not only because she'd died from a brain aneurysm by the time I reached toddlerhood, but because she wasn't talked about. I had no photos, no diaries, no baby books, and no family heirlooms. I saw my maternal grandparents two times a year and my father and stepmother barely spoke of her. At times it was as if she'd never existed.

Her death ripped apart my family — my dad fighting to keep me from all memories of her — good and bad, and my grandparents making sure they didn't lose the only remaining physical connection they had of their daughter: me.

I look a lot like my mother. But I grew up thinking I looked like my dad. After all, without a single picture of her, how was I to know any different?

I can remember staring out into the night as a young child and thinking of a dozen scenarios that would bring her back into my life.

Maybe she was just really sick? Maybe she was actually a spy and in witness protection? Maybe someone had lied to my family about her dying and she was desperately trying to find her way back to us? The tales only got more elaborate and my yearning to know her only grew stronger as I aged and went through things like puberty, relationships, and college. 

It's not that I wasn't a happy child. On the contrary, actually. Aside from my father's ever-growing drinking problem and later divorce with my stepmother, I had a rather uneventful childhood. I started calling his new wife "mom" and for the most part, she became that person to me.

But something was always missing and it wasn't quite the relationship I know I would've had with my birth mother. My younger brothers and my stepmother seemed to have this cosmic bond that she and I just didn't share. It didn't matter that she was my mother in every sense of the word – loving and disciplining me like any biological parent – the physical connection wasn't there.

Learning about things like love, puberty, and how to negotiate relationships with other girls was difficult since I had trouble talking with her. I wasn't a part of her, and she wasn't a part of me. At times, that was confusing and doubt would linger.

Maybe I didn't measure up. Maybe I wasn't trying hard enough to be a good daughter, or maybe I was genetically hard-wired to not be as lovable as someone's biological child?

On December 13 two years ago, that all changed.

I gave birth to a healthy little girl. Ten tiny toes and ten tiny fingers. She was the healing salve I never knew I needed; she was a warm embrace from heaven. Her birth was my transcendence. In a matter of hours, I went from daughter without a mother, to the mother of a daughter.

For years, I had yearned for a mother-daughter bond like I saw in the lives of women around me. And finally, in the most unexpected way, I had it. 

The lessons I've learned since losing my mother have left me with a determination to be the best mother and person I can be.

I love harder. I strive everyday to live in the present, knowing all too well the time we have is fleeting. I've learned that my daughter calling out "mommy" in the dark, early morning is one of the sweetest sounds, and that going through the trials of parenting a young child can be both the most taxing and most gratifying. 

I still hurt. I still cry and I still wonder. I worry my daughter will lose me.

I even rekindled a relationship with my mother's family — grandparents, aunts, and cousins who not only look like me, but share my sense of humor and zest for life. My heart has slowly refilled. 

With them, talking about my mother isn't taboo.

They've given me photographs, diaries, and stories from her life. I've learned that not only do I look just like her, there are some traits I've definitely inherited. Some of them are obvious, like how I trip and bump into walls all day, giving my uncle an excuse to guffaw and tell me, "you're just like your mother." There are other, more subtle, ways, too, like my wanderlust, my knack for understanding Italian (which she spoke to me), and my loyalty.

I may not have known my mother for very long, but I am getting to know her now. Being a mother played a big part in that. 

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Things I learnt While Growing-Up Without Parents

30   Jan   2018 | 3 min Read

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• May 5, 2020

The pains of growing up (Interviewing my parents)

In a book called Peter Pan , Peter Pan doesn’t want to grow up because he doesn’t want to face the challenges of growing up. In this essay I will talk about pains that my parents have. The first pain of growing up is taking care of yourself; the second one is the pain of taking care of the family; and the third pain is realizing that the world is not perfect and that everyone is capable of doing the bad things.

The first pain is taking care of yourself. When you grow up and you don’t have your parents, guardians, or other people by your side to help you with your life all the time. You’re on your own when you grow up. You have to solve difficult problems when you grow older (not exactly math problems). Thinking about solving your problems might be scary if you haven’t grown up yet. But you have to learn to solve these problems because there is no Neverland where you can never grow up. That is very tough.

The second pain is taking care of your family. If you're a grown up, you have to take care of the family because it’s your responsibility. If you do something wrong or forget to do it, it could mean a lot for people depending on you. For example, if you didn’t finish your work in time, or you didn’t do your work, you wouldn’t earn money, and you can’t take care of your family. That makes life harder for a grown up.

The third pain is realizing that the world is not perfect and everyone is capable of doing bad things. Realizing that there really is no clear cut between an evil person or a good person and everyone can be both is extremely hard. For example, we learned from school that Hitler is an evil person. But in reality, everyone including ourselves can do the same things that Hitler did given the right time, right place, and right situation. So we should not be judgemental, and at same time we should not be surprised by human nature.

There are a lot of pains of growing up, but these are the top three pains that my parents have told me. It’s very hard to think about the pains of growing up. But my parents also assure me that when you grow up you will find that it is worth it. My parents told me that I just need to be prepared, and to do things to make all the pains and suffering meaningful.

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Jessica Grose

When There’s Nowhere for Your Children to Be Safe

By Jessica Grose

Opinion Writer

These mothers keep their phones on silent because their nerves are fried. Every time they hear a ring, they know it could be awful news, and their minds and bodies tense up — over and over again for years.

Their adult children have serious mental health issues or ongoing substance abuse issues or both. One woman, whose son has severe mental illness and has been showing signs of emotional dysregulation since he was a small child, said that sometimes the phone would ring and “I didn’t know if it was a nurse calling to let me know she had to give him Tylenol or if they were calling to let me know that the sheriff’s office was there and they had to pull out the Tasers. I never knew.” Another woman, whose daughter struggles with mental health issues, said, “Anytime I hear that ring in a movie or anything, I have a dramatic reaction to it.”

I heard these stories when I sat in on several support groups run by Judith Smith, a psychotherapist and the author of “Difficult: Mothering Challenging Adult Children Through Conflict and Change.” I agreed to allow these women to remain anonymous so that they could speak candidly about their children’s struggles without further risking alienation or estrangement from them. (The groups I visited are for mothers, but many fathers manage the care of their mentally ill adult children as well.)

I interviewed Smith about “Difficult” in 2022, and since then, the problems experienced by families of difficult adult children really haven’t improved.

While there was variation in these families’ histories, the women I heard from hit similar bleak notes. A common story went something like this: An adult child had severe mental illness but wasn’t medication compliant because he or she hated the side effects or suffered from anosognosia , an inability to recognize one’s own illness.

Several women reported that even if their children consented to proper treatment and allowed their parents into the process, the treatment they sought could be nearly impossible to obtain. Sometimes insurance wouldn’t cover long-term care, or the availability of care was illusory: On paper, for example, there might be 10 psychiatrists in a given state who saw schizophrenic patients. But in reality, none of them were taking new patients, or they didn’t accept Medicaid, or they practiced hundreds of miles away. The women talked of countless hours spent looking into disparate health care options and coming up empty.

Some said that their adult children experienced periods of homelessness, leading them to worry that their children would end up in the penal system for nonviolent offenses or for simply acting out in public. (Some women, though, acknowledged feeling a small measure of relief in some situations when the police became involved, because that eventually led to their children getting needed medication.)

Worst-case scenarios constantly run through their minds, because there’s almost nowhere that their kids can truly be safe. In some instances, parents had to watch their children deteriorate horribly before they could get them help they needed, because in our legal system, the bar for involuntary psychiatric commitment is dangerousness to oneself or others , though the way that is interpreted varies by jurisdiction.

Jerri Clark — whose son Calvin was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and “crashed through every crack in the system,” she said, before dying by suicide at age 23 — became an advocate for parents like her. When adult children are seriously mentally ill and won’t seek treatment on their own, she said, their families are faced with wrenching choices. “Those families are generally told, ‘Stop enabling them. You have to let them fall to rock bottom or they’ll never get any help.’” Or parents are informed, “‘We will be able to intervene if they actually hurt you.’ So, effectively, families are told to put themselves in harm’s way. Those are basically the choices that the system gives us.” One study described this dilemma as choosing “the best of the hells.”

Dr. Paul Appelbaum, the director of the division of law, ethics and psychiatry at Columbia, told me that in these situations, family members are often “aware that if they turn the child out of the house, not only is that sort of turning the risk loose on society, but they’re also increasing the risk to their child.” He said mentally ill individuals are at greater risk of being victims of violent crimes than members of the general population are.

This week, my newsroom colleague Glenn Thrush reported on the tragic death of Markus Johnson, “who suffered from bipolar disorder and schizophrenia,” in an Illinois prison. Thrush wrote, “The country’s jails and prisons have become its largest provider of inpatient mental health treatment, with 10 times as many seriously mentally ill people now held behind bars as in hospitals.” Meanwhile, the number of state hospital beds for people with severe mental illness “ reached a historic low of 36,150 ” in 2023, according to a January report from the Treatment Advocacy Center.

What can be done to help these families?

First, as The Times’s editorial board argued in 2022, we need to revisit the idea of building a community mental health system like the one envisioned by President John F. Kennedy in the 1960s. Between the ’60s and the 1990s, most of the state inpatient psychiatric hospitals closed. These hospitals were supposed to be replaced by “some 1,500 community mental health centers across the country, each of which would provide five essential services: community education, inpatient and outpatient facilities, emergency response and partial hospitalization programs,” the editorial board said. But Kennedy’s vision never materialized.

Many of the women said that supportive housing like what the community mental health centers could offer was at the top of their policy lists. It would require considerable resources, but as the editorial board wrote, the costs “would be partly offset by what police departments, jails and hospitals could save.”

Several of the women expressed worries about situations involving their children and police officers who aren’t sufficiently trained to deal with serious mental illness. “When they get a call for a mentally disturbed person, a SWAT team showed up at my house, and they don’t know how to talk to them,” said one parent. She wanted police officers to get more training and to be accompanied by counselors. Some cities, like Eugene, Ore., and Los Angeles are experimenting with sending unarmed civilian workers with mental health training to attend to people in crisis.

Dr. Appelbaum said it may be time to rethink the dangerousness standard for involuntary commitment. While he doesn’t want to see the bar return to being too low, as it often was 50 years ago , “One could imagine narrower criteria that allowed the involuntary hospitalization of someone who was clearly mentally ill” and “deteriorating and lacking the ability to recognize their situation,” he said. In essence, “a competence or capacity criterion that would be added to the presence of illness” to provide alternative grounds for hospitalization.

Something that all of the women agreed on was the need for more understanding and support from others in their lives. They said many friends and family members either backed away from them completely or gave them unhelpful or insulting advice. They felt that if their children had had physical rather than mental illnesses, that understanding would have been there. But, one woman said, “when it’s mental health or drugs, there’s always somebody who wants to tell you, ‘Just solve it.’ And there’s always an implication that you didn’t do that, you didn’t try hard enough.” She added, “We do that enough to ourselves.”

These women find great solace in one another. They take pleasure in one another’s company and in indulging in a little bit of dark humor to keep them going, even as they express frustration that their problems seem invisible to the rest of society.

At the end of one session, one woman ended with a plea for me to pass on: “The homeless that you run into in a place like New York City — it’s easy to judge them,” she said, but “those people, by and large, have mothers that care about them greatly and are worried about them and how to get them help.” When you see them, she said, think not only about how they’re suffering but also about the loving people who are suffering alongside them, worried about what they’re going to hear the next time they pick up the phone.

Jessica Grose is an Opinion writer for The Times, covering family, religion, education, culture and the way we live now.