cambridge personal statement workshop

Virtual Personal Statement Workshop

Writing your personal statement can seem daunting as a mature student.

What is Cambridge looking for? What is important to include? What is irrelevant? How can you present yourself well? The Wolfson Admissions team has read thousands of personal statements from mature students and is here to help!

The workshop will take place over Zoom. The first 45 minutes will include a presentation, an interactive exercise and a general Q&A. If you have submitted a current draft of your personal statement by 23rd September, you will also be given a 5 minute individual time slot to receive feedback from Admissions staff. 

There are limited slots available, so preference will be given to those applying in October 2021 or March 2022.

The workshop is interactive and you need to come ready to join in and share ideas, though don't worry, you don't have to read your draft to the group!

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Undergraduate personal statement dos and don’ts

Get our dos and don'ts for writing a successful personal statement for your bachelor's degree.

Brief as it may be, your personal statement makes a lasting impression: it can also be the deciding factor in securing your university place. If you’ve never written a personal statement before, it’s only natural to feel a little anxious but there’s lots of helpful information and support available to guide you through the process.

As a starting point, below is our list of personal statement dos and don’ts.  

A personal statement supports your application to study with Cambridge Education Group (CEG) on one of our undergraduate degrees validated by London South Bank University (LSBU).

You have a recommended word limit of 300-500 words and within this you have to sum up why you are best suited for our part-time, online degrees. It’s your opportunity to tell us what relevant skills, qualifications and experience demonstrate your your passion and suitability for a particular course and why you want to study it.  

Personal statements: Dos 

Do start early: Give yourself plenty of time to prepare, plan, draft and finalise your personal statement. It may take longer than you think to perfect it.  

Do your research: Familiarise yourself with the details of the course and any entry requirements. You can read  sample personal statements for reference and inspiration, but don’t copy them.  

Do make a plan: This will help you recall all of your activities, experiences, awards and achievements (some of which you may have forgotten about) and prioritise what you want to include.  

Do cover the key information: Give your reasons for wanting to study our particular course and why you’re suitable. Tell us why you like the subject and how your interest first came about.  

Do mention future aspirations: We like to know you have ambitions for the future and understand how and where our course can take you.  

Do blow your own trumpet: There’s no time for modesty in your personal statement, impress us with your skills, experience and enthusiasm – from hobbies and interests to awards and achievements.  

Do get feedback from others: Seek feedback from teachers, parents/guardians or other family members and edit your statement again and again until it says what you want it to say.  

Do keep a copy: You can reread what you’ve written before any interviews or discussions with our course advisers and tutors.   

Want to know what else you'll need to include when you apply? Check out our straightforward application process:

Personal statements: Don’ts 

Don’t rush: If you leave things until the last minute, you could find yourself in a panic, more likely to make a silly mistake or omit key information which could jeopardise your chances of success.  

Don’t try to be funny: Everyone has a different sense of humour, so your attempts at comedy may fall flat. You also don’t have many words to get across a lot of vital information and evidence.   

Don’t use clichés – It’s commonplace for applicants to use the same common phrases, such as ‘ From an early age… ’ or ‘ I’ve always loved… ’ which can make admissions tutors cringe.  

Don’t make generalised statements: You should include specific claims and give evidence to back them up without going into too much detail e.g., ‘ My ability to work well in a team was proved when I did… ’  

Don’t write about sensitive topics: Your statement should be positive and uplifting, not controversial, so leave out any personal opinions or information that could make an admissions tutor uncomfortable.  

Don’t include events from the distant past: Only include information and activities that are directly relevant to the course and your current goals, focusing on your recent experiences where possible.    

Don’t exaggerate: Giving a false impression could come back to haunt you at a later date if you’re asked for evidence of your achievements, so just be honest about who you are and what you’ve done.  

Don’t let someone else write it for you: As well-meaning as an offer of help may be, your statement should be written in your own words (not picked from a dictionary) and your authentic voice.   

Further reading

Since the process of drafting a personal statement for undergraduate and postgraduate study is fairly similar, why not check out our top tips for writing a personal statement for postgraduate study for further general guidance? 

We’re here to help 

At Cambridge Education Group (CEG), we have over 70 years of academic and training experience and our course advisers are on hand to answer any questions you may have about your chosen course or the application process. They can also run through your personal statement to give you additional feedback before you submit it.  You can call us on +44 (0) 20 7815 7500, email [email protected] , or fill in the short form below:

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12 Personal Statement FAQs and answers!

There is often a large amount of confusion surrounding how to write personal statements, especially when it comes to oxford and cambridge and other top research universities., every year, we have thousands of students ask us what qualities go into making a successful personal statement., to help, we have broken down this question into 12 of the most frequently asked questions our prospective students ask when they are trying to draft their personal statements., 1. how do i write the introduction.

Introductions are often disappointingly generic. To help you achieve more specificity and concision, the best way to write a good personal statement introduction is to complete the rest of it first. When you are getting started on the first draft, it can be overwhelming to begin at a blank page, but discussing your achievements and interests – relevant to the courses and universities you are applying to – can help you clarify what your motivation to study the subject really is. Then you can come back and explain the reasons behind your passion for Mathematics, Anglo Saxon literature or your subject of choice.

2. How many books should I talk about?

This question can be answered in various ways depending on the subject you intend to study. Clinical scientific subjects will not require many book mentions, however, Arts and Humanities personal statements for Oxbridge see a great benefit from discussing at least two books in detail, with further reading mentioned.

It’s also important to remember that academic sources shouldn’t be only limited to books. A well-rounded personal statement discusses specific theories, touches on lectures you have attended or essays and articles you have read to gain a better understanding of specific academic points rather than a general discussion. One of the biggest pitfalls students fall into when drafting Oxbridge personal statements is getting stuck waffling about general points around a subject of interest. To avoid getting stuck in general chatter, try to use only specific examples in your personal statement.

Centrally, admissions tutors want to see that you know you are getting yourself in for. Only reading a couple of books from their introductory list will therefore not tantalise them; try to follow your interests in a bit more depth and look at readings and ideas which are representative of degree level material.

3. What do I do if I have no work experience?

Referencing work experience in your personal statement is dependent on the subject you intend to study. A rule of thumb is to ask yourself whether you think an academic in the faculty you are applying to will think your work experience was relevant for the course. If you are applying to study History, for example, your two-weeks at an accounting or law firm organising files will be of little interest.

For Medicine, work experience is integral not only to the application process but will help build a strong personal statement. When applying to a vocational subject such as Medicine, where possible you should always ensure you are able to reference at least one work experience placement held. If you don’t have any work experience and your personal statement is due, make sure to arrange some and refer to this in the future tense in your personal statement when talking about your upcoming placement.

Work experience can also be useful for other more vocation-leaning subjects, such as architecture and engineering. More widely, doing work experience is extremely useful to help you begin thinking about what you might want to do with your career, and can build highly useful skills, but, unless it is relevant to the course content, it is unlikely to proffer you any credit for university admission.

4. How long should I talk about extra-curricular activities?

Leading research universities are looking for your potential to succeed on the course you are applying for. Nevertheless, two applicants who seem academically matched might be distinguished from each other by their ability to balance their time with several other things. Do include what you do outside of academia, then, but keep non-relevant activities mentioned to a minimum rather than an exhaustive list. This might mean sacrificing some of the things you do outside of your course and focus on those few things you do most often, or to the highest level. (N.B. Your reference might be able to discuss some of your extra-curricular activities too, and you don’t want to overlap this material).

What you do mention, try to link to your subject. This might be easy, as with an English literature student who has directed lots of theatre, or less easy, such as a maths applicant who plays the violin to a high level. Nevertheless, making these links convincingly can bring originality and creativity to your statement.

5. How can I tailor it for different courses?

Subjects like HSPS at Cambridge or Classical Archaeology and Ancient History at Oxford might make it tricky to tailor your statement for different courses. Oxford and Cambridge are very understanding of this, and specific guidance can usually be found on faculty websites about their expectations.

However, as a rule of thumb, focus on the areas of convergence between the courses you are applying for. If these differ in title, then avoid stating the title of the course in your statement and instead refer to the disciplinary area or focus instead. This involves: a) making sure the courses you are applying for are sufficiently similar to give you a chance of doing this, and b) doing your research on the course content and options so that you are covering the appropriate material.

This research stands even if you are applying for the same titled course everywhere. English, for example, is taught very differently at Oxford to Bristol, and focusing on an interest which does not feature in either course will result in your application being put aside.

Doing this research early can also help you to direct your reading and research to build material for your personal statement which speaks to all your choices.

6. How should I talk about my other A-level subjects?

Lots of students are told to discuss the skills they have gathered from their A Level subjects, but we caution around this; your UCAS application includes a full list of A-Level subjects studied, and your school reference will discuss your A-Level abilities. Talking about the time management or analytical skills you gained from studying history, and the logical skills you gained from physics, can therefore come across as ‘fodder’ which could have already been inferred.

You can, however, talk about how other subjects provide further insight into the course or subject you’d like to study. For example, students who have taken Classics that intend to study English Literature at university can talk about translating texts, such as the Aeneid, and how this helped gain a greater understanding of classical influence in modern English Literature. As with the whole statement, the more specific you can make this, the better.

7. How long should it be?

This is an easy one. Your personal statement should be at most, 4,000 characters or 47 lines, whichever you meet first. Although it can be shorter, we strongly recommend taking full advantage of the available space. Ideally, you want your first draft to be much longer so you can cut down and edit your personal statement to be shorter, rather than using general waffle or struggling to fill the space.

Cutting it down is usually relatively easy, but it might take an outside eye to see the ‘wood from the trees’. Any non-relevant, generic material, anything which is likely to be in many other statements, and frilly, decorative language or repetition can all be chopped down.

If you find you are struggling to reach 4,000 characters or 47 lines, you probably need to revisit the body of your personal statement and discuss more subject-specific content. You may, alternatively, need to go back to the research and reading phase of writing.

8. What formatting should I use?

The final version of your personal statement will be submitted in a digital form with no formatting options, so there is no need to worry about formatting. That means you won’t have to decide what font or colour to use and there is no need for styles such as bold or italics. If you do include these, they won’t appear in the submitted version.

Your school should already have discussed best practice for writing your personal statement but as a reminder – do not write your statement draft in the real form! As with any content that is going to be submitted digitally, you should write it in a word document first (Microsoft Office, Google Docs, Pages, etc) where you can save a copy locally to your computer (and back-up regularly). This way, you can avoid the devastating loss of your best statement draft due to an accidental refresh or the internet dropping out.

9. How many paragraphs should it be?

There is no set-in-stone rule for the number of paragraphs but generally, a well-structured personal statement will be broken up into five or six paragraphs and be easy to read. Admissions tutors will need to comprehend your statement very quickly, so structure with this in mind.

A frequently-successful structure follows this pattern: an introduction, two to three course/subject-specific main paragraphs, a penultimate paragraph detailing your extracurricular activities, and then a final summary paragraph. The final two paragraphs are sometimes pushed together to form one.

10. Will they find out if I slightly…exaggerate my talents?

Yes! Your personal statement for Oxford and Cambridge should be considered a springboard for your interview and you could and should expect to be questioned about any single detail of it. At Oxbridge Applications, every year, we have students that approach us in January who are upset that their Admissions Tutor spent 20 minutes focused on a certain author when “I only mentioned that book briefly as a side note”.

However, you DON’T need to be an expert, or even particularly knowledgeable, about a particular idea or author to mention it in your statement. If you are questioned about an aspect of an author’s work you have mentioned which you are unsure about, then be intellectually honest and say so, but try your best to have a go given what you already know about them or similar authors/ideas.

This is not only the case for authors/books mentioned, but also if you put forward a highly ambitious or critical view in your statement. If you want to argue that Marx was totally wrong, then you better be ready to defend your view in a nuanced way. The bottom line is: stay intellectually honest and err on the side of modesty; academics tend to become less rather than more sure about the ‘truth’ the further they delve into their subject matter.

11. How many teachers should check my personal statement?

Preferably, you will get your drafted personal statement checked by at last two of your teachers or guidance advisers. One should be subject-specific who can check over the content of your paragraphs and the other can be from a different department to provide feedback on grammatical accuracy and quality of the statement.

Getting guidance from second and third parties can be useful ensure you retain editorial control, and that your voice and taste runs through the statement. If you try to include everyone’s different opinion, you can quickly end up with a jumbled statement that no longer reflects on you and your communication style and strengths.

Make sure you leave plenty of time between completing your first draft and the Oxbridge personal statement deadline ensuring you have time for others to check it over and you can make changes as necessary.

12. Should I start my personal statement with a quote?

‘Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else’s opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.’ Oscar Wilde.

How much have you learned about me from reading Wilde’s words?

Quotes are used each year by applicants who end up getting offers from top universities, including Oxford and Cambridge. It’s not necessarily going to bring your application to an end. Quotes are also awarded marks in certain A Level subjects, if you have taken the time to remember them and give them a bit of context.

However, your personal statement gives admissions tutors the chance to hear your voice, and to get a sense of what you might be like as a student on their course. By definition , using a quote – i.e. someone else’s words – is not personal. It is therefore preferable to avoid using a quote unless it’s absolutely essential. Using a quote doesn’t make YOU sound more interesting.

Before you decide to use a quote, think long and hard. If you would really like to use a quote, try to make it as pithy and concise as possible, and make sure it elevates and builds on what you are saying; that it expresses something you couldn’t have otherwise expressed on your own. (Also, by ‘quote’, we are not talking about specific concepts or theories – these are absolutely fine to include.)

Driven by 20 years of research and first-hand experience in guiding thousands of applicants, our consultations provide an honest and detailed assessment with guidance on individual personal statements.

If you would like to speak to one of our oxbridge-graduate advisors about your own personal statement, contact our oxbridge advising team on  +44 (0)207499 2394 , email at [email protected] , or request a callback  to discuss your situation., explore oxbridge applications, request a callback, application resources, related content, lateral thinking & critical analysis for your interview, reapplying to oxford or cambridge: your questions answered, how will my gcses impact my university applications.

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The Best Cambridge Personal Statement Examples

A deep perusal of Cambridge personal statement examples can help you understand how to go about crafting your own finely honed statement. You can also look at college letter of intent samples, diversity essay examples – also called diversity secondary essays – or the Common App essay for inspiration.

Writing college essays is tough. Whether you need help with how to start a college essay or how to structure your college essay, reading essay samples written for Cambridge will help you navigate this intimidating process and submit a personal statement that impresses the admissions committee. Now let’s dive in!

>> Want us to help you get accepted? Schedule a free strategy call here . <<

Article Contents 8 min read

Cambridge personal statement examples, example no.1.

Working as a private tutor has changed my life dramatically. I started out because some of my peers wanted assistance with their studies, but I quickly became frustrated. Tutoring seemed like an easy way to make money. All I had to do was explain some concepts – or so I thought. When I started tutoring, I would read out a lesson or concept, then go over problems with my student until I knew they could handle that particular problem, and I would be back for the next session. However, I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something deeper to teaching a subject.

I was working with my friend Eli on math every week. What frustrated me with Eli was that, although he could grasp concepts, he was always in need of help. I realised that I wasn’t helping Eli; I was only teaching him one concept at a time. What I needed to do was teach Eli how to learn. It wasn’t enough to show him answers and equations; I had to teach him how to spark his curiosity. I had to teach him how to think, not what to think. This was the missing element in my instruction. It wasn’t enough that I should help a student grasp a difficult concept, but rather to acquire the tools he would need to grow in his curiosity and approach to studying.

Want to learn easy ways to make your college essay standout? Watch this video:

When next I taught Eli, I changed my methods. Instead of just telling Eli when to use a specific calculus formula, I started bringing in oddly shaped containers and showing him how calculus would be useful in determining their volume. Giving him physical mysteries to solve and showing him the applicability of calculus fired Eli’s imagination and engaged him far more. I was on my way to teaching Eli how to think.

Eli needed fewer sessions after that, which became my measurement of success. Strangely enough, doing my work optimally would put myself out of a job. While there will always be new students to help, the goal of a teacher or tutor should not be to keep working with one student, but to help that student move beyond the teacher and then to seek out the next growing mind to aid.

I felt like I was ready to throw my computer monitor out the window or give up entirely on coding. I was trying to learn how to programme a video game, but I was becoming frustrated with my project. Our deadline was looming, and I felt like I had taken on a bigger project than I could handle.

Fortunately, I learnt the most valuable lesson that day. My friend, Kaylee, noticed my frustration and asked, “Can I help?”. I showed her what was wrong, and she helped me move past my hurdles and smooth out my code. I shared some of my ideas, and we both went away with a better understanding of computer coding. Along with improving my own project and getting over my own frustrating hurdle, I was also able to help Kaylee. Our conversations throughout the day had me suggesting several shortcuts to tighten up her coding language, making it more efficient and precise. While I hadn’t intended to help Kaylee, our collaboration benefited her as well.

The lesson was to stay connected. We live increasingly in a virtual world, from social media to online work-from-home jobs, and it is harder than ever to maintain connections with actual human beings. This led Kaylee and me to found the “Human Programming Club,” which emphasised human interaction, along with collaboration and a team effort. The club grew to include several schools in our area, which improved the programming experience of a lot of computer science students in our city.

Your Computer Science programme emphasises these human and collaborative elements. In second year, students work on a group project “…which reflects current industrial practice.” This emphasis on working together attracted me to your programme and is the reason I am applying. The Cambridge Ring, which emphasises social, career and community, is something I would love to be a part of. This is also because I have long-term goals that I believe will be best served with this type of education.

My plan is to bring the liveliness of the Human Programming Club to our current computing technologies, both in programming environments and through the interactions we have with machines and with apps in our day-to-day lives. I want our interactions with computers to serve relationships and human society, not replace them. Most importantly, I want to bring an inclusiveness and sense of belonging to the world of programming. When we emphasised these aspects of our Human Programming Club, we saw an increase in underrepresented persons among the membership. Making marginalised persons feel more accepted in the world of coding and computer science would be amazing. You also offer positive action programmes for women and LGBTQ+ computer science students, and I find this encouraging and something I would like to support.

I believe your programme is optimal for me to work towards those goals, and I hope to hear from you – and connect – soon.

Want to learn strategies to increase your chances of getting into an Ivy League School? Check this out:

Example No.3

The sky seemed smaller when I saw the eagle pass across the sun. I immediately pulled out the nature journal I had with me. These journals have kept track of every scientific discovery I have experienced. I did a quick sketch of the bird – some extras of the wings – and wrote down my observations. I also recorded questions about the bird – mostly diet and habitat – that occurred to me while sketching. My journals, based on Kipling’s “six honest serving men” (What, Why, When, How, Where and Who), guided and augmented my insatiable curiosity. I returned from my US vacation with two full journals of sketches and questions about everything. Fascinated with how a bird’s wing works, it became an obsession at the library for weeks.

These questions gave me purpose in another favourite place of mine: the lab. I couldn’t wait to get home and get into the science labs of my school, which would provide me the opportunity to ask my questions and get answers. My teacher, Mr. Shepherd, books the lab for me after school to allow me to go deeper into research. He has helped me set up experiments in aerodynamics, lift and velocity, which would help me to understand a bird’s wing better.

I also used my shop class time to build different gliders to test. I tried one that really flapped, but it never got off the ground. Still, I learnt why it couldn’t work – the wood was too heavy for the small engines I used. That failure became as informative as a success would have been.

I love all aspects of scientific inquiry, and it is for this reason that I have applied to your Biological Sciences programme, which is both comprehensive and focused. I am particularly interested in your research projects on organisms, evolution and ecology. How do new species arise? How did we get to the species we have now? Birds’ wings didn’t come from nowhere, and I’d love to explore the past, present and future of the evolution of species. I believe your programme will allow me this opportunity.

Cambridge recommends that you follow the UCAS advice on personal statements when writing your own. While acceptance to Cambridge is based solely on academic criteria (ability and potential), your personal statement may be discussed during the interview, so it is an important aspect of your college interview prep .

When writing your personal statement, consider the following 4 points highlighted by Cambridge:

It will also be helpful to keep Cambridge’s core values and mission statement in mind and reflect those ideals in your essay.

Also remember that every essay is, to some extent, a “ why this college” essay . You should always use that as a baseline for how to write a college essay .

Mission Statement

“The mission of the University of Cambridge is to contribute to society through the pursuit of education, learning and research at the highest international levels of excellence."

Core Values

Freedom of thought and expression

Freedom from discrimination

Integrating Values

You don’t need to specifically use the exact wording Cambridge chooses, but your essays should reflect these goals. Here’s what every essay can include:

• Something to show that you think about your community and the global community, to correspond with the stated goal of contributing to society
• A focus on education and research – mentioning your curiosity or pursuit of knowledge
• Expressing yourself and telling your story to fulfil one half of the core values
• Are there any ways you represent diversity? This could be in your personal profile or experiences, but more important will be ways you might have contributed to assisting diversity, progress, or the advancement of underrepresented persons.

All Cambridge personal statements have a 4,000-character cap, which includes spaces, and must be no longer than 47 lines. Some universities might have college essay topics , but Cambridge’s personal statements are not prompt-based.

These three examples should give you a good sense of the structure, tone and content you can consider in your Cambridge personal statement.

If you still need more examples, you can get good insights from different institutions’ requirements, such as the Oxford personal statement . Columbia Medical School secondary essay examples or Brown Medical School secondary essay examples might not seem germane to your Cambridge essays, but they will still provide you with the structure and focus you need. Looking at other essay systems, such as the one that applies to the AMCAS personal statement , might also give you ideas.

Cambridge University personal statements should be no more than 4,000 characters, and this number includes spaces.

No. If you express yourself well, it doesn’t really matter if you have a shorter personal statement. Brevity is a good thing, provided you have fully communicated why you are the perfect candidate for the programme to which you are applying.

Give examples of your connection to the programme you are interested in, and remember the rule of “Show, don’t tell” when communicating this. Traits you want to show include curiosity, passion, and personal growth. You might choose to highlight some of your extracurriculars for college , too.

Anything irrelevant, which has no bearing on your goals or accomplishments, as well as anything negative. You don’t want to cast yourself in a negative light or just be perceived as a negative person. 

Stay very focused on one or two main points. You must show your greatest strengths and connect yourself to the programme. You don’t need to include everything, so just focus on one, driving point.

Start with a good “hook” sentence and use your opening paragraph to set up the rest of the essay. Keep to one theme per paragraph and link everything together with your conclusion for the perfect essay.

They will want to see creativity, curiosity, persistence, a good work ethic, a connection to the material and some sense of goals and aspirations. College admissions consulting , such as a college essay review service , can give you excellent advice on your personal statement. 

Two or three weeks, working daily on your statement, to give you the chance to not only write, but re-write, refine, edit, proofread and find someone to read and critique your paper.

Brainstorming for a few minutes will help. Take two or three minutes and a blank page and write down everything you love about your chosen subject. Free-associate, and you’ll almost definitely have something when your time is up.

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Kimberly Anderson is a PhD Candidate at the Department of Anglo-Saxon, Norse and Celtic, University of Cambridge, where she also obtained her Master of Philosophy. Her areas of expertise have allowed her to explore the very beginnings of the written word, the foundations of narrative and centuries of change to the concepts of authorship and ‘good writing’. Who better yet to walk you through the principles of good essay writing?

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Learn what it takes to make your personal statement stand out, and learn how to avoid common personal statement writing mistakes.

Use this webinar to enhance your writing for your university applications, and make the most of this opportunity for insights into university-level academic writing. This will also be an ideal opportunity to receive guidance on what admissions teams are looking for within a personal statement. Topics covered will include:

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Successful Personal Statement For Psychological and Behavioural Sciences At Cambridge

Last Updated: 6th April 2022

Author: Rob Needleman

Table of Contents

Welcome to our popular Personal Statement series where we present a successful Personal Statement, and our Oxbridge Tutors provide their feedback on it. 

Today, we are looking through a Psychological and Behavioural Sciences (PBS) applicant’s Personal Statement that helped secure a place at Cambridge University. The PBS Course at Cambridge gives you the opportunity to study cognitive, social, developmental and biological psychology within the broader context of the behavioural sciences.

Read on to see how this candidate demonstrates their interest in the behavioural sciences.   

Here’s a breakdown of the Personal Statement (the applicant uses most of the 4,000 characters available):

SUCCESSFUL?

The universities this candidate applied to were the following:

Enrolling on our Oxbridge Psychology comprehensive Programme will give you access to Personal Statement redrafts. 

Your tutor will give you actionable feedback with insider tips on how to improve and make your Personal Statement Oxbridge quality for the best chances of success.  

Psychological and Behavioural Sciences Personal Statement

”Such a shame she will not study medicine!” I heard several times as my interests finally steered into a university degree. Having grown up with my mum – a psychologist, from primary school I constantly questioned human behaviour. And although parents from small towns dream of their children becoming doctors, phenomena that I saw in my surroundings, like eating disorders or extreme shyness, relentlessly attracted my attention. I knew I needed to pursue an intense educational path to gain the depth of knowledge I desired.

My exceptional curiosity led me to follow the IBO program. Thanks to its curriculum, I relished the opportunity to extend my private research and put it into academic framework. While working independently on my Extended Essay “Should introversion be treated?” I discovered Susan Cain and her book “Quiet: The Power of Introverts”. My puzzle of introversion developed into educated distinction for introversion, social anxiety disorder and behavioural inhibitions. In addition, the EE helped me understand the role of biology, encouraging me to start an online course “Introduction to psychology” taught by the University of Toronto. My curiosity still reaches far beyond these introductions and I am looking forward to studying details of brain lobes during biological modules of the course. Moreover, since the subject of eating disorders is too sensitive to be researched in high school, I cannot wait to approach it at an academic level and discuss it with world class experts.

My in-depth, intense processing applies not only to theory, but I also appreciate the material world we live in. Hence, to step out of my comfort zone and into reality, I attended a Business Week program organised by Washington City in Gdansk. My initial function as Vice-President for a business simulation left me with a deep aspiration for a better performance. Therefore, I followed-up Business Week program with an advanced option and became the CEO of my team. Right then I started to appreciate the contribution of every member. I took real pleasure in guiding my team through the processes of marketing, pricing, R&D, production and the construction of a business plan, all of which I understood quickly and precisely thanks to analytical thinking skills I developed during a demanding Maths HL course.

My commitment and eagerness to learn may also be seen by the title of a finalist in the French Language Olympiad, meaning that I reached an advanced level in just two years. Furthermore, I participated in two exchange projects with a Provencal theatre to check my linguistic competencies with native speakers. Although both exchanges were awarded with European Language Label, what counted most was my exceptional chance to explore the French culture inside out. My other interests include French literature, contemporary dancing, horse riding and behavioural economics. The latter led me to the online course organised by the University of Queensland, Australia. The course outlined concepts from Daniel Kahneman’s “Thinking Fast and Slow”, of which planning fallacy and confirmation bias I consider of greatest importance. Moreover, thanks to good time management I constantly look for other initiatives, such as a charity campaign or volunteering in teaching English or organising TriMUN as Deputy Secretary General. During TriMUN I explained to participants how to follow all the diplomatic procedures – those activities made me wonder about different approaches I had to take in order to teach.

I no longer want psychology to remain only an interest of mine; instead, I need dependable academic tools to understand the research already done. As psychology is a relatively new field of science, early starting form Wundt in 1879, there is still space for much more to be done. I believe that a strong scientific background is crucial for building a career involving communicating with people efficiently and helping them function optimally in our complex material world.

For more inspiration, take a look through our other successful Personal Statement a nalysis articles:

Successful Personal Statement For Natural Science (Physical) At Cambridge

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Download our Free Personal Statement Starter Guide 

Good Points Of The Personal Statement

This candidate is able to identify a range of ways in which they have developed their interest in their subject area beyond the demands of their current courses of school-level study. They are also able to demonstrate that they have thought clearly and carefully about what kinds of material they might encounter at undergraduate level, and how that intersects with both their current interests and their potential areas of interest in the future. In order to have arrived at these opinions, the candidate has read a range of texts, and is able to utilise their thoughts on these texts in their statement. As such, they draw together various aspects of their academic pursuits in order to fully paint the picture of themselves as a motivated and tenacious academic student.

Bad Points Of The Personal Statement

While the candidate is generally able to express themselves clearly, there are moments where the syntax and exact choices of vocabulary seem slightly stilted, suggesting perhaps a non-native speaker or an unedited statement. This slight lapse in language skill does present areas where the communication level is affected, and therefore puts pressure on the content of the statement as a whole. The statement also relies heavily on anecdotal evidence and does include some slightly uncomfortable generalities. In addition, the candidate would benefit from perhaps adjusting the tone of their moments of personal reflection; the statement has the potential to be read in a way that suggests the writer is arrogant or pompous, and it may well be that this is solely down to word choice rather than intention.

UniAdmissions Overall Score:

★ ★ ★ ☆ ☆

Although this statement illustrates the candidate’s academic fervour, it does also show areas for potential improvement. It would have been beneficial for the statement as a whole had the candidate maintained a clear and developed level of academic prose throughout, and they could have more clearly linked some of their extra-curricular activities to their chosen course of study. In addition, while the candidate ably discusses texts that they have read in preparation for undergraduate study, these discussions could have taken prominence in the statement, over and above the inclusion of more personal or anecdotal material.

This Personal Statement for Psychology is a good example of demonstrating interest. The candidate’s passion is clearly shown which is vital to Admissions Tutors.

Remember, at Cambridge, these Admissions Tutors are often the people who will be teaching you for the next few years, so you need to appeal directly to them.

There are plenty more successful personal statements and expert guides on our Free Personal Statement Resources page.

Our expert tutors are on hand to help you craft the perfect Personal Statement for your Cambridge PBS application.

With our  Oxbridge Psychology Premium Programme, we help you craft the perfect Personal   Statement , score highly on the TSA and teach you how to  Interview effectively .

Discover our  Oxbridge Psychology Premium Programme  by clicking the button below to  enrol and triple your chances of success.

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