how do you write a father of the bride speech

How to Write a Father of the Bride Speech From Start to Finish

• Lauren is a contributor for The Knot covering topics such as music, cakes, venues and speeches.
• She has been published in a wide array of lifetsyle-oriented publications including SELF and Allure.
• Lauren is a proud graduate of Syracuse University's SI Newhouse School of Public Communication.

If you're the father of a bride-to-be, you've probably dreamed of (or dreaded!) your daughter's wedding since she was a little girl. Now that the big day is finally here, you'll be tasked with presenting a heartwarming father of the bride speech. Yes, the father of the bride is expected to give a speech—and it's usually a central moment during the wedding reception . So, bring a pack of tissues along for the emotional roller coaster ride and use our helpful father of the bride speech examples and tips to write your own tribute . Plus, we've created an easy-to-follow checklist that you can screenshot or print to make sure you've hit all the important points.

In this article:

Printable Template | How to Write | Examples | Tips | FAQs

Printable Father of the Bride Speech Template

In a pinch? Use our step-by-step father of the bride speech outline to quickly write something in just a few minutes.

How to Write a Father of the Bride Speech Step-by-Step

"This, without a doubt, is one of the most emotional speeches, so there will surely be many tears," says Fátima Falcon of Momentos Weddings and Events in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. Emotions are sure to run high on the day of your daughter's wedding, which can make it difficult to deliver a heartfelt wedding toast to your daughter and her new spouse. We've compiled expert public speaking and wedding speech tips to help you write an authentic, tear-jerker father of the bride speech that's sure to wow everyone in the crowd.

1. Start with a welcome greeting.

Begin the speech by introducing yourself as the bride's father (or father figure), including your name.

2. Thank the guests for coming.

Share a few words of gratitude for everyone who attended the wedding—you can even include a brief mention of how much you've been looking forward to this day, especially if you were part of the planning process.

3. Talk about your bond with your daughter.

Consider incorporating memorable moments from years past into your speech to paint a picture of your daughter, like examples of what makes her special and how she's evolved into the person she is today. "Use this writing opportunity to express your love for your daughter and the special bond that you share now and will always share," says wedding planner Lynne Goldberg of Ms. Wedding Planner in South Florida, New York and Las Vegas. "Let her know that even though she is starting a new life, you will always be there for her."

If you're stuck on what to mention, Falcon recommends writing about how it felt when you first found out you were having a little girl, what moments you've most enjoyed with her and the times you felt especially proud of your daughter.

4. Welcome your daughter's partner to the family.

"Make sure you include the person she has chosen to marry in your speech," Goldberg says. Falcon adds: How did you feel when your daughter first met her now-spouse? How has your affection grown for her partner over time? Address your new in-law directly and share a few words about something that's unique to your connection with them.

5. Speak about the couple's relationship.

Take a moment to talk not just about your daughter's partner, but about their relationship with each other. Mention something positive you've noticed about their partnership and congratulate them for taking this next important step. You can also share a few words of encouragement for their next chapter or your best piece of marriage advice.

6. Raise your glass for a toast.

This one's obvious, but it's just as important. Conclude your father of the bride speech by inviting all of the guests to join you in a toast to the newlyweds.

Father of the Bride Speech Examples

Before you begin writing, decide if you want your speech to be short and sweet (check out the one below if you're looking for a shy father of the bride speech example), charming and funny, or simple and to the point. Once you're ready, follow these fill-in-the-blank options.

Find your kind of venue

Simple father of the bride speech example.

"Welcome everyone. I'm [insert your name] , Danielle's dad. On behalf of her mother and I, thank you for joining us tonight. We're incredibly grateful to celebrate the beautiful marriage of Danielle and John. We raised Danielle to be kind, independent and to embrace everything that life has to offer, but we could only hope that she'd someday find her match who embodies all of that and more. John, I'm so happy to say that you're that person, and we're thrilled to welcome you into our family. I admire [insert a characteristic about her partner] most about you, and I know that you're going to be a wonderful lifelong partner for Danielle. If I had one piece of advice for both of you, it's this: 'Whenever you are wrong, admit it. Whenever you are right, shut up!' But seriously, life is too short, so do your best not to sweat the small stuff. Danielle, I'm looking forward to celebrating many more happy moments in the future for you and John. Now, I'll ask that you all join me in raising your glasses for the newlyweds. Here's to a lifetime of love."

Short Father of the Bride Speech Example

"Hello, and thank you everyone for joining us to celebrate Jennifer and Melissa. I'm [insert your name] , Jennifer's dad, and I'm so excited for her as she and Melissa take their next step in life together. When Jennifer was a little girl, one of the things I loved most about her was [share a favorite memory or characteristic from her childhood] . I could only hope that someday she'd find a partner who cares about her as much as I do, and Melissa is that person. Melissa, we are so thrilled to have you join our family, and I'm looking forward to many more years of [insert a common interest that you both share] . Cheers and congratulations to you both!"

Funny Father of the Bride Speech Example

"I've long been ridiculed by my wife, family members and now-adult children for my so-called 'awful' dad jokes, so bear with me as I try to keep those to a minimum. As the father of the bride, the pressure is on me to deliver a poignant, powerful speech. Hopefully, I live up to your expectations. If not, there's the door.

I've been picturing Alex's wedding day in my head since we first brought her home from the hospital. Honestly, I'm having trouble wrapping my head around how fast Alex has grown up. It's hard to believe I'm standing here today, in front of you all, giving this speech. When I look into my daughter's eyes, I am amazed. Instead of the little girl who'd force me to play dress-up, watch Disney movies, and host fake tea parties with her stuffed animals, I now see a beautiful bride and an all-around exceptional young woman. And although I will miss being the man you always run to for guidance, I won't miss getting the bills for your designer handbag obsession.

When Alex brought Sam home for the first time, I was terrified at the thought of her leaving the nest. And, I almost didn't want to like Sam—after all, dads aren't supposed to like their daughter's significant others (or, so I've been told by my much-older, less-wiser friends.) But as soon as Sam walked through our door and began chatting me up about the Mets, he nearly swept me off my feet just as they did with Alex. Over time, our casual conversations evolved and our bond became much stronger. She loved Sam, and I did, too.

Sam, you make the perfect addition to our family, and I'm so excited to call you my new [son/daughter/child]. I wish you both a lifetime of happiness. Now that I'm all puffy-eyed, please join me in toasting to this incredible couple before we get back to the dance floor!"

Father of the Bride Speech Tips

Now that we've shared the basics, the next step is to start writing your own father of the bride speech. Here are a few final tips to make note of (and the wedding speech mistakes to avoid ).

Kick it off with an anecdote or heartfelt comment.

Figuring out how to start a father of the bride speech can feel like a lot of pressure—you want to capture guests' attention from the start without seeming like you're trying too hard. Once you've introduced yourself, sharing a short anecdote about your daughter or a touching comment about how proud she's made you are two father of the bride speech icebreakers. Whether you mention a funny wedding planning moment that happened leading up to the day, or you share a fond childhood memory that captures her personality, guests will love the personal touch. Not only will this give them a glimpse of your daughter's character, but it will double-down on just how special your relationship is.

Avoid sensitive or embarrassing comments.

Err on the side of caution by avoiding any embarrassing—or potentially awkward— memories, moments or mishaps that could make your daughter, her new spouse or wedding guests feel uncomfortable. This includes past relationships/breakups, mentions of future grandchildren and any other topics that are private or personal.

You'll also want to avoid jokes related to your bank account. "You may have spent a ton on this event, but joking about your now empty bank account will only make people feel awkward," says Katelyn Peterson of Wedding Words , a wedding vow and speech writing service. And while you're at it, steer clear of cliches as well. "We've all heard the line about how you're not losing a daughter, you're gaining a son," Peterson says. "Instead, express how you feel about your new son-in-law or daughter-in-law in your own words."

Conclude with a short and sweet message.

When it comes time to end your speech, think short, sweet and sentimental. "When the father of the bride inspires guests to wipe a tear away, that's when you know you've hit speech writing gold," says Peterson. Alternatively, end with a toast to the couple followed by a "wish for their future together," says Parks.

Father of the Bride Speech Frequently Asked Questions

Are you new to writing father of the bride speeches? No problem. Here's what's expected when it comes to timing and who you should thank once you take the mic.

How long should a father of the bride speech be?

A father of the bride speech can be about three minutes on the short side, and up to 10 minutes long for a more in-depth speech.

According to Falcon, the best father of the bride speeches last around six minutes. She continues, "The tone should be more formal at the beginning and, as the minutes go by, more emotional." But, beware: "Anything over 10 minutes will lose the attention of the guests," advises Joanna Kwok of Honour and Blessing Events in Vancouver, Canada.

When does the father of the bride give a speech?

The father of the bride can expect to make the speech at the start of the wedding reception, "just before dinner is served," says Peterson.

Alternatively, you can also give the father of the bride speech right before the father-daughter dance, says Goldberg. "That way, the very last line in the father of the bride speech can be: 'My beautiful daughter, may I have this dance?'" (I'm not crying—you are!)

Who does the father of the bride thank in his speech?

It's important to thank your wedding guests for attending, especially anyone who traveled from out of town to be present. You can also mention your wife or partner and reflect on how you've bonded as a family throughout the wedding planning process. Lastly, it's nice to give a special shout-out to your new in-laws and anyone else who contributed significantly to the wedding.

However, Peterson warns, "Long thank-yous are boring and not necessary." Instead, she recommends "focus[ing] on the main folks who it would make sense for them to receive a dedicated shout-out."

Samantha Iacia contributed to the reporting of this article.

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• Who Gives a Speech at a Wedding Reception? How to Write a Wedding Toast Tips for the Father of the Bride Speech How to Write a Best Man Toast Advice for the Maid of Honor Speech What to Know About a Newlywed Toast Public Speaking Experts' Wedding Speech Tips 60 Quotes to Use for Your Wedding Toast

How to Write and Deliver a Perfect Father-of-the-Bride Speech

We're taking the guesswork out of this important moment.

Photo by Tanya Menoni

In This Article

The father-of-the-bride speech is one of the most anticipated toasts of any wedding reception . If you're a dad, you've likely looked forward to (or maybe dreaded) giving this speech for a very long time. Now that the moment is growing closer, it's important to sit down and write a toast that not only you're proud of, but that the happy couple will remember for a lifetime. While it might seem difficult to find the right words to express the endless love you have for your daughter and your excitement for her life with her new spouse, it's those very emotions that are often the star of the show. Feel free to let those feelings flow through your speech—you'll likely see most of the guests grab their tissues.

With that said, even the most eloquent dads can struggle with getting those words down on paper. To get you started, we created an easy guide to follow when you're sitting down to frame your thoughts into a full-fledged speech. We've compiled some top-notch tips for writing that sure-to-be epic father-of-the-bride speech, plus a list of brainstorming ideas to jump-start the creative process.

Read on for advice on how to write and deliver your father-of-the-bride speech—the most memorable toast of the day.

Father-of-the-Bride Speech Template

Here's a general outline for writing a father-of-the-bride speech that’ll have everyone reaching for tissues.

Welcome the guests.

Typically, the parents of the couple are the first to speak at either the rehearsal dinner or the wedding reception. If you're the first toast-maker of the night, this would be the time to welcome all of the guests to the reception or whichever event you are delivering the speech at. You can do this welcome speech with your partner, on your own, or followed by your child's fiancé's parents. Of course, feel free to skip this step if you're not the first speech and the guests have already been welcomed.

Give thanks.

Since you have the mic, don't forget to express gratitude. Be sure to thank your friends and family for coming to the wedding, and the parents of your daughter's new spouse for anything and everything that they did.

Pepper in some fond memories.

Nothing gets the waterworks started like some heartfelt anecdotes from the bride's lifetime through the eyes of their beloved dad. Choose some especially warm memories from her childhood that always stick out in your mind or some funny (not embarrassing) trials from adolescence. If one of those special memories includes their significant other, definitely be sure to share that with the guests.

Share your pride.

As the father of the bride , you're entitled to be a very proud papa. Mention some especially big moments of pride for you and how much you cherish your daughter's achievements. Don't confuse this with an excuse to spout off their résumé, though. Only pick a couple of standout highlights that really speak to their character.

Remember that half the guests in attendance probably won't know your daughter all that well, so this is an excellent time to low-key introduce them to their best qualities and character traits.

Talk about the present.

Try not to live completely in the past, Dad! Discuss notable things that are occurring presently, on this momentous day as it's unfolding. While everyone is experiencing the events from their own perspective, your special POV provides a unique lens on the significance of the occasion.

Acknowledge your daughter's new spouse.

While you have so much to say about the bride, remember to mention and acknowledge their new spouse , too. Take this time to welcome them into your family and share what it means to you. You can also share some anecdotes of their relationship and what stood out to you most.

Tell your daughter you love them.

That's your baby right there, and this is the moment to tell them just how much they mean to you. Express how much you love and cherish your daughter. Remind them of how you've treasured your relationship together and how you think that relationship may be evolving or staying exactly the same.

Look to the future.

You've covered the past and present, now move on to the next chapter and speak about the shared future of the newlyweds. While you can always get creative with the flow of the speech, breaking things down in a classic chronological order is always easy for the guests to follow.

Add some parting wisdom.

Whether it's a piece of marriage advice or just your most heartfelt wishes for the newlyweds, include some sage wisdom for the happy couple. This is pinnacle dad-talk time, so be sure to really relish the moment. Just don't forget that there are other people present, and it's not just you and your daughter.

Father-of-the-Bride Speech Tips

Okay, Dad! Now that you have a general idea of what to include, take note of these essential tips for writing and giving the best father-of-the-bride speech anyone has ever heard.

Consider a theme.

Having an overarching theme from the get-go will set a tone for the speech as a whole. This should make it easier for you to succinctly organize your thoughts and choose relevant examples to showcase. Utilizing this type of framework will result in cohesive and meaningful content that will come across as inspired and have the audience hanging on every word.

Keep it short.

Though you've been waiting for this day to come for many years, try to keep your toast short and sweet. The ideal length is about five or six minutes with the three-minute mark being your lowest threshold for a proper speech. There may be a lot you want to say, and if that's the case, consider writing some of those heartfelt sentiments down beforehand and giving it to your daughter in a card to read privately the morning of the wedding.

Don't be too embarrassing.

Skip the stories that may make your daughter cringe or those memories that they wish you would just forget already. Remember, the speech is a toast and not a roast. Keep in mind that along with their newly minted spouse, a whole new family of in-laws and possibly even a few work colleagues will be present. So, if there's something you're on the fence about saying, consider if you would think the information appropriate for your in-laws and colleagues to learn about you.

Skip ex mentions.

If you have an urge to call out how terrible some ex-boyfriends or girlfriends were in the past, skip that little tidbit and keep it to yourself. There's never any good that can come from name-dropping old lovers at your daughter's wedding, no matter how much you really disliked old what's-their-name. Stick to positive anecdotes and memories that showcase your daughter's good side, not mistakes.

Don't push for laughs.

Oftentimes, you'll get laughs when you're not trying hard for them. Don't feel like you have to color your toast with joke line after joke line—it may come off as forced, especially if you're not normally the jokester in the bunch. The most important person in the room, your daughter, will definitely know if you're not being yourself, and all they really need is their dad—not a comedian.

Embrace your emotions.

It's an absolute given that this is an emotional day for you, so don't feel the need to act stoic and put up a façade. Stay genuine and admit to how difficult it is to let your child go. These admissions make for a touching moment, and we guarantee there won't be a dry eye left in the room. And we mean you, too, pops. Today is the day when it's perfectly okay to shed a tear or two.

Practice, practice, practice.

And then practice some more. It's important that you attempt to memorize your speech, and at the very least, have everything written down and a general idea of what you want to say. If memorizing the whole speech is a little too difficult to do in such a short amount of time, be sure to practice it enough beforehand so that you can make eye contact with the couple and the other guests.

Get Brainstorming!

If you're still drawing a blank, here are some questions to ask yourself to start brainstorming.

• Who is speaking directly before or after me? (You may want to introduce the next speaker or reference whoever spoke previously.)
• What emotions do I experience when I think of letting my daughter go?
• What do I wish for their marriage and life together, and how can I prepare them for that?
• Is there anything I would like to say to their in-laws or newly acquired family?
• Is there something in the order of events that the audience needs to know, prepare for, or be aware of? (Your role can also assume that of master of ceremonies, so be mindful of the flow of upcoming events and if you need to alert the guests.)

Traditionally, the father of the bride gives the first speech at a wedding. But, of course, couples can choose any order they want speeches to take place in. 

If the mother of the bride is speaking directly after the father of the bride, they may choose to stand next to their significant other during the speech. In other cases, the father will be standing alone with the bride's mother being at her seat. 

Whatever you do, don't feel stressed out by the idea of giving a speech. Keep it short, speak from the heart, and don't embarrass the couple (okay, don't embarrass them too much) and you'll be well on your way to the perfect toast.

A Guide to Wedding Reception Toasts

Who Gives a Speech at a Wedding Reception?

How to Write a Wedding Toast

Tips for the Father of the Bride Speech

How to Write a Best Man Toast

Advice for the Maid of Honor Speech

What to Know About a Newlywed Toast

Public Speaking Experts' Wedding Speech Tips

60 Quotes to Use for Your Wedding Toast

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Tips For Writing Great Father Of The Bride Speeches + Examples

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In this article about the father of the bride’s speech, we delve into the poignant moment of the wedding ceremony where a father expresses pride in his daughter and joy in the creation of a new family. The father’s speech is not only a moment of pride but also a significant expression of emotions as his daughter embarks on a new chapter, contributing to the formation of a family filled with love and happiness.

So, here are some tips for preparing your speech . Check out father of the bride speeches examples and tips below.

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How To Write Brilliant Father Of The Bride Speeches

Introduce yourself and welcome guests.

The first thing you want to do is introduce yourself. You can start with a joke if you want, but keep it short and clean!

Next, you want to formally welcome your guests including family members, friends, and other esteemed guests, including the groom’s parents and officiant. Thank them for coming and sharing in this important occasion.

Share Heart-Warming Stories From Bride’s Childhood

Endearing stories about the bride are the heart and soul of the father of the bride’s speech. You are one of the few people who has known her for her entire life so undoubtedly you have quite a few tender moments you could share. Also, you could talk about how you felt the day the bride was born and how she changed your life for the better.

Include some funny and touching moments from her childhood and teenage years. Tell her how proud of the woman she is today. Mention how you are happy that she found the love of her life (mention her husband here). Also, remember that her best friend may cover some of the same stories in her maid of honor speech so you may want to compare notes with her.

“Ladies and gentlemen, today, as I stand here with a heart full of joy and a touch of nostalgia, I can’t help but reminisce about the beautiful journey my daughter has had. From the moment she took her first steps to the day she walked into the arms of her soulmate, every step has been a testament to the incredible person she is.

I remember the day she was born, a bundle of joy that filled our lives with laughter and love. Her childhood was adorned with countless funny and touching moments—her infectious laughter, her determination, and even the occasional mischief that always managed to put a smile on our faces.

As she blossomed into the incredible woman she is today, finding her love in [husband’s name], my heart swells with pride. To witness the love that has grown between them is truly magical. So here’s to the little girl who changed my life for the better and to the remarkable woman she has become. Cheers to love, laughter, and a lifetime of happiness for [bride’s name] and [husband’s name].”

Talk About Your Son-in-Law

Next to talking about your daughter, speaking about your son-in-law is the most important part of your father-of-the-bride speech. Be sure to tell him how you feel about him and how much he means to your family.

You can incorporate some humor as well but try to keep it heart-warming. You could talk about the first time you met him, or how he has improved your daughter’s life. Lovingly and sincerely welcome him to your family.

“Ladies and gentlemen, if I may take a moment to express my sentiments about the remarkable man who now holds a special place in our family – my son-in-law, [son-in-law’s name]. From the first time we met, I could sense something extraordinary about him. Maybe it was the way he made my daughter laugh, or the kindness that radiated from him.

[son-in-law’s name], you’ve not only won my daughter’s heart but the hearts of our entire family. Your presence has brought an added layer of joy and completeness to our lives. I still remember the first time I saw you together, and I knew then that you were someone truly special.

So, with a heart full of gratitude and warmth, I want to officially welcome you to our family. May your journey with [bride’s name] be filled with love, laughter, and an abundance of cherished moments. Here’s to the wonderful man who has enriched our lives. Cheers!”

Add A Funny Story About Couple

At this point, you could include a funny story about the couple. Remember to keep it clean, and nothing too embarrassing. Making the newlywed’s blush and giggle is one thing. You don’t want to humiliate them or make them uncomfortable on their wedding day.

Funny anecdotes will keep the guests engaged in your father-of-the-bride speech. Perhaps you have a humorous story about the first time she brought him over for dinner. Or maybe something funny from the wedding preparations. Keep it light and appropriate.

“Ladies and gentlemen, let me share a little tale about our lovely couple that brings a smile to my face. It was the first time [son-in-law’s name] came over for dinner, and let’s just say, we had a slight kitchen mishap. I attempted to impress him with my culinary skills, and, well, the smoke detectors were equally impressed.

As the kitchen filled with a not-so-subtle haze, [bride’s name] and [son-in-law’s name] exchanged glances, and I thought, ‘Well, this is one way to make a lasting impression.’ Little did we know, that incident became a cherished story in our family, reminding us that laughter truly is the best seasoning.

Add A Few Words About Groom’s Parents

You should always include something about the groom’s parents in your speech. They are now part of your family, as you are part of theirs. You will be spending time with them during the holidays, birthdays and other joint family events. And you could even share in the blessing of future grandchildren.

Thank them for sharing in the big day and becoming part of your family, as well as any part they took in the wedding. Congratulate them on the fine job they did raising their son and how happy you are to welcome them all to your family.

“As we celebrate the union of [bride’s name] and [son-in-law’s name], it’s a joyous occasion not only for our family but for [son-in-law’s name]’s family as well. I want to take a moment to express our deepest gratitude to [son-in-law’s mother’s name] and [son-in-law’s father’s name], who have warmly welcomed us into their lives.

Today marks the beginning of a shared journey, not just for [bride’s name] and [son-in-law’s name], but for our families joining together. To [son-in-law’s mother’s name] and [son-in-law’s father’s name], thank you for your kindness, love, and for the integral role you played in creating the wonderful person who now stands by my daughter’s side.

As we move forward, I look forward to the shared celebrations, the laughter, and the many beautiful moments that our families will create together. Here’s to the start of a new chapter for all of us.”

Talk About Your Own Love Story With Bride’s Mother

Do not neglect to introduce your wife, the bride’s mother. Share a brief story about how you met and your lives together. Tell her that you love her as much today as you did on your wedding day.

Thank her for her part in raising your daughter to be the beautiful woman she is today. Perhaps share a story of how much your daughter is like her mother. Spend a moment or two doting on your wife and then tie it to your daughter and her new husband.

“Ladies and gentlemen, amidst the celebration of [bride’s name] and [son-in-law’s name], I want to share a glimpse of the enduring love that anchors our family. A heartfelt thank you to my wonderful wife, [wife’s name], who has been my companion in this remarkable journey. From our ‘I do’ to the shared joys, she remains my constant. [wife’s name], your grace and strength have shaped [bride’s name] into the remarkable woman she is today. As we witness the next chapter unfold with [bride’s name] and [son-in-law’s name], I’m reminded of the beautiful love story that started with us. Cheers to enduring love!”

Finish With A Toast

In keeping with tradition, your father of the bride’s speech should end with a toast. Ask everyone to stand with me and raise their glasses to the happy couple on their wedding day.

The toast itself does not have to belong. In fact, it should not be longer than the speech itself. Just say a few short sentences congratulating the bride and groom and wishing them a happy life together. Use some examples of father-of-the-bride wedding toasts :

• Example 1: “Please stand with me and raise your glass to toast the happy couple. (Bride’s name) has been the light of my life for the past 25 years and today I hand her over to (groom’s name). I know he will love and cherish her every bit as much as I do a toast to a happy and healthy life full of endless love and laughter!”
• Example 2: “Please join me in a toast to _____ and _______. (Groom’s name), you have become like a son to me, and I am entrusting (bride’s name) to you. Cherish every moment you have together. Let us all wish the happy couple a lifetime of joy!”
• Example 3: “Please raise your glass to the newlyweds. When (bride’s name) was only 13 years old she told me that she wanted to marry (groom’s name). I watched them grow from happy and carefree teenagers to happy, loving and caring adults. Let’s offer a toast to many years of wedded bliss!”
• Example 4: “When (groom) first showed up at my front door, I never imagined he would be the one to steal my baby’s heart. But here we are today, and I couldn’t be happier for them. Let’s raise our glass to the (bride and groom) and wish them many years of happiness!”
• Example 5: “Please join my wife and I as we raise our glasses to the beautiful, kind, and loving couple. We welcome you to our family, and we look forward to many years of holiday dinners, family vacations, and late-night phone calls. Cheers to ___ and ___!”

Father Of The Bride Speeches: Examples And Template

Father of the bride speeches can be difficult to write, because it’s an emotional time for a father, and there is so much you might want to include in your speech However, with a few tips, you should be able to put down a beautiful speech that expresses your emotions perfectly, one that your daughter will be proud of.

Best Father Of The Bride Speeches

When preparing your speech, speak from your heart and be genuine. Don’t worry about trying to be funny or overly sentimental. Keep it concise, but meaningful. And don’t forget to practice beforehand so that you can deliver your words with confidence and ease. Your daughter will appreciate your heartfelt words, and you’ll create a memory that will last a lifetime.

“Good evening, everyone. For those who don’t know me, I’m the father of the bride. Today, I’m overflowing with emotions as I stand here to give this speech. I am incredibly proud of my daughter, and I couldn’t be happier that she has found such a wonderful partner in [groom’s name]. From the moment I met him, I knew he was the one for her. His kind heart and warm smile captured our hearts, and we welcome him with open arms into our family. My advice to the newlyweds is to always communicate, be honest with each other, and most importantly, never forget why you fell in love with each other. To my daughter, you will always be my little girl, and I will always be here to support and love you. So, let’s raise a glass to the newlyweds, wishing you a lifetime of love and happiness.”

Heartfelt Father Of The Bride Speech

Giving heartfelt and emotional father-of-the-bride speeches can really take it out of you. But, if you find the right words, and you aren’t afraid to let your emotions show, you should do well. “I am Allen, Scarlet’s father, as most of you know. This is my proudest and happiest moment, watching her today and being able to reflect on all the years I watched her grow up. She was the most beautiful baby, and I’m lucky to have been able to be with her and guide her as she grew into the magnificent woman that she is today. She captured my heart then, and she still holds it now, my beautiful girl, my sunshine. I will always be fortunate to be called your father. And as I watch her get married today, to such a wonderful young man, I can say that my happiness is full. I can’t say that I give the most brilliant father of the bride speeches as I have never had to give one, but I can say this with all confidence. The two of you are about to begin a long journey. One that will be filled with all the love and happiness I have seen between you both, and more. And while on this journey, know that I and your mother will be there on the sidelines, ready to assist with anything that you need to succeed. May you always be true to each other, and may you always be kind to each other. May you share in all of the burdens all of the joys and all the happiness that this world has in store for you both. I ask you all to join me in raising a toast to my beautiful daughter and her amazing husband. I wish them a long and happy life together. Love you both to the moon and back.”

Funny Father Of The Bride Speech

If humor comes naturally to you, then giving the funny father-of-the-bride speeches would be your forte. And, if you need some inspiration, here is a sample that could be helpful.

“Hello everyone, I’m the proud father of this lady right here, Sasha, and the spanking new father-in-law of the handsome man beside her, David. And I would have to say, if any of these names sound strange to you, then you are probably at the wrong wedding.

It was a little difficult writing my speech for today because at first, my wife recommended that I do not say anything embarrassing or stupid, and then late she suggested that I just be myself. Well, that’s hard and not confusing at all.

I must say that I have always looked forward to the day that someone would step forward and take Sasha and all her endless demands far away from me and my bank account. And I am so happy David, that you had the courage to do so, good man. In fact, although I question his tastes in football teams, I have never questioned his loyalty to my daughter, and my bank account agrees.

From the first day that I met David and his shiny new braces, I knew that any man who could care for his teeth like that, without shame, would be able to care for my daughter no matter the consequences. I have to admit that we’re all glad he’s present here today minus those dentures.

My advice to you both today is love and laughter. Although marriage is as serious as a mortgage and should be taken as seriously, just be sure to have fun. Life will bring its ups and downs, but as long as you remember to laugh at each other and with each other through it all, you will succeed.

I give you Sasha and David, the bride and groom.”

Short Father Of the Bride Speech

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While writing father of the bride speeches may not be a walk in the park, with the right sample father of the bride speeches to guide you, you are sure to succeed. Make your daughter proud on the most special day of her life.

“Just like childbirth, marriage marks a new beginning. One that we are overjoyed to witness in our family. From the day you captured my heart as a newborn, to today when I walked you down the aisle, I have never stopped feeling grateful that you call me Papa. I hope that I have always lived up to your expectations, just as your husband will as you begin this journey together.

I am happy for the union of these two families as the [Bride] and [Groom] begin a brand new family of their own. And I am proud that my daughter has grown into this amazing woman and that she met a man who is just as amazing. I love you son. This is my wish that you build your lives together and enjoy a relationship like no other.

I offer you my warmest wishes and congratulations on this beautiful and joyous day. Please join me as we raise our glasses to the bride and groom. May your lives be filled with love and laughter always.”

Here is an example of a father of the bride speech to help you with your preparations for your wedding speech .

Things To Avoid In Father of The Bride Speech

If you have ever given a best man speech , you might have some idea as to where to start. However, there are some differences to take heed to the following advice.

• Avoid inappropriate jokes or stories: Stay away from anything that could embarrass or offend the couple or guests.
• Steer clear of excessive personal anecdotes: Focus on the couple rather than sharing too many personal stories unrelated to their special day.
• Don’t make it too long: Keep your speech concise to maintain interest and prevent it from becoming tedious.
• Avoid excessive alcohol consumption: Maintain clarity and composure by limiting alcohol intake before delivering your speech.
• Don’t overshadow the groom: Ensure the speech is balanced, acknowledging the groom’s role and expressing warm sentiments toward him.
• Avoid controversial or sensitive topics: Steer clear of divisive subjects that could create discomfort or tension among guests.

Wedding Speech vs. Wedding Toast: What’s the Difference?

A wedding toast is a statement of good wishes to the couple that often ends with the raising of glasses, clinking, and drinking. It usually comes at the end of a speech but can also stand independently. A speech is often longer than a toast and often tells a story.

Is it OK to read the father of the bride speech?

It is okay to read the father of the bride speech. No one is required to get a certificate in public speaking before giving wedding speeches, so it’s fine to have notes as long as you have at least practiced beforehand.

How long should the father of the bride speech be?

Typically, the speech itself should be around 5 minutes.

What Should A Father Of The Bride Speech Include?

A father of the bride speech should include a warm welcome, anecdotes about the bride, words of wisdom, a heartfelt blessing for the couple, and a memorable toast. It should express love, pride, and best wishes for the newlyweds.

Keep these tips for writing a father of the bride speeches when you are composing your own speech. Take the time to practice in front of your wife, a friend or even a camera. Just speak from the heart and you will be fine!

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How to Write the Perfect Father of the Bride Speech, in 7 Easy Steps

Here are some tips for how to floor your daughter (and the wedding guests!) with your father of the bride speech.

Vitaly M Photography

Your daughter is getting married. It’s a monumental day for not only her, but also for you, her father. She’s asked you to present a father of the bride speech (on of the traditional  father of the bride duties ), and you’re probably honored, but also a bit apprehensive. You want this father of the bride toast to floor her, like she’s floored you so many times in her life. Traditionally, father of the bride speeches either starts off or concludes the wedding reception toasts , so you’ll have everybody’s attention. You, as the father, have a unique perspective on this woman standing in front of everyone. Whether you're bursting with ideas or have a serious case of writer's block, it can be tricky to sit down and figure out how to write a father of the bride speech. 

It’s time to write the father of the bride speech you’ve always dreamed of giving. We’re here to help.

1. start your father of the bride speech with a few thank-yous..

As with any wedding toast, it's extra important that you kick off your father of the bride speech by introducing yourself and thanking whoever needs to be thanked in your early sentences. Many father of the bride speeches thank the guests for attending, as well as those who were instrumental in planning the big day (this may include your spouse). Introduce yourself as the father of the bride and feel free to make a joke about yourself. You can make a “dad joke,” or a pun, if that’s your style.

2. Mention any loved ones who you are remembering. 

If it feels right to you, mention any family members who aren't physically present at the wedding in your father of the bride toast. “I keep thinking of your mom, who would have absolutely loved to be here.” You can keep this sweet and simple. You don’t have to include it at all, but it could be a nice tribute to loved ones .

The Secret Garden at Rancho Santa Fe

3. Share any special memories of your child. 

Unless her older sibling or mother presents a speech, you have a plethora of memories to include in your father of the bride speech from a time in her life that no one else has tucked away. People love hearing stories from childhood, and you should capitalize on that . It can be sentimental or embarrassing – though, not too embarrassing. It is her day, after all.

Recall the day you brought her home from the hospital, and what you were thinking and feeling. Remember the time she brought a wounded bird into your house and demanded, through tears, that you two nursed it back to health? That was one moment out of many that you realized just how caring and generous your daughter has always been. Bring up the time she broke a bone (for the sixth time), because she was always so incredibly adventurous. You’ve always worried about her, but you know she can take care of herself. Our favorite father of the bride speech examples are ones where the giver uses an anecdote to share something about the bride's personality or his relationship with her. 

4. Talk about your new in-law.

Your daughter is the light of your life, but you have a new “child” in your life now. It would be nice to address her partner directly in your father of the bride speech, and thank them for making your daughter so incredibly happy. However you feel appropriate doing this, depending on your relationship with your new in-law , is up to you.

Use your father of the bride speech reminisce about the time when you first met him/her. If you’re particularly close with your daughter, maybe she called you after their first date – what were you thinking? Has there been a time you were particularly glad to have them around? This can be sentimental or funny, but it should be genuine – regardless of your true feelings. Maybe, on a family vacation, the car broke down, and her partner’s handy skills in a crisis made you really appreciate their presence. This is a funnier story, but can lead into a genuine appreciation. Most importantly, they have made your daughter incredibly happy, so definitely make sure to express gratitude and a warm welcome to the family.

Christy Renee Photography

5. Give some advice in your father of the bride speech.

You are older and wiser, so if it makes sense for you, give the new couple a piece of advice toward a happy marriage — or just happiness in general — in your father of the bride speech. Whether you’re married, divorced, or happily single doesn't matter. If you don’t feel equipped to offer advice, then don't force it. But, considering how many dads love to offer unsolicited advice to their children, this is a great opportunity.

If you are married, offer your secret . It can be real or a joke. But try to avoid sexist tropes, if you can. Jokes like, “Married men always have the same boss,” are tired and overused. More importantly than that, it presents an image of marriage to the new couple that isn’t ideal. If you do have genuine advice, though, feel free to offer it – even if you aren’t married. Don't joke about the divorce rate, though. It will only succeed in ensuing awkwardness for everyone present.

6. Use a quote, but don't force it.

This won't necessarily work for all father of the bride speeches. But, if it feels natural to work a quote that particularly speaks to you in your toast, you shouldn't feel like you have to shy away from it. It can be a sweet way to end your speech. Also, it doesn't have to be some profound quote — and this is what I mean about not forcing it. Don't use a quote just for the sake of using one. But, if there’s a quote that speaks to you on a personal level, it can be great. It doesn’t have to be serious. If you and your daughter have a special bond over something, like, The Simpsons , a comedic quote can be great provided you deliver it with confidence.

7. End with a toast.

If you're unsure of how to end your father of the bride speech, a toast is a crowd-pleaser. Offer up your congratulations and invite everyone to toast to the happy couple. Remind your daughter that you are proud of her, that you love her, and that you're so happy for her that she found someone who treats her well. Welcome your new in law to the family one last time, take a sip of your drink, and go hug your daughter – who may very well be crying .

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Father of The Bride Speech: The Ultimate Guide

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Traditionally the father of the bride is the first to speak at a wedding and so unless you’re a seasoned speech giver, it can feel like a daunting task.

Add to that the fact that alongside walking your daughter down the aisle it’ll probably be one of the proudest moments of your life and suddenly writing this special speech seems almost impossible.

Just how do you sum up your feelings in a few hundred words?

The good news is that father of the bride speeches are meant to be heart-warming and full of emotion, so no-one is expecting you to give a performance to rival a stand-up comedian. That said, no-one wants to sit in awkward silence while the father regales countless stories of the bride as a baby.

It’s important to get the tone and content of this much-anticipated wedding speech exactly right to ensure both your daughter and all the guests find it entertaining, uplifting, touching, and most importantly not at all embarrassing!

If you’ve got no idea where to start when it comes to writing a fantastic father of the bride speech, we’ve got some top tips and dos and don’ts to help you put pen to paper and create a standout wedding speech that your daughter will never forget.

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Father Of The Bride Speech Template

While you’ll want your wedding speech to be completely unique, it can help to follow a tried and tested template when you start to write and then let the original ideas start to flow from there…

1. Introduce Yourself

Introduce yourself and welcome all the guests to the special day (ask the bride for any special mentions she might want to include here like friends who have traveled from overseas).

2. Talk About The Bride

Talk about how proud you are of her achievements etc. and also provide funny (but not embarrassing) anecdotes about her as a little girl that are relevant to who she is today.

3. Pay Tribute To The Woman She Has Become

Talk about her job or anything she does that makes you proud now as well as any relevant stories about her as an adult.

4. Talk About How The Bride Met Her New Spouse

Make sure to include any funny stories from when you first met him or her. For example, is he/she normally full of bravado but was nervous as hell asking you if he/she could marry your daughter? Talk about the groom (or other bride) and their family and how happy you are to have them join your family.

5. Give Some Advice On Marriage

Best not to do this if you’ve been divorced 4 times, although you could joke about this in your speech, or just give some general advice about life. Perhaps you were told something on your wedding day that you’ve always remembered and want to pass on.

6. Raise A Toast To The Happy Couple

Try and make this as personalised as possible and unique to the couple. You could just toast their happy marriage or come up with a list of a few specific wishes that you want the guests to toast to.

What Should A Father Of The Bride Speech Include?

A traditional father of the bride speech includes a few key elements such as welcoming the guests, anecdotes and compliments about your daughter, a welcome to your new son-in-law or daughter-in-law, words of advice and a toast to the new couple.

How Do You End The Father Of The Bride Speech?

It always works well to end a father of the bride speech with a few words of wisdom for the newly married couple, followed by a strong heartfelt toast that you invite all the guests to take part in.

The Dos And Don’ts Of A Good Father Of The Bride Speech

1. ask for help.

Before you even think about writing your first draft, it can really help to have a brainstorm with a few key people.

Ask the bride’s mother, any siblings, or really close family to come together to reminisce about the bride, as they may remember some absolutely hilarious or key stories that you’ve forgotten.

You can go back and forth to this family group while writing too for extra details and clarification on facts, plus it’ll help you feel a lot less pressure than you would if you were going solo.

2. Focus On A Good Introduction

As you’re opening the speeches section of the wedding, it’s important not to just go straight into your speech at 100mph and instead to introduce yourself. While most people in the room will know who you are, there may be a few who don’t.

Plus, it’s a nice easy way to confidently ease yourself into public speaking. Try not to sound too robotic by just saying your name and that you’re the bride’s dad! Think of a more heartfelt way to say you’re her father.

You can also really quickly put wedding guests at ease by making them laugh. It doesn’t have to be a silly gag or a hilarious joke, but just something cute and quirky about the bride or perhaps an observation about the day that can really help get the ball rolling.

3. Don’t Spend Ages Thanking People

The father of the groom speech is not the time to go through everyone that needs thanking – this often happens during the groom’s speech and you can be sure that if you go down this route that you’ll massively wrong-foot the groom and make his speech rather difficult to deliver without major repetition.

Confine your thanks to a general one – simply thank everyone for coming to the wedding and watching the proudest moment of your life as your daughter gets married.

4. Use Clever Quotes

If it feels suitable for your speech, you can use famous quotes to get your point across and provide a bit of pace to the delivery. Some fathers like to open with a quote from someone famous and use it as a way to introduce an overarching theme that’ll carry on through the speech.

If you’re known for being a showman or a bit of a character, a dramatically delivered quote can get the guests laughing straightway. If not, find a quote that sums up exactly how you feel about the bride and use it instead of your own words if you can’t quite get the sentiment right.

5. Don’t Embarrass Your Daughter

There’s a fine line between a funny and sweet anecdote and one that’ll make your guests cringe.

You don’t want to make anyone, especially the bride, feel uncomfortable, so stick to stories that are heartfelt and meaningful rather than too graphic. No one needs to hear that she wet the bed until she was 11!

You can still take the mickey out of her though, but in a much more charming way.

Choose stories that are relevant to who she is today. Perhaps she was obsessed with animals from the moment she could talk and brought all manner of horrible bugs into your house – now she’s a vet it all makes sense.

Maybe she was the clumsiest little girl you’ve ever known so it’s incredible that she’s now a successful dancer.

Perhaps she had a crazy imagination that got her into all sorts of trouble (insert funny anecdotes here), but she’s now managed to harness it into a successful career as a novelist.

6. Make Your Speech Different

When talking about your daughter and how much you love her it’s important to avoid clichés and words that could apply to any bride.

We’re talking about “beautiful”, “amazing”, “kind” etc.

Think about what makes her who she is and celebrate these traits.

Remember no-one is perfect, and just because it’s her wedding day doesn’t mean you have to make her sound like the ideal woman. The guests want to hear about all the good bits as well as the slightly less so, as it’s much more real and will represent the person they know and love.

7. Don’t Mention Any Exes

This is a key one that shouldn’t be broken – DO NOT mention any exes. No-one wants to remember a time when the happy couple weren’t together or imagine the bride with another partner so just don’t go there, even if there’s a funny anecdote! It’s the quickest way to alienate the new in law to the family.

8. Spend Time Talking About Her New Husband Or Wife

On the other hand, not mentioning your new son-in-law or daughter-in-law in your wedding speech is almost as bad as the groom forgetting to mention his new wife in his wedding speech. While the father of the bride speech is predominantly about your daughter, you have to dedicate at least a sentence or two to her chosen partner.

Make sure to say how happy you are that the bride met their partner and how much happiness he/she clearly brings into her life.

You can talk about what your impressions were the first time you met him/her and how your relationship has grown or include funny stories about the early years of their relationship.

9. Mention The Bride’s Mother And New In-Laws

It’s important not to single-handedly take credit for your amazing daughter in your speech (unless of course, you raised her all alone).

Spend time talking about any good traits she has inherited from her mother and how special their relationship is. Even if you’re divorced from her mother, a line or two acknowledging her part in your child’s life will be very well appreciated.

10. Impart Some Wisdom For The Newlyweds

Once you’ve run out of anecdotes and have said all the beautiful words about how you feel, it’s time to impart some advice.

This can go one of two ways.

Perhaps you’ve had a successful and long marriage and therefore you can draw inspiration from both the wonderful and hard times to pass on some key bits of advice. If you’re known for being a bit hapless when it comes to marriages and relationships you can make this section funny and tell the couple not to do anything you did!

If this is the case you can also always ask other successfully married couples from within the guests for their advice before the big day and then impart this. Your daughter will appreciate the effort you’ve gone to, to ensure that you had something meaningful to pass on to her at such a huge stage in her life.

11. Don’t Make The Speech About You

Remember this speech is meant to be about your daughter and the person she is marrying today.

If once you’ve written the speech and are reading through it and you find yourself repeatedly saying “I” or “me” more than “she” or “her”, then chances are you’ve made the speech too much about you.

Yes, the anecdotes are your stories to tell, but they should focus on your daughter and why they are relevant to who she is today rather than how they made you feel or how they impacted you.

12. End With A Toast

As the first speechmaker, you can’t just tail off.

A strong end is key to the overall success of the speech and helps draw a line under your words and the start of the next speech.

So, make sure you have a really good finishing sentence, followed by a clear call to the guests to stand and toast. You need to make sure the guests know exactly what you want them to do otherwise you’ll end up with a half-hearted end with some standing up and some not and a mish-mash of words. Clearly state the words you want them to toast with and invite the guests to stand to ensure a resounding toast!

Now all that’s left to do is practise reading out your father of the bride speech, in a confident – and slow – manner and make sure you smile while doing it.

It can also be a really good idea to ask your wife or partner to read through the draft speech too. Just to make sure you’ve remembered the anecdotes properly (we’re all prone to the odd embellishment!) and also to check that you’re not veering off into embarrassing territory.

Father Of The Bride Speech Examples

Take some inspiration from fathers who have been there, done that and got the t-shirt with these brilliant father of the bride speech examples from real weddings.

Heartfelt father of the bride speech

A heartfelt speech is always a winner and this father  covers all the main points in a meaningful and heartwarming manner.

Father of the bride speech full of funny anecdotes

The extract from this hilarious speech shows how to weave anecdotes into your speech while also ensuring it focusses on your daughter and not you.

Alternative father of the bride speech

If you want to wow guests and your daughter consider pulling something alternative and wow-factor out the bag like this funny and entertaining video speech .

Emotional father of the bride speech

Emotional speeches don’t have to be embarrassing to watch. This father delivered a perfectly eloquent speech that focuses on the emotion and real meaning of the day.

Funny poem father of the bride

This father manages to keep the guests’ laughing and involved with his witty speech delivered in poem format .

Short but sweet father of the bride speech

This speech is only a few minutes long, but the father of the bride covers the two most important points – talking about his daughter and complimenting his new son-in-law.

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How to Outline Your Father of the Bride Speech in Just 5 Minutes

How are you feeling about giving your  Father of the Bride Speech ?

Excited? Nervous? Stressed out?

Sometimes the hardest thing is just to get started.

You keep putting it off, hoping that inspiration will suddenly strike, but it never does. And all the while the big day draws closer and closer.

If this sounds familiar, creating a basic outline for your speech can really help.

So grab a blank sheet of paper and a pen or pencil. We’re going to outline your Father of the Bride speech in just five minutes.

Okay, got your paper and writing implement of choice? Great!

Write “My Speech Outline” in big letters at the top of the paper and double underline it (use a ruler if you really mean business!).

A quick note before we start…

The following exercise is all about speed. You’re not aiming get it exactly right first time – you’re just trying to generate some initial ideas as quickly as possible.

For each prompt, scribble down the first thing that comes into your head. And don’t worry about writing anything out in full, just write enough to jog your memory later on.

A final note: you might want to read the instructions once through before you start writing, just so you know what to expect.

Understood? Great – let’s get going. Start the clock!

⏳ Minute 1 – The Welcome

About this section.

An important part of being the Father of the Bride is to act as the wedding host, officially welcoming guests to the wedding and setting a friendly tone for the occasion.

So this section is about delivering a warm welcome and mentioning any special people.

Write the heading “The Welcome” and underline it.

Write down “Introduce myself and welcome everyone”.  (You can flesh this out later.)

Now write down the names of any friends or family members who deserve a special mention  – for example anyone who will have travelled a long way to attend the wedding.

Think of a simple comment to make about the their journey or where they’ve come from.

For example: “Ian and Jane have flown in from California – I hope the change in temperature wasn’t too much of a shock!”.

Write it down.

Next write down the names of any significant family members who will be absent  – perhaps because they have passed away.

Think of a simple comment that links each of those people to the event.

For example “I know Nana would have loved to see all the wonderful flowers”.

⏳⏳ Minutes 2 and 3 – The Bride

One of the most anticipated parts of the Father of the Bride speech is where he shares fond memories of his daughter growing up. Even people who know the Bride well will love to hear stories from her childhood.

Write “The Bride” as a heading and underline it.

Write down (in brief) your strongest memory of the day your daughter was born.

Next think of a memorable story of her as a young child, perhaps when you first noticed she was developing her own personality.

Jot down a quick note to remind you of that story.

Also think – what does that story reveal about her personality (e.g. she’s tough, caring, creative, etc.)

Write that down too.

Now think of a story of her as an older child, maybe a teen.

Make a note to remind you and also write down one or two words about what it says about her as a person.

Finally think of a story from her adult life – it could be about her meeting the Groom.

You might be wondering why I’m asking you to think what each story tells us about the Bride. This is simply because it gives you a neat way of introducing each story in your speech.

For example: “We realised quite early on that our daughter was a tough cookie. When she was just four she…”

⏳ Minute 4 – The Groom

Although the Father of the Bride speech tends to focus on the Bride, it is also important to mention the Groom and welcome him to your family.

Write “The Groom”. Underline it.

Think of a positive comment to make about your new son-in-law. This could be your first impression on meeting him or an observation about one of his (hopefully many!) good qualities.

(Even if your first impression was not positive, it could be fun to mention that – as long as you then go on to say how you later changed your mind).

Note it down.

Try to link this quality back to their marriage and think of an example of how he’s made your daughter happy or had a positive impact on her life since meeting her.

Note this down too.

⏳Minute 5 – Words of Wisdom

It is traditional to wrap up the Father of the Bride speech with a few words of wisdom to help the newlyweds enjoy a long and happy future together.

This can be an opportunity for humour, but it’s always best to come up with some thoughts that are personal to you and your family, rather than using a stock line taken from the internet.

Write “Words of Wisdom”. Underline it.

Think of a small piece of advice you can offer your daughter and her new husband based on your own experiences – and  write it down .

The advice might relate to

• how to avoid/resolve conflict
• how to keep the relationship fresh
• how to focus on what’s important in life

This would normally be heartfelt advice for future happiness based on your own experiences of marriage.

But if you do want to try something humorous, you could relate your ‘wise’ comments back to the earlier observations and stories about your daughter.

For example you could give tongue-in-cheek advice to the Groom about ‘handling’ his new Bride, based on your experiences as her father.

And that’s it!

You’re done. Well, almost done.

Write “The Toast” on your paper  – and now you’re really done.

(The toast is simply where ask guests to raise their glasses and toast the Bride and Groom.)

You should now be looking at a rough outline for your speech. Well done!

Feels great to have made a start, doesn’t it?

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This guide includes everything from father of the bride speeches and examples, to how to write your own corker of a father of the bride speech

Danielle Smith Photography

The day your daughter gets married is likely to be one of the proudest of your life, but that can sometimes be clouded by the pressure of writing a father of the bride speech . After all, it is one of the main father of the bride duties !

But we're here to tell you that there's  nothing to worry about. With our guide to writing and delivering a killer father of the bride speech, putting it together will be an absolute breeze.

With expert tips from a professional speech writer, and real father of the bride speech examples to use as inspiration, you can't go wrong with advice like this. And the best news? Being yourself, using your real life experiences and smiling are almost all you need to do. 

Simple, right? And on that note, we also have a short guide on how to write a father of the bride speech in just six simple steps - does it get much better than that? We think not.

The 30 Best Father of the Bride Speeches, Tips & Ideas

Whether you're feeling super nervous and aren't sure where to start, or you're confident and raring to go, this father of the speech guide will help you craft and deliver a speech that your daughter will be so proud of, and ensure you feel confident doing so. 

We've also included expert advice and tips from Heidi Ellert-McDermott, founder of Speechy and author of The Modern Couple's Guide to Wedding Speeches - if there's anyone who can give expert insight into writing the perfect father of the bride speech, it's Heidi. 

What is a Father of the Bride Speech?

What should father of the bride speeches include.

• How to Structure a Father of the Bride Speech?

Dos and Don'ts for Writing a Father of the Bride Speech

Father of the bride speech examples.

A father of the bride speech is a speech given by the bride's father during the speeches section of the wedding ceremony. 

Traditionally, the father of the bride gives a speech about his daughter on her wedding day, but it's not uncommon nowadays to have mother of the bride speeches in lieu of, or as well as a father of the bride speeches. 

Within the speech, you'll want to include a mixture of happy and funny memories about your daughter, as well as some advice for the couple, and welcoming your new son or daughter-in-law. Fore more on the specifics of what to include in a father of the bride speech, scroll on! 

Mark Horton P hotos

Though each one will be completely different to the other, when it comes to writing a father of the bride speech, there are some things we always recommend including. 

1. A Tribute to the Bride

Every father of the bride speech should include some touching words about just how brilliant your daughter is. Be specific and avoid anything too generic - you want to ensure these things could  only  be said about  your daughter. 

This is also the time to talk about some of her achievements, and the things that make you proud, but you don't want it to turn into a CV so stick to fewer but better for this part. 

If you and your partner are together, or are on good terms, this is also a nice moment to give a compliment to the bride's other parent and how they have helped you raise such a great daughter. 

2. Anecdotes & Special Memories

An introduction of your daughter and her brilliance leads perfectly into you talking about some poignant and special memories. Think about the moments that shaped who she is as a woman, and some funny stories that'll get the room giggling. 

You may also want to share moments that solidified your bond as father and daughter, and some slightly embarrassing tales, of course! 

3. Welcome Their Partner

Any good father of the bride speech will include a special mention of their daughter's partner.

It's important that you take some time out of your speech to welcome them to the family, or perhaps explain why there's no need for a welcome, and why they've already cemented their place in your family. 

Talk about why they make such a brilliant partner for your daughter, speak to their character and perhaps even give a special mention to their family as well. 

4. Advice for the Couple

Most father of the bride speeches will include some advice or marital anecdotes for the couple. This doesn't have to be hard-hitting advice, but it's always a nice touch to end on something of a gift in terms of words of wisdom.

You could go heartfelt and sweet, or light-hearted and funny - the choice is completely up to you! 

How to Structure a Father of the Bride Speech

Ensuring you include all of the above in a father of the bride speech is step one, but step two is knowing how to structure it. Once you have the structure of father of the bride speeches down, writing it will feel like a piece of cake! 

Below is the traditional structure of a good father of the bride speech, including tips from industry expert Heidi Ellert-McDermott.

1. Introduction

Use the beginning of a father of the bride speech to introduce yourself to the guests and welcome everybody to the wedding of your daughter and her partner. 

Heidi explains why this part is such a biggie: "If following a traditional wedding speech order, the father of the bride speech tends to be the first of the day, so dads should start by welcoming all the guests that have attended the wedding.

"Make the welcome heartfelt but try to include a touch of humour too. This will help you and your guests relax into the speech."

2. Say Thank You

In line with the introduction, it's also a good idea to thank everyone for coming, and those in particular who helped plan or fund the wedding. This is usually where you will thank your new in-laws as well as members of your own family. 

3. About Your Daughter

Once you have done a short introduction and a few snappy thank yous, it's time to get to the heart of your speech and talk about your daughter.

Using the tips below, spend this part of the speech celebrating your daughter for the wonderful woman she is. 

Adding to this, Heidi explains that no father of the bride speech would be complete without a bit of praise for your daughter on her wedding day, "Whether it’s towards the end or at the beginning of the speech, a dad should always remember to publicly acknowledge how beautiful the bride looks.

"It can be easily forgotten by fathers sitting down to write their speeches months before the day but it’s not something you want to miss out."

4. Talk About the Couple

Once you've spoken about your daughter, pivot to talking about her partner, and welcome them and their family into yours. 

Heidi gives her take on how you can make this tribute special: "Again, this should be a mix of entertaining and meaningful.

"Pinpoint the unique characteristics that make them the ideal partner for your daughter. Do they both have equally appalling music taste? Or is one of them ridiculously clumsy and the other great at DIY?"

5. Your Words of Wisdom

After you've talked about the merging of two families, this is when you can offer a few words of wisdom and advice to the happy couple.

6. The Toast

The best way to end any father of the bride speech is, of course, with a wedding toast ! Whether it's funny, poignant, light-hearted or deep, getting everyone to raise a toast to the happy couple is the best ending to any father of the bride speech. 

Heidi explains, "The conclusion of the speech should reiterate your pride and love for your daughter, and share your hopes for the couple’s marriage. It’s no longer necessary to offer the newlyweds ‘marriage advice’ per se, but many dads still opt to; sometimes the advice is humorous and naughty, sometimes it's meaningful and heartfelt.

"A father’s toast at the end of the speech should be directed towards the newlyweds. The style is up to you, but we are seeing many fathers increasingly opting for a more personal sentiment over the traditional ‘health and happiness’ option."

Sally Rawlins Photography

Now you have the structure and 'must includes' down, it's time to start putting pen to paper.

But how do you write a cracking father of the bride speech? Heidi shares her insight on the biggest do's, and her top tips on how to write a father of the bride speech to be proud of. 

1. Do: Give Yourself Plenty of Time

Start thinking about your speech  at least a couple of months before the wedding date. 

2. Do: Crowdsource Stories & Ideas

You don't have to do this alone! Pick the brains of the rest of the rest of your family when it comes to thinking about stories or anecdotes. Ask people for their funniest and fondest memories of your daughter - siblings are great for intel.

3. Do: Choose a Narrative

Once you have all of the material together, see if there's a theme that links multiple stories together. Is she always right? Or remarkably clumsy? Or so devoted to her pups, you couldn't believe it when she found a human she liked as much?

Having a strong narrative is a great way of ensuring your speech has depth, and isn't just a list of unlinked observations.

4. Do: Be Ruthless

When you've got everything written down, go through your speech and edit it. We usually recommend people cut down their speech by about a third. Be ruthless. A speech is  always better when it's punchy and has pace to it. 

5. Do: Test it Out & Rehearse

Once you've made edits, test the speech out on your partner or someone you trust to give  honest feedback - that's the key here. You want someone who will tell you the truth - if they don't get a joke about your daughter, no one else in the room will, so take on any advice they give. 

Ensure you have at least a couple of weeks ahead of the big day to memorise your speech and feel confident in your delivery.

We always try and encourage our fathers to try and memorise the speech so they feel comfortable with the flow on the day, and use their notes as a reference as opposed to reading directly from them. 

6. Do: Smile!

It sounds so simple, but looking happy while you deliver your father of the bride wedding speech makes  all the difference. Ensure you make eye contact with the guests on the day and smile throughout - it's literally infectious. 

7. Don't: Use Common Wedding Jokes

Whilst all speeches need humour and a few jokes, please avoid the tired, old (and  really common) wedding jokes and googled gags. They will only result in groans or sympathy laughs, and that's not what you want.

If in doubt, remember the phrase, "It's funny because it's true," and use that when you're writing any jokes.

Think about your daughter at her naughtiest. What were her embarrassing habits as a child? Which of those  still happen to her as an adult? Any guilty pleasures she  should have grown out of, but absolutely hasn't?

8. Don't: Use Crude Language

On that note, when writing jokes or including humour in your father of the bride speech, avoid anything crude or inappropriate that could cause people in the room, specifically your daughter, to be embarrassed.

No exes. No mention of things you know she'd rather you didn't share. If it's the kind of story she'd kick you under the table for at a dinner party, it's definitely not wedding-appropriate. 

And that goes for money as well - it's better to not talk too much about finances. 

9. Don't: Tell Her Life Story

Of course, you love your daughter, and you probably have hundreds of stories and memories you'd like to share, but many dads make the mistake of trying to chronicle their daughter's entire life story and every achievement that's ever occurred into the speech, and it's really not necessary. 

Yes, you want your guests to get the sense of what a wonderful person she is, but no one needs to know that she played Annie in her Year 6 play - unless there's a funny story in there, of course. 

10. Don't: Let it Drag On

For the stories you are including, make sure they aren't too complicated and don't go on for too long. Much like the length of your speech, no one has ever listened to a story and thought, "God, I wish that went on for longer!"

If your stories are too complicated and long-winded, you'll lose the room. Land the plane, quickly and with a punch.

The length of your father of the bride speech absolutely matters and how long yours is will depend on how confident of a speaker you are, how many speeches are being made, and the timing of the day. But for a guide, Heidi advises on the perfect length and how to measure it.

She says, "When it comes to speeches, size matters. All speeches should be delivered within ten minutes, and that includes pauses for laughter.

"Generally, a father of the bride should aim for eight minutes or around 1,000 words. I'd say the maximum it should be is 1,300 words, but that's for a speech that's pacey and funny to justify the additional length."

11. Don't: Get Negative

Hopefully you're in a situation where you are really pleased with who your daughter has chosen to marry, but if for any reason you aren't, and you don't  completely approve - do, not, mention, it. At all!

Your father of the bride speech is not the time to suggest anything other than overwhelming happiness for your daughter's choices. It also isn't a roast of their new partner, so play nice, please. 

12. Don't: Be Generic

The biggest mistake you can make when writing your father of the bride speech is not making it unique to your daughter, and resorting to clichés and googled anecdotes and jokes.

Once you've written it down, read back through your speech and ask yourself how many lines could be said by another father - and get rid of any that could.

Make it personal - every baby doesn't sleep through the night and poos a lot, so think of things that are unique to her. 

Leslie Choucard Photography

Here’s some examples of simple, real father of the bride speeches from our father of the bride speech section that can inspire you.

As you already know, we're not about a 'copy and paste' job when it comes to writing a father of the bride speech, but there is nothing wrong with using father of the bride speech examples to inspire you. You can even use these as templates to build your own speech from.

A lot of father of the bride speeches and examples will refer to a bride and groom, but you can alter the references to your daughter's partner if you are giving a speech at a LGBTQ+ wedding.

1. Sweet Father of the Bride Speech Example

This father of the bride gave a sweet speech about his daughter Leah and her new partner, explaining how proud he and Leah's mum were of her life choices and welcoming her new partner to the family. 

Welcome! To the family and friends, and friends that I’ve yet to meet. 

For those of you that don’t know me, I am the very proud father of this beautiful bride, Leah. As the father of the bride, I have the dubious pleasure of making the first speech: I am therefore the warm-up act for the star speakers – the groom, Clive and best man, Tim. 

Your mum and I are aware of just how blessed we’ve been to have you in our lives Leah. It has been an absolute joy to watch a very talkative and extremely inquisitive little girl blossom into the very beautiful, clever, compassionate and extremely loving young lady that I had the privilege of walking down the aisle today.

Leah has been like a ray of sunshine since the day she was born. Now, as she begins married life, Clive will be whom she will turn to for love and protection. And I know, that she knows, her mum and dad will always be there for her, too.

You often wonder as a parent just how your children will turn out. You wonder what sort of life decisions they will make, especially those that you have no control over. What friends will they choose, who they'll pick as a partner to share their life with. Will that person love and care for them as well as you would? Will you approve?

Well for what it’s worth Leah, your Mum and I think you have made an excellent choice in Clive!

I was honoured when Clive approached me to ask for Leah’s hand in marriage, but I wasn’t at all surprised. Today they are embarking on their greatest adventure together, and it gives me much pleasure to be here with them. I’m very happy to formally welcome Clive into our family today. He’s become like a son to us and he’s an absolute credit to you, Jane and John.

Leah, there is so much more I’d like to say about you. But I believe that my time is up. You look incredible today. You are a beautiful woman and a wonderful daughter. You have married a terrific man. And you will make a perfect wife. I won’t bore you with lengthy pieces of paternal advice, regarding marriage and life together, as I understand your hens have already done that for you.

So here's my piece: This world is entirely yours, and it is only you who will determine its rules. I am sure that you will build a reliable family home, your safe haven where you’ll feel at ease, which will give you strength to withstand the storms and challenges of life ahead. On this journey, let me wish you only love and good fortune.

You can read the full speech here .

2. Traditional Father of the Bride Speech Example

When making a gesture to your daughter's new partner, a sweet story about them is a lovely way to show your appreciation for them. This father of the bride decided to share the story of his daughter's partner asking for her hand in marriage, a tradition they decided to celebrate. 

Hello everyone.  First of all, thank you so much for joining us tonight to celebrate [bride] and [groom] wedding.

Before I offer a toast to these newlyweds please allow me to say a few words about these two special people.

I'll start with the groom.  Kim and I have known [groom] for a few years now.  In our short time together we've been able to witness and appreciate many of his great qualities.  We've learned that he's thoughtful and good natured.  He's creative, industrious, and tackles projects with an artistic flair.

But better yet we've learned that [groom] has strong character.  For example, 18 months ago [groom] came to our house and asked permission to marry [bride]. While Kim and I were anticipating an engagement…asking permission demonstrated a level of character that you don't see every day.

It was a very special moment for us, and it really tested our capacity to keep a secret.  But best of all during our time together, Kim and I have learned that [groom] is the one for [bride].  This not based on one single thing, but on the many little things.

I think anyone who has spent any time with this couple would agree they connect in a special way.  And for these reasons, and the many more to come, we are delighted to call [groom] family today.

3. Funny Father of the Bride Speech Example

Adding just the right amount of humour to your father of the bride speech is guaranteed to go down well. It doesn't have to feel like a stand-up comedy routine, but a few jokes here and there can really bring it to live. This father of the bride did just that with his speech. 

Hello, for those of you who do not know me, I am Gillian's dad, Charlie.

As the father of the bride it's my privilege to give the first speech and, as I get to go first, you will have nothing to compare it to, so look to me at the warm up act for Kenny and David. This is an important day for my wife Lesley and I, a special day, when we officially welcome Kenny into our family.

Our welcome to him is not forced or a hardship, but something that we are happy to do, as we have known Kenny for so long now that it would have been sad if he didn't become part of our family one day. So today, both Lesley and I are delighted Gillian made it official and he is now one of us.

Time flies by so quickly, it doesn't seem that long ago since Gillian was born, and here I am today speaking or trying to toast her wedding. Gillian is a very caring person and has a lovely warm nature that has given her mother Lesley and I so much joy and happiness over the years, even in spite of her expensive tastes as she was growing up.

I could tell you a thing or two and who knows, later on, when I've had a few drinks I just might - but for now I can give you a small example, like when she used to ask me to upgrade her mobile phone, on what seemed like a weekly basis. So much so that I was sure I was getting a bigger discount from the manufacturers than Carphone Warehouse was.

Every father and mother wishes their daughter the best of luck for the future and worries about her finding the right person, one who will make her happy, cherish, and look after her forever.

During the time we have known Kenny, we have come to realise how special he is to Gillian, how much of a kind, caring, pleasant and genuinely nice man he is and what a great son in law he will be, IF  he finishes my tiling. It's almost a yellow card for you Kenny.

Gillian, you are a very pretty woman and looked stunning in your wedding dress and as you know, your dad tends to state the obvious. Today, you really looked beautiful when I saw you in your wedding dress. You looked like a princess who has now found her prince charming!

I'm not saying Kenny looked like a frog before you kissed him but... Oh no, I see Kenny is starting to go into a bit of a sulk…OK Kenny, you look really handsome and very smart too. Almost but not quite as good looking as Gillian.

Lesley and I will always be there for you if you ever need anything. But I need to clarify something, that by anything, I mean if you both want to talk, not borrow money, because that would be something different and nigh on impossible. It's good to talk but I can only lend you an ear.

And can I just remind you both, that you signed a contract. For richer, for poorer etc, remember? I have witnesses and it's on tape! That, in legal terms, is called good admissible evidence.

Finally, I would like to propose a toast to the happy couple, and know that everyone here will want to join me in wishing this pair a very long, happy, and healthy future together.

4. Sentimental Father of the Bride Speech Example

This father of the bride gave a sentimental toast to both his daughter and her new partner. He used beautiful stories and words to narrate how he felt and we just love the sentiment here. 

Laura, both me and your Mum are both aware of just how blessed we have been to have you in our lives and we hope you know exactly how much we love you and how very proud we are of the lovely young lady you have become.

It has been an absolute joy for both your mum and me to watch a very talkative, extremely inquisitive - and often clumsy - little girl develop into the beautiful, young lady that it was my absolute privilege to escort down the aisle today. After all it doesn't seem all that very long ago that you were dancing around in front of the mirror, hair brush in hand belting out some Spice Girls hit, or was that last week.

I first became aware that Laura had found herself a young man when suddenly our dinner discussions that had been on subjects such as reduction labels, stock levels, queue lengths and the amount of overtime left in the Tesco budget, suddenly became about groceries and a certain young manager by the name of James.

I know that tradition dictates that it is at this point that I am supposed to welcome James today into our family, but the truth is that we have known him for some eight years now and from day one he has always been a member of the family. He's happy to join in with what's going on, an expert in assembling gazebos and an excellent cook when it comes to looking after BBQs. Just not much of a rally driver.

For what it's worth Laura your Mum, Barney and I think you have made a great choice. From the first day we met James he has been an absolute credit to both Tracy and Lee. At this point I can only apologise to both of them for the additional workload that Laura joining their family may cause.

Laura and James, may your marriage be a truly happy one and may you have a long and wonderful life together. It is my very great pleasure to propose the first toast to the happy couple. So could I ask you please be upstanding and raise your glasses to the bride and groom.

You can read the full speech here . 

5. Funny & Heartfelt Father of the Bride Speech Example

This father of the bride speech example has the perfect balance of humour and sentiment, as it touches on funny stories and anecdotes, as well as some more hard-hitting roadblocks the couple have had to navigate through. 

Good afternoon everyone. On behalf of Moira and Ellen and myself, I would like to start by welcoming you all and to thank you for coming here to celebrate this very special, happy occasion, the marriage of our daughter Marie to Stephen.

Every wedding is special, of course. But to see your daughter get married is something else. Marie, our walk down the aisle this afternoon is a memory I shall cherish. You looked absolutely beautiful in your stunning wedding dress.

When the date was set for the wedding I thought that was plenty of time to get my father of the bride speech sorted or maybe just wing it! As you can imagine, that suggestion didn’t go down well. In fact, it should be called mother of the bride speech as Moira kept crossing out things I couldn’t say about Marie to embarrass her.

Growing up, Marie was stubborn and moody, don’t know where she got that from, but always there for friends and family. Always helping around the house, cooking and cleaning – NOT! I know where she got that from.

Marie went to Australia for a year, she left right after her 21st birthday not able to boil an egg, hopefully she has got better Stephen.

After they had been together a while I got a call from Marie, in tears saying she just found out something terrible about Stephen. I calmed her down and that’s when she told the news. Stephen was a Rangers supporter and what should she do. At the time they were in the 3rd division so I told Marie he was probably embarrassed to tell you.

When Stephen asked Marie to move in the first thing she asked was, “Do you have Sky Sports?” He must have thought it was xmas, a girlfriend who will watch footy instead of Corrie. She’s a keeper.

Anyone who knows the two of them and saw them together will know how much in love and how well suited they are, especially when they got the horrible news of Stephen’s cancer.

Stephen gave Marie the option to walk away, but that was never going to happen, as I saw first hand with Marie and Ellen being at his bedside during the chemo how close Marie was to the whole of Stephen's family and him to ours.

You only have to be in their company for a few minutes to realise they are best friends as well as soul mates.

After Stephen got the all clear I invited him to play golf having heard he was a pretty decent junior player, I thought this was a great chance to see how he reacts to me. With only one eye and difficulty hitting all his shots properly he let me win. I thought then “You will do for me”. We haven’t played since, thankfully.

Ladies and gentlemen, family and friends, could you please raise your glass to the bride and groom: Marie and Stephen.

6. Short Father of the Bride Speech Example

This short father of the bride speech example is concise and to the point, proving that you can make a brilliant speech with everything needed inside, without it having to last ages and ages. 

Good afternoon everybody on behalf of Sharon and myself, I would like to start by welcoming you all and to thank you for coming here to celebrate.

Now if you want to get an inkling of what Bex was like as a small child then look no further than her lovely daughter Raina, a child full of energy like Bex and always on the go.

Never sleeping when she should just like Bex, irritating her brother whenever possible like Bex, but always a wonderful happy little soul.

Bex was very talkative as a small child and when she wasn't forming long sentences she would gabble away in a language only known to herself.

You are a wonderful daughter; and have provided us with so much joy and happiness over the years.

It has been a joy for both your mum and me to watch you develop from our gorgeous baby daughter into the very beautiful, clever, compassionate and extremely loving daughter, mother, and now wife, that you have become.

And it was my honour and privilege to escort you down the aisle today.

I know that tradition dictates that it is at this point that I am supposed to welcome Paulo today into our family, but he has been part of it for a while now, with exceptional BBQ's whenever the weather permits, so we have had quite a few this year.

Also I have always thought that Paulo and I have had a mystic connection from the very start.

It seems that we both share a very strong interest in the spirit world.

Two spirits to be precise.

Gin and whiskey.

Together we have quite a substantial collection.

It only remains for me to say – Bexy and Paulo, happy marriages begin when you marry the one you love, and they blossom when you love the one you married.

May your marriage be a truly happy one, and may you have a long and wonderful life together.

Ladies and gentlemen, I have one final very pleasurable responsibility to fulfil.

It is my very great pleasure to propose the first toast to the happy couple. So, could I ask you please to be upstanding and raise your glasses to the Bride and Groom.

7. Father of the Bride Speech Example With Advice

In this father of the bride speech example, the dad gives some really personal, funny and sweet advice to his daughter and her new partner. 

Louisa and Steve not only found and booked this amazing house for their big day they also provided us with the fantastic meal we're all about to enjoy.

In fact, in a welcome break from tradition, today is virtually all courtesy of Steve and Louisa themselves. So thank you both, very much, for your generosity and hard work.

Every wedding is special, of course. But to see your first-born daughter get married is something else.

Louisa, our walk down the aisle this afternoon is a memory I shall cherish: you looked absolutely beautiful in your stunning and elegant wedding dress.

Although to be honest part of me expected to see you in your jeans and Converse and Steve in his purple Warwick University hoodie. That wouldn't have surprised anybody.

Louisa; Mum and I have always been extremely proud of you; and never more so than today. You're clever, independent, modest, thoughtful and fun-loving. What's not to like?

Now, I know what some of you are thinking; how on earth can such a beautiful, intelligent and modest young lady be his daughter? Well she is. It's just that, apart from the ginger gene, she's much more like her mother than she is me…which means she can be a bit secretive at times.

Now, at this point it would be customary to spend a few minutes bragging about the qualities of our new son-in-law…and that would be very easy for me indeed; in fact, I've got two pages of notes here listing Steve's good points and the many reasons why he's a perfect match for our number one daughter. Unfortunately Steve, I can't read your handwriting…

Suffice to say, Ali and I are delighted Steve met Louisa that fateful night; they're obviously a very well suited couple and make each other very happy.

Finally, it was suggested to me that I should sign-off today with my thoughts on what makes for a successful, long and happy marriage. Well, I'm not sure I can put a finger on it, to be honest; and I'm sure it's different for every couple.

In my case, it's been very easy. I've just done exactly what I've been told for the last 36 years and that works for us. Other than that, all I can really offer is some advice to Steve, based on my experience, for a continued happy time living with Louisa:

Always have Louisa on your side in any quiz or board game especially if it involves numbers. Never gloat if, in the unlikely event, Wales should ever beat England at Rugby Union. Most importantly, never, ever, eat the last piece of chocolate without Louisa's permission. More seriously, stay best friends, don't sweat the small stuff, do lots of everything while you both can, have fun and try to laugh every day. I wish you both much love and happiness in your new married life together.

8. Shy Father of the Bride Speech Example

I would like to begin by welcoming you all, and thank you for coming to this very special occasion to celebrate the marriage of my beautiful daughter Jennifer to Christopher

I would like to start by extending a very warm welcome on behalf of my wife Gill and myself to the parents of the groom Don and Sue.

I would also like to thank everyone who has helped in the lead up to the wedding in whatever way possible big or small, you have all played your part to make this day very special.

I would also like to give a huge thank you to the bridesmaids. These occasions don't just happen, they take a lot of thought, time, planning and preparation - y ou have done Jenny and Chris proud. 

Gill and I must also give a big thank you to Rhys the best man, h e's done such a great job so far and t he hardest bit is over Rhys, you got the groom here.

I am a bit nervous today as I am not used to speaking in public, but I am sure we will get by.

Writing this speech was a real worry at first. What do you say, what do you write?

Then it dawned on me, just say it how it is from the heart, s o here is the other copy my wife gill did not get to read or edit.

Every father knows that one day their offspring will find a partner and fly the nest. You worry about that day. Now that day has arrived. No longer am I worried, because Jenny has found and chosen her partner for life.

Your children are very special to you and you never stop worrying about them.

So this is the bit where I get Jenny worried about me embarrassing her.

When Jenny was tiny I remember she had a little knitted boots and a special little walker seat we sat her in.

It was round with casters on the bottom and she used to scoot round the house in it with those little knitted boots on trying to get whatever she wanted be for she could even walk.  So she earned my loving nickname of Scoot Boots.

Then she started to grow up. I remember watching Jenny trying to climb up the stairs on her little wobbly legs struggling on every step. Worried that my little girl might fall I went over to her and said you want some help Scoot. She was just about able to talk at this stage. She said noooo I can do it dad. Just hold this glass of vodka for me.

They grow up so quick don't they.

Well my little Scoot Boots has not flown the nest but has scooted off into another man's arms, the arms of a man she has chosen to help hold love and support her up and down the staircases of life.

Over the time we have got to know Chris we realise how special he is to Jenny. He is a real genuine nice guy who wears his heart on his sleeve and loves and cares for Jenny. They are both so happy together. As a son in law I couldn't have asked for better.

Don and Sue, your son Christopher is an absolute credit to you both.

If I try and put my emotions into words, I cannot express enough how I am the proudest father in the world today. Seeing my daughter all grown up looking so beautiful, happy and radiant is such an amazing sight.

Jenny and Chris I know you will both be very happy and forge a great life together. Enjoy and remember this moment forever. You are amongst people today who love and care about you very much. Gill and I will always be there for you.

Finally I would like to propose a toast to the happy couple, and I know everyone here will want to join me in raising your glasses in a toast to a very long healthy and happy future together.

So, there's your complete guide. Now, if you want to add some extra sentiment to your speech, here's our selection of emotional father of the bride speech quotes and toasts for you to use. 

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Public Speaking Tips & Speech Topics

Father of the Bride Speech [With Outlines and Examples]

Jim Peterson has over 20 years experience on speech writing. He wrote over 300 free speech topic ideas and how-to guides for any kind of public speaking and speech writing assignments at My Speech Class.

You’ll want your speech to strike the perfect tone for the big day. Whether you decide to talk about your daughter’s childhood, how proud you are of the happy couple today, or anything in between, an outline will help make sure your speech is just right. A good outline organizes your speech for you in a step-by-step guide. You’ll get an idea of where you might want to put stories or quotes, and you can easily move things around before drafting the final version.

In this article:

Father of the Bride Speech Examples

Father of the bride speech template.

Once you have the perfect outline in front of you, take some notes. Jot down the stories, jokes, or quotes you might want to include. It’s a good idea to run them by the bridesmaids or other members of the wedding party if you’re not sure what is best to include. Your speech will start to take shape in no time.

The best wedding speeches are those that were outlined ahead of time. Create yours with one of the speech outline examples below, and it will become a memorable part of the wedding.

Traditional Father of the Bride Speeches

This father of the bride speech outline has plenty of room for compliments, advice, and family memories. It also has reminders to mention your affection for the groom and to end with words of wisdom about love or marriage.

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For a nice, traditional speech that falls between 5 and 7 minutes long , follow this outline. You’ll start with a story, end with how proud of her you are, and add your favorite memories with your daughter in the middle.

This outline reminds you to start by introducing yourself and welcoming guests to the celebration. Next, tell some of your favorite memories with the bride, and don’t forget to show the groom some love too. Wrap it all up with a bit of wisdom, and you’ll have a winning, classic speech.

Short Father of the Bride Speeches

There are many weddings where keeping your speech short and simple is the way to go. Use this easy outline to make sure you don’t miss anything important. It covers everything you need in a step-by-step format, from the intro to the parting wisdom and toast.

This outline shows that you don’t need to be on the mic for more than a few minutes to say everything you need. This short, sweet speech template begins with a brief memory of the bride as a child. From there, it transitions into thank-yous and kind words and ends with a quick but heartfelt toast.

Simple Father of the Bride Speeches

The best speeches don’t need to reinvent the wheel. Just follow this outline’s easy four-step format , which you can easily make your own by telling the audience about your unique experiences with your daughter and her new husband.

Try this simple four-part template when writing your father of the bride speech for the wedding day. Don’t forget to add personal touches such as creative storytelling, genuine emotion, and advice from your own life experiences.

With a five-step outline and plenty of advice for how to approach each section, this wedding toast format won’t let you down. The outline has reminders to give credit to those who made the wedding possible, to speak highly of the groom, and to show pride in your daughter on her big day.

Detailed Father of the Bride Speeches

Sometimes, the speech you want to give might be a little more detailed. This template encourages you to write a thoughtful and unique speech for your daughter’s wedding. Relive touching memories, mention any family members who couldn’t be there, and add a quote if you have the perfect one for the occasion.

If you feel you have a lot to say, try this speech outline, which suggests a length of about 7 minutes. This gives you plenty of time to add everything you want to include, such as humor, thank yous, and a shout out to the bride’s mother.

Father of the Groom Speech

The groom’s father also may be asked to give a speech. This simple outline suggests highlighting the bride and groom as individuals before talking about them as a couple. Then end on a classy note with thank-yous and a quote or word of advice.

Ready to Write?

If you’re asked to give a father of the bride speech, it’s important to start drafting the speech well before the big day.

After some brainstorming, it will become more clear which anecdotes or bits of advice are perfect for your speech. Add your content at the appropriate places in the outline you chose. Don’t forget to write down how you will transition between each part of the speech, too.

And remember, you don’t have to read your speech strictly word-for-word at the wedding. A few mistakes or some appropriate improvising can show your most heartfelt emotions!

There’s no need to stress about the speechwriting process. With these outlines in hand, you’re now ready to start creating a lovely, memorable father of the bride speech.

WELCOME AND WISHES

1. Start by telling briefly who you are, not everybody knows that; collegues or friends of the bridal couple or the groom’s family members. Tell how long you know them – there will be something that can serve as icebreaker.

2. Welcome and thank the guests for coming and sharing this day if you are the host and there is no Master of Ceremonies. Especially guests who have come a long distance.

3. Mention humorous incidents this very day so far, and highlight beautiful moments.

4. Wish all a happy day or night.

SPEECH TOPICS ABOUT THE BRIDE

5. Compliment the bride: e.g. say that she is a beautiful, elegant or lovely woman.

6. Tell the guests about your daughter, emphasize very special relationship the two of you have. Talk about your love and pride. Say how much you care about her. Avoid cliches. Talk affectionately. Tease a bit, make funny remarks of her character, job, study, hobbies, passions, skills or achievements. Be a gentleman.

7. Tell some little silly stories about the bride.

8. Reflect on her prewedding years.

9. Tell about how you and your partner saw her growing up.

10. Tell about your hopes for her. Tell how she has surpassed some expectations of you and your partner.

Be gentle when you come up with the ups and especially the downs! E.g. don’t mention previous boyfriends …

11. Conclude this part of your father of the bride speech with telling how proud you are.

YOUR NEW SON IN LAW

12. Tell funny stories about your daughter and the groom.

13. Tell how the groom was introduced for the first time to you. That always work in a father of the bride speech.

14. Tell what your first impressions were. E.g. his looks.

15. Tell about shared interests, your relationship, surprises.

16. Tell what you’ve learned from him.

17. Tell how you see he makes your daughter happy.

18. Tell about his character, job, study, hobbies, passions, skills, achievements.

19. Conclude this chapter of your father of the bride speech with welcoming the groom into your family. Tell that you are delighted he has become a part of your family.

20. Welcome the joining together and the family of your new son in law.

21. Tell you’re looking forward to get to know each other better. Mention something both families have in common.

THANK YOU’S

22. Thank everyone who made this party success, for their generous help.

23. Thank the mother of the newly spouse and the mother of the groom for their efforts in organizing all things.

24. Mention the maids of honor/bridesmaids, say how beautiful they look and thank them for supporting your daughter.

25. Thank the clergyman, clergywoman or minister.

26. Thank anyone (family members and friends) who have helped with the party and reception.

27. Thank the florists by saying everything in the church, the town hall and in this room look wonderful.

28. Thank everybody who made financial contributions. Bring this part of your father of the bride speech with humorous remarks.

29. If your partner has passed away, then speak a few words in her memory. Tell she should say the same warm things. Welcome to the bride and groom on her behalf too. Look forward, this is a happy day!

30. End with a loving toast to their health, success and happiness.

E.g.  Ladies and gentlemen, please be upstanding and raise your glasses, please join me in the traditional toast, I give you… the bride and groom!

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Amazing Tips & Themes For Your Magical Wedding

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How to Write a Father of the Bride Speech + 3 Examples

• Posted by by Rosie Liliy
• Last updated: April 14, 2023

Fathers of the bride have more to do than just hand over the ring at a wedding – they also get to give one of the most significant speeches of their lives.

Giving a father of the bride speech is an incredible honor and a great way to show your appreciation for your daughter on her special day. However, knowing how to write this important speech can be tricky, and the occasion can also be filled with nerves, as the father talks to the microphone in front of a crowd to deliver their speech.

But don’t worry – we’re here to help! This post will provide you with easy tips on how to craft an unforgettable father of the bride speech that will bring joy and tears from everyone in attendance.

Using our tips and examples, you’ll be able to craft an address that expresses your love for your daughter on her special day through celebration, humor and warmth.

Related:   Unforgettable Mother of the Bride Speeches: Writing Tips + Examples

Introduction to the role of the father of the bride

As the father of the bride, you have a special role to play on your daughter’s big day.

Not only are you responsible for walking your daughter down the aisle and giving her away, but you also have the opportunity to deliver a heartfelt and memorable speech at the wedding reception.

Your speech is your chance to express your love and pride for your daughter, and to welcome the groom and his family into your own.

You may also want to share personal anecdotes or memories, and offer words of wisdom or advice for the happy couple.

Tips for writing a memorable and heartfelt speech

Here are some tips to help you craft a memorable and heartfelt speech that will leave everyone in tears (of joy, of course).

Start by brainstorming your main points

What do you want to say to your daughter and son-in-law on their big day? What messages do you want to convey to your guests? It might be helpful to jot down some ideas on paper before you start organizing your speech.

Make it personal

Your speech is a chance to share your own memories and experiences with your daughter and the rest of the wedding party.

Consider including personal anecdotes or special moments that you’ve shared over the years. This will help to make your speech more meaningful and memorable. Bonus points if you can find a way to make everyone laugh!

Keep it concise

While it’s important to include all of your main points, it’s also important to be mindful of your time.

A good rule of thumb is to aim for a speech that’s about 5-7 minutes long. This will give you enough time to say what you need to say without boring your guests (or making them check their phones).

Practice, practice, practice!

The more you practice your speech, the more confident and comfortable you’ll be when it comes time to deliver it.

Practice in front of a mirror, or better yet, have a friend or family member listen to you and give feedback.

And don’t forget to keep a glass of water handy – it’ll help to calm your nerves and keep your throat lubricated.

Structuring your speech: a step-by-step guide

Alright, so you’ve brainstormed your main points and practiced your speech a million times. Now it’s time to put it all together and give the most epic father of the bride speech ever.

Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you structure your speech and keep it on track.

Begin with a greeting. Start off by greeting the guests and thanking them for coming to celebrate your daughter’s special day. You might also want to thank the groom’s parents for raising such an amazing son.

Introduce yourself. If you’re not already well-known to the wedding party, take a moment to introduce yourself and your relationship to the bride.

You could even throw in a little humor here by making a self-deprecating joke about how you’re not sure how you ended up with such an amazing daughter.

Share your memories. This is the perfect opportunity to share some personal anecdotes or special memories that you’ve shared with your daughter over the years. Make everyone laugh (or cry) with a funny or heartwarming story.

Express your love and pride for your daughter. Let your daughter know just how much she means to you, and how proud you are of the person she has become. You might want to get a little sappy here – it is a wedding, after all.

Welcome the groom and his family. Now is the time to extend a warm welcome to the groom and his family, and to express your happiness at their joining together.

You might want to give the groom a little ribbing here by talking about how lucky he is to be marrying into such an amazing family.

Share your hopes and wishes for the future. Finish off your speech by expressing your hopes and wishes for the couple’s future together. This is your chance to get a little sentimental and give some advice on how to have a happy and successful marriage .

Father of the Bride Speech Examples

Example 1: a traditional and emotional father of the bride speech.

Dear friends and family,

I stand before you today as the proud and emotional father of the beautiful bride. My daughter [bride’s name] has grown into an amazing young woman and it brings me immense joy to give her away to the love of her life, [groom’s name].

I still remember the day [bride’s name] was born like it was yesterday. She arrived in this world with a head full of dark hair and the most stunning blue eyes I had ever seen. From the moment I held her in my arms, I knew I would love her with every fiber of my being.

As [bride’s name] grew, I was constantly in awe of her kindness, intelligence, and determination. She has always put others before herself and has a heart of gold. I have no doubt that she will make a wonderful wife to [groom’s name] and an amazing partner in life.

When [groom’s name] entered our lives, I knew immediately he was the perfect match for my daughter. He is loving, caring, and adores [bride’s name] with all his heart. I have no doubt that he will make a wonderful husband and support [bride’s name] in all her endeavors.

I am overjoyed to welcome [groom’s name] and his family into ours and am thrilled to see the love [bride’s name] and [groom’s name] share. I have no doubt they will have a long and happy life together filled with love and laughter.

[Bride’s name], [groom’s name], I am so proud of both of you and wish you all the happiness in the world. May your marriage be a beautiful and blessed union. I love you both with all my heart.

Example 2: A lighthearted and humorous speech

Hello everyone,

As the father of the bride, it is my pleasure to welcome all of you to this joyous occasion. And let me just say, I am so relieved that [bride’s name] has finally found someone willing to put up with her stubbornness and her love of always being right.

But seriously, I am truly blessed to have a daughter like [bride’s name]. She has always been there for me and I am grateful to have her in my life. She has brought so much joy and love into my life, and I am so proud of the person she has become.

[Groom’s name], you are one lucky guy. Not only do you get to marry the love of your life, but you also get to join our crazy family. Just be prepared for late night game nights and impromptu dance parties. You’ll fit right in, I have no doubt.

But seriously, I am overjoyed to see the love [bride’s name] and [groom’s name] share and have no doubt they will have a long and happy marriage. I have no doubt that [groom’s name] will always be there for [bride’s name] and support her in all her endeavors.

So let’s raise a glass to the happy couple – may your love continue to grow and thrive for many years to come. I am so grateful to be a part of this special day and wish you both all the happiness in the world. Cheers!

Example 3: A personalized and sentimental speech

It is an honor and a privilege to stand here today as the father of the bride. My daughter, [bride’s name], has always been the light of my life and it brings me great joy to see her marrying the man of her dreams, [groom’s name].

[Groom’s name], you are a truly special person and I am grateful you have come into our lives. Your love for [bride’s name] is evident in everything you do and I have no doubt you will be a wonderful husband to her. I am so happy to welcome you into our family and know that you and [bride’s name] will have a long and happy marriage.

[Bride’s name], from the moment you were born, you have brought so much love and joy into my life. I am so proud of the person you have become and am grateful to be a part of this special day. Watching you grow into the amazing woman you are today has been one of the greatest joys of my life.

One of my favorite memories with [bride’s name] is the summer we spent traveling through Europe together. It was a wonderful opportunity for us to bond and make lasting memories. We visited so many incredible places, but my favorite was the week we spent in Italy. The food, the culture, the history – it was all just incredible. And while we may have gotten lost a few times and had to navigate some difficult language barriers, it was all worth it to spend that quality time with my daughter.

[Groom’s name], I know you and [bride’s name] will create many more special memories together in the years to come. I am confident you will always be there for each other, through the good times and the bad. You are the perfect match for each other and I am so excited to see what the future holds for you both.

So let’s raise a glass to the happy couple. [Bride’s name] and [groom’s name], may your love continue to grow and thrive as you embark on this new journey together. I love you both with all my heart.

Frequently Asked Questions

How can i make my speech memorable.

A: The key to a memorable speech is to be yourself and let your love and pride for your daughter shine through in your words.

Consider including personal anecdotes or special memories that you’ve shared with your daughter over the years. This will help to make your speech more meaningful and memorable.

Incorporating a little bit of humor can also go a long way in making your speech stand out.

What should I avoid in my speech?

A: First and foremost, try to avoid using any offensive language or telling inappropriate jokes. This is a family-friendly occasion, after all!

It’s also a good idea to steer clear of any sensitive topics or controversial issues. You want to keep the mood light and celebratory, not heavy or divisive.

Finally, try to avoid getting too long-winded or going off on tangents. It’s important to stay focused and on-topic to keep your speech engaging and enjoyable for your listeners.

Keep these things in mind and you’ll be well on your way to delivering a smooth and memorable speech.

When does the father of the bride give his speech?

A: The father of the bride’s speech is typically given at the wedding reception, after the meal has been served but before the dancing begins. It is usually given before the best man’s speech and the groom’s speech.

Conclusion: keys to a successful father of the bride speech

The father of the bride speech is a special and important moment on your daughter’s big day. By following the tips and guidelines outlined in this post, and taking inspiration from the examples provided, you can craft a heartfelt and memorable speech that will be remembered for years to come.

Remember to keep it personal, incorporate humor and personal anecdotes, and practice beforehand to ensure that you deliver your speech with confidence and poise. Above all, let your love and pride for your daughter shine through in your words.

Congratulations to the happy couple, and we wish them a lifetime of love and happiness.

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Rosie Liliy

Hey there, lovely couples and fellow wedding fanatics! I’m Rosie, the managing editor at Magical Day Weddings, and I’m here to make your wedding planning journey a blast! As a lifelong lover of weddings, I’ve dabbled in everything from DIY decor to event planning. I believe that every love story deserves to be told in a way that captures its essence. From heartwarming vows to tear-jerking speeches, I’m here to help you create unforgettable memories on your journey to “I do!”

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A Memorable Father-Of-The Bride Speech: Tips, Tricks, And Examples

We know you’re nervous about making a father-of-the-bride speech at your little girl’s wedding. We won’t mince words here. You should be. 

This is why you’re probably furiously Googling “father of the bride speech examples,” so someone will tell you what to say. 

Make it funny, but short. Make it moving, but not too personal. 

Your job is to make everyone laugh and cry tears of joy. As the head honcho of your household (ok, second to your wife), it falls on your head to get it right, or you’ll ruin everything. 

All of that is hooey, of course, but you probably feel that way all the same. 

We want to help, so we’ve put together a father-of-the-bride speech outline to help you decide what to say and remember when to say it. 

Step Four: Practice

Simple father of the bride speech template, step one: know the rules and etiquette.

Before you get to writing, there are some basic speech rules and etiquette you should consider to avoid disaster and embarrassment. 

• Do Your Homework

Call in the cavalry. There are no rules that say your speech can’t be a collaborative effort. If you’re unsure what to talk about, ask those who know her best for stories and anecdotes. 

Find out who’s invited that you may not know so well. It helps to keep in mind who your audience will be. 

• Watch Your Time

Seven. Minutes. That’s the maximum time a father-of-the-bride speech ought to last. Anything more prolonged, and you’ll lose them. If you can, aim for six. 

• No Cliches, Find Ways To Be Unique

Talk about the qualities your daughter has that set her apart. Of course she’s brilliant and talented and beautiful. Anyone who knows her knows that. 

Avoid a resume-like list of her career or education, unless you can link that to a funny story or something that pertains to her new husband.

• Avoid Talking About Money, Religion, Or Politics

Just like at dinner parties (because let’s face it, that’s kind of what a wedding reception is), the rule is to avoid talking politics, religion, or money. 

Of course, it’s entirely appropriate to thank God and, by all means, prayers up. But use good judgment and keep it PC. 

• Keep It Clean

We probably don’t have to mention it, but we will anyway. Nothing will suck the air out of the room like a tasteless joke or inappropriate anecdote from Dad. Gross. 

• Aim For Funny, But Avoid Inside Jokes

Yes, you want to be funny, that’s a given. Remember, you are the master of the Dad Joke. Work it. Just avoid inside jokes, it may alienate some of the guests. 

• Don’t Get Too Emotional, Keep It Light

Just like you want to make ’em laugh, making your audience tear up is gratifying, too. But make sure you don’t go overboard and make it awkward. 

• Keep Your Family Strife Out Of It

It’s unbelievable how often people give speeches like this and veer off onto a tangent about family quarrels. 

If you and your daughter’s mother are no longer together and aren’t on the best of terms, keep it out of the speech. If you and her mother’s new significant other don’t get along, now is not the time. 

If someone’s not speaking to Aunt Tilly or the bride’s cousin ruined another family wedding by getting drunk and hitting on the groom’s mother: Do. Not. Make it a thing. 

Seems like common sense, but people are mysterious creatures.

Step Two: Brainstorm

Crafting an unforgettable father of the bride speech requires a bit of preparation, and the most important part of that preparation is brainstorming your ideas and outlining your speech. Here are some tips to get you started:

• Find your Voice

Every father has a unique personality and relationship with his daughter. While it can be tempting to emulate speeches found online, it is essential to infuse your own authentic voice and personal anecdotes into your address.

• Think of personal anecdotes

Reflect on your relationship with both the bride and groom, and write down any memories, jokes, or stories that you think would be relevant or entertaining.

• Consider the structure of your speech

Your speech should have an introduction, a body, and a conclusion. The introduction should capture the audience’s attention and set the tone for the rest of your speech. The body should be divided into several sections, each highlighting a different aspect of your relationship with the bride and groom. The conclusion should tie everything together and leave a lasting impression..

Step Three: Make An Outline

OK, with etiquette out of the way (but not out of mind), it’s time to get down to the nitty-gritty — the fun part! When you make your outline, by all means, write it all on cue cards and use them. Whatever you need to keep focused.

• Opening Line/Introduce Yourself 

Every good speech needs an opener, but it doesn’t have to be stand-up material. A quick introduction and welcoming the guests will do nicely. 

• Thank Your Wife, The Groom’s Parents, The Officiant, etc.

This is another part you can get through quickly. It’ll be tempting to spend a lot of time on this one, but keep in mind that you can thank everyone more thoroughly and one-on-one throughout the reception. 

Unless there’s something particular you feel the need to say, a quick thanks will do. 

• Share A Story Or Two and Don’t Forget The Groom

The moment everyone’s been waiting for: dad making fun of his daughter and her new husband. Gently, of course.

Seriously, though, this is the time to be funny. Mention the first time you met your new son-in-law and what you thought of him (if it’s not seriously negative). Talk about funny things from her childhood, as long as they’re not mortifyingly embarrassing.

The material for this part is rich, mine it. 

• Impart Some Fatherly Wisdom

So you’ve made them laugh, now make them say “awwwww.”

Pass on what you’ve learned about life, love, and happiness – things that worked for you, and maybe things that didn’t work so well if you can keep it light. 

If there’s a deceased family member that your daughter was particularly fond of, now is an excellent time to hand down any wisdom they imparted to you. 

• Raise A Toast 

The toast can stay short and sweet, all you have to do now is invite everyone to raise a glass to the newlywed’s happiness. Done and done. 

When it comes to giving a memorable father of the bride speech, practice is key. You don’t want to be reading from a script or stumble over your words on such an important occasion. Here are some tips to help you practice and deliver your speech with confidence:

• Write out your speech

Before you begin to practice, make sure that you have a draft of your speech. It does not have to be perfect at this stage, but it should have all the key points that you want to make. Writing out your speech will help you organize your thoughts and ensure that you have covered all the necessary elements.

• Practice in front of a mirror

Practicing in front of a mirror allows you to see your facial expressions and gestures. It also helps you to work on your eye contact and body language, which are important when delivering a speech.

• Record yourself

Another way to practice is to record yourself giving the speech. This allows you to listen to your tone of voice, pacing, and areas that need improvement.

• Get feedback

Ask a trusted friend or family member to listen to your speech and give you feedback. They can offer suggestions on delivery, pacing, and content.

• Practice in the wedding venue

If possible, practice your speech in the actual wedding venue. This will give you a sense of the acoustics and how your voice will carry. It also helps you visualize the setting, which can help calm nerves and build confidence.

Remember, the more you practice, the more comfortable and confident you will be when delivering your father of the bride speech. Trust in yourself and your message, and enjoy the moment.

Father-Of-The-Bride Speech Examples 

If this whole speech thing has been on your mind (obviously it has. otherwise, you wouldn’t be reading this), you’ll probably want an example or two for how to do it like a boss. 

Prepare to get educated…

BEST Father-of-the-Bride Speech. Ever. (According to the person who uploaded the Youtube video)

We love the way he includes the groom the whole way through, and his toast is perfect.

You’ll notice this guy incorporates money and religion in his speech and manages to make it not at all awkward, but fabulous. Shows how bendable the rules can be if you’re on your game…

Heartwarming Father-of-the-Bride Speech (Get Out the Hankie!)

This father offers up a funny and heartwarming speech, along with a few props that take this speech to another level.

Hilarious Father-of-the-Bride Speech That Includes the Groom’s Family 

He’s included the groom’s family in this speech in the best way ever. Not to mention the hilarity of his son-in-law story! We’re dyin’ over here!

Some Parting Advice

The speeches are arguably the best part of the reception, next to the open bar and dancing. Ahem.

Although it may feel like it, no one expects the world from the father-of-the-bride when he toasts the happy couple. 

It’s your job to be sincere, remind everyone of what makes your daughter so wonderful, and tell the room why you’re thrilled to gain a son-in-law. 

Do that, and the rest will fall into place. Next thing you know you’ll be grabbing a martini, loosening your tie and breathing a sigh of relief that you nailed that speech. Now to nail those dance moves you’ve been practicing!

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30 Best Father of the Bride Speeches – The Ultimate Guide

The father of the bride speech is an integral part of any wedding day. You get to share memories and talk about your daughter in a way she has never heard you express. You get to be the star of the show for a split second, so you better make it perfect.

You can use this speech as an opportunity to congratulate the happy couple, thank guests for coming, share advice with your daughter and give people a few laughs — all while making sure they know how much it means to have them there in person on one of the most important days of her life.

How Long Should a Father of the Bride Speech Last?

Most people want to know the appropriate length for such an important moment in their lives. You can’t just wing it! There has to be some guidance on what you should do when giving your speech at such an important event as your daughter’s wedding.

So how long should your father of the bride speech last? It depends on several factors:

• How much time do you have? 
• How emotional do you get? 
• What do you plan on saying?

We suggest keeping it under 3 minutes.

You also shouldn’t miss these other fascinating articles:

• Quotes To Wish Your Parents A Happy Wedding Anniversary
• Songs For Parents Entrance At Wedding Receptions
• Wedding Gift Ideas for Parents

10 Ways to Begin Your Father of the Bride Speech

How do you begin this momentous speech? Here are some opening suggestions:

“Hello. Is everyone having a good time? [allow for applause] I am [bride’s name]’s father. There’s a saying that when children finally find true love, their parents find true joy.” “When my wife and I discovered that we would have a little girl, we were excited beyond belief.” “Today is only the beginning for [bride’s name] and [partner’s name].” “For as long as we both can remember, which is quite a while if you look at all my gray hair, [bride’s name]’s mom and I knew that [bride’s name] was destined for great things.” “As a parent, the greatest thing you’ll ever have is the gift of your children. I always wanted all my children to be the happiest they could be.” “Welcome! My name is [your name], and I’m delighted you could make it to [bride’s name]’s wedding. My wife and I have been waiting for our daughter to find a nice boy for years, so today is an especially happy day for us.” “I’m [your name], [bride’s name]’s proud dad and [partner’s name]’s brand new father-in-law.” “Hi everyone, I struggled a bit with writing this speech because my daughter, the lovely bride, and my wife gave me the opposite advice.” “The couple has requested that I refrain from sharing any embarrassing stories… so that’s it from me! Thanks for listening!” “Hi, everyone! I’m [your name], and it’s time to give the speech I frantically scribbled down on this napkin 15 minutes ago!”

If none of these seem perfect for your daughter, we suggest checking out Pinterest or asking family and friends for help with a funny but sweet opener.

10 Toast Ideas for Your Daughter’s Wedding

This is a time to reflect on how wonderful it is to be involved in such an important event and how happy you are for the newlyweds. Here are some toast ideas:

“Finally, it’s my great pleasure to invite you all to stand and raise your glasses high in a toast to our wonderful newlyweds, [bride’s name] and [partner’s name]!” “Please stand with me, if you’re able, and raise your glasses to toast the new happy couple.” “Let’s raise our glasses high to a long life filled with happiness, love and joyous occasions for both of them for years to come.” “Please join my wife and I as we raise our glasses to the beautiful, kind and loving couple. We welcome you, [partner’s name], to our family and look forward to many years of happy memories.” “I offer a toast to my lovely daughter and her partner, [partner’s name]. May the happiness they feel today last forever or at least as long as it takes me to pay off this wedding.” “May your love be longer than the bill from tonight.” “May you have warm words on a cold evening around the fire, a full moon on a dark night to light your way and a road downhill to your door for easy travels wherever you may go.” “To the newlyweds, we wish you health, we wish you happiness, we wish you wealth — and we wish you everything else we have always wanted for you.” “May the joys you share today on your wedding day be the beginning of a lifetime of great happiness and fulfillment together.” “May you have love, health and wealth, but most importantly, may you have the time to enjoy them all together as a happily married couple.”

10 Humorous Father of the Bride Speech and Toast Ideas

If you’re known as the funny father, you might want to try to incorporate your love of laughter and sense of humor into your speech/toast at your daughter’s wedding. Here are a few examples that we love:

“Apparently, women subconsciously choose a new partner with characteristics furthest from that of their dear fathers. And only a few minutes ago, at cocktail hour, I heard my dear wife describing her new [son or daughter]-in-law as generous, sincere and good-humored.” “To my new [son or daughter]-in-law, I’ll give you some useful advice: forget your wedding anniversary once and you’ll remember it for the rest of your life!” “[Partner’s name], if you remember that this marriage is just a union in which one person, my daughter, is always right, and the other is you, you’ll be fine.” “Hello all, I’m [your name]. I hope you know who I am by now, but if you don’t, well done for sneaking into such an expensive meal unnoticed.” “I want to really enjoy the next five minutes of tonight that [bride’s name] couldn’t plan and has no control over!” “Funny, passionate, intelligent, hardworking, kind and good-looking. My daughter [bride’s name] definitely gets all those traits from me!” “Today is a special day, a day beyond measure — you’re about to witness the very first and last time anyone trusts me to make a speech.” “The last time I stood up in front of a crowd with a microphone in my hand, I was belting out a drunken version of [your favorite song].”  “[Bride] has always brightened our lives — she never remembered to turn off any lights and drove up our energy bills.” “They say marriage is like a fine wine; it keeps getting better and sweeter with age so long as you put a cork in it!”

Remember These Things When Making Your Speech

You’re nervous and that’s okay. But here are the only two things you need to remember: 

1. Be yourself

Every relationship is different and every father-daughter connection is unique. Your relationship with your daughter has its own special story. 

2. Be honest in your speech

Nothing will ruin a wedding more than an overly sentimental speech full of clichés or untruths (or both). You are giving this speech because she loves you and you love her.

3. Introduce yourself –

It is always polite to begin your speech with a brief introduction. Unlike in her childhood, your daughter may not have brought home all her friends throughout college and her professional life and most of them may not be familiar with you. Besides, at least half of the people in attendance are there for the groom and like have no idea who you are. Despite how obvious the walking down the aisle may be, there’s no harm in a formal introduction to the guests.

4. Throw in some memories

Besides the mother of the bride, you are probably the only person in the room that has known your daughter her entire life. It’s okay to reminisce on memories of your daughter’s childhood that have stuck with you. If you can bring in a sweet memory that involves your son-in-law, even better!

5.  Steer clear of the embarrassing stuff

We understand wanting to garner some laughs from the guests, however, this should never be at the expense of the bride. Teenage shenanigans, past relationships, and other stories that could embarrass your daughter should be avoided. While the memories may be funny amongst family members, they may not sell as well in front of colleagues and other people that do not know her well.

6. Express pride

Most dads want to be able to see their daughters grow up, achieve their dreams, and settle down with a great guy. As a father seeing this happen for your baby girl is a huge emotion. Feel free to express this by speaking of her character and how proud you are of how far she has come.

7. Jokes aside

The depiction of wedding speeches in the movies may have led us to believe that it’s always laugh after laugh. Truth is, you are not a comedian and no one expects a stand-up show. It’s okay to throw in a few jokes here and there however, the most important thing is to share in the joy of your daughter.

8.  Acknowledge the groom

It’s tempting to go on and on about your daughter for the entire speech but the truth is; your daughter is now part of a team. Take this time to thank your son-in-law for making your daughter happy and welcome him to the family.

9. Drop a few words of wisdom

Both your daughter and son-in-law are stepping into a new and untrodden chapter of their lives. Feel free to share your wisdom and lessons you have learned throughout your life that will help them take on any challenges they face together.

10. Sign off with a blessing

The wedding is well on its way because you gave your blessing, however,  bestowing blessings, and good luck on the newlyweds is always welcome.

Final Thoughts

Make sure that no matter what tone you choose for your speech, you welcome your daughter’s partner and their family to your family. Thank them for coming and say how happy you are that they are part of your family now.

We hope you enjoyed this list of great father-of-the-bride speeches. Planning a wedding is a lot of work, but it can also be a lot of fun. It’s important to take some time and enjoy yourself before the big day arrives. You deserve it!

For even more father-of-the-bride speech ideas, check out this site .

As a multi-passionate creative and a self-proclaimed frequent flyer of weddings, Kiara combines her love for the wedding industry and experience as a professional wedding photographer with her writing abilities to share tips, tricks, and helpful information with couples. She is the owner of Switech Studios a popular wedding photography business. With tons of insider information from behind her camera lens on how to have the best wedding possible, Kiara’s in-depth knowledge is sure to put you on the road to wedding planning success.

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Father of the Bride Speech Examples and Templates

by Ryan Hart | Updated on September 21, 2023 | Post may contain affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases.

When it comes to a wedding, one of the most anticipated speeches is the father of the bride’s.

It’s a moment for the father to express his love and pride for his daughter, offer advice and well wishes for the newlyweds, and thank everyone for being a part of this special day.

But for many fathers, the idea of giving a speech can be intimidating . You want to make sure you come across as confident, clear, and knowledgeable, but where do you start?

Brainstorming and planning ahead can help you organize your thoughts and ensure you hit all the key elements. From there, you can start writing and incorporating techniques to make your speech stand out.

What should you say in a Father of the Bride speech?

When it comes to delivering a memorable father of the bride speech, there are several key elements that you should incorporate. These elements will help you to create a speech that is heartfelt, emotional, and memorable for all the right reasons.

Introduce Yourself

Firstly, it’s important to introduce yourself and welcome the guests . This will help to set the tone for your speech and make everyone feel at ease. You can also take this opportunity to thank the guests for coming and for their support.

Share a Short Story

Next, it’s time to share stories and memories about your daughter. This is the perfect opportunity to reminisce about happy times and to highlight the qualities that make your daughter so special. You can also use this time to welcome your new son-in-law or daughter-in-law and to express your happiness for the happy couple.

Offer Words of Wisdom

It’s also important to offer some words of wisdom and marriage advice. This can be done in a concise and meaningful way, and can include quotes or anecdotes that have special meaning to you and your family. You can also share your hopes and wishes for the future of the couple.

End with a Toast

Of course, no father of the bride speech would be complete without a toast. Raise a toast to the happy couple and their future together, and share your pride and joy in their union. You can also take this opportunity to thank the maid of honor and the master of ceremonies for their contributions to the wedding.

Examples and Templates

When it comes to writing your father of the bride speech, having some examples and templates to draw inspiration from can be incredibly helpful. Here are a few resources to get you started:

"Ladies and gentlemen, I stand here as a proud father to [DAUGHTER'S NAME] . It feels like just yesterday that she was [SHARE A MEMORABLE CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCE] . Today, I can hardly believe she's marrying [GROOM'S NAME] , a man who [POSITIVE TRAIT OR ANECDOTE ABOUT GROOM] . As I raise my glass, I want to thank everyone for being here to celebrate this special day with us. To the happy couple, may your future be filled with love and joy."

"When [DAUGHTER'S NAME] was little, we used to [A SHARED ACTIVITY OR STORY] . Now as I watch her with [GROOM'S NAME] , I see a similar bond of [SHARED QUALITY] . I could not be happier for them. So here's to my beautiful daughter and her wonderful new husband. May your love continue to grow stronger with each passing day. Cheers!"

"As a father, you dream of the day your little girl finds someone who [VALUES OR QUALITIES YOU HOPED FOR] . Today, [DAUGHTER'S NAME] married [GROOM'S NAME] , a man who embodies all of these qualities. To my daughter and her new husband, I wish you a lifetime of happiness and love. May your marriage be as strong and beautiful as the love you share today."

"They say a father is his daughter's first love. Well, [DAUGHTER'S NAME] was my first true love. Seeing her today with [GROOM'S NAME] , I know she's found her [TERM OF ENDEARMENT: e.g. forever love, true match] . As I look at my daughter and her new husband, I am filled with pride and joy. Here's to a lifetime of love, laughter, and happiness. Cheers!"

"Raising [DAUGHTER'S NAME] has been my life's greatest joy. She's [POSITIVE QUALITIES OR TRAITS] . Today, as she marries [GROOM'S NAME] , I see those qualities reflected back at her, and it fills my heart with joy. To the newlyweds, may your love for each other only grow stronger with each passing year. Here's to a lifetime of happiness and joy together."

"I always knew [DAUGHTER'S NAME] would grow up to be [QUALITY, ACHIEVEMENT, OR TRAIT] . I am proud to say that [GROOM'S NAME] is the kind of man who values that about her. As a father, there is no greater joy than seeing my daughter so happy. To my daughter and her new husband, may your love for each other never fade. Cheers!"

"There are many moments in a father's life that he cherishes, but this moment, seeing [DAUGHTER'S NAME] marrying a man who is [POSITIVE TRAITS OF GROOM] , is truly special. To my beautiful daughter and her handsome husband, may your love story be filled with adventure, laughter, and endless joy. Congratulations and cheers to a lifetime of happiness together."

"As [DAUGHTER'S NAME] 's father, I've seen her grow and accomplish so much. Her marriage to [GROOM'S NAME] , a man who [COMPLIMENT ABOUT GROOM] , is another proud moment in a long list. As I raise my glass, I want to thank my daughter and her new husband for giving me the greatest gift of all - the gift of seeing my little girl so happy. Here's to a lifetime of love and joy together."

" [DAUGHTER'S NAME] has always been the [ADJECTIVE: e.g. light, star] of our family. Today, as she joins hands with [GROOM'S NAME] , I know she has found her perfect [COMPLEMENT TO PREVIOUS ADJECTIVE: e.g., beacon, constellation] . To my daughter and her new husband, may your love for each other be as strong and unbreakable as the bond between a father and his daughter. Cheers to a lifetime of happiness together."

" [DAUGHTER'S NAME] , from your first steps, to this walk down the aisle, I've had the privilege of being there. Now, as you step into a new journey with [GROOM'S NAME] , a man who [POSITIVE TRAIT OR QUALITY OF GROOM] , I know you will make beautiful memories together. As I look at my daughter and her new husband, I am filled with hope and happiness for their future together. To the happy couple, may your marriage be blessed with love, joy, and endless happiness. Cheers!"

Understanding the Role

As the father of the bride, you have a special role to play in your daughter’s wedding. Your speech is one of the most anticipated and memorable moments of the wedding reception, and it’s an opportunity to express your love and pride for your daughter and your new son-in-law.

Your speech should be heartfelt, sincere, and personal. It’s a chance to share your thoughts and feelings about your daughter, her new spouse, and their future together. Your words should be chosen carefully to reflect the love and support you have for the couple.

Remember that your speech is not just about your daughter, but also about your family. It’s a time to acknowledge and thank the guests who have come to celebrate this special occasion with you and your family. You should also take a moment to welcome your new son-in-law into the family and express your happiness at having him as part of your family.

When preparing your speech, it’s important to keep in mind the overall tone of the wedding. Is it a formal, traditional affair, or a more casual, relaxed event? Your speech should fit the tone of the wedding and reflect the personality of the couple.

Finally, don’t forget to practice your speech before the big day. This will help you feel more confident and ensure that you deliver your message clearly and effectively. With a little preparation and a lot of love, your father of the bride speech is sure to be a highlight of the wedding reception.

Brainstorming and Planning

Before you start writing a father of the bride speech, it’s important to take some time to brainstorm and plan. This will help you structure your speech and make sure you include all the important elements. Here are some tips to help you get started:

Step 1: Gather Ideas

The first step in planning your father of the bride speech is to gather ideas. Think about your daughter and her relationship with her new spouse. What are some of their shared interests? What are some of your favorite memories with your daughter? What advice do you want to give the newlyweds?

Write down all your ideas on a piece of paper or in a document. Don’t worry about organizing them yet, just get everything down.

Step 2: Organize Your Ideas

Once you have a list of ideas, it’s time to organize them. Look for common themes or topics that you want to cover in your speech. For example, you might want to talk about your daughter’s childhood, her relationship with her new spouse, and your hopes for their future together.

Create an outline for your speech, with each idea or topic as a separate section. This will help you stay organized and make sure you cover everything you want to say.

Step 3: Write Your Speech

With your ideas organized and your outline in place, it’s time to start writing your speech. Use your outline as a guide, and fill in the details for each section.

Remember to keep your speech concise and focused. Aim for a length of around five minutes, and avoid rambling or going off on tangents.

Step 4: Practice Your Speech

Once you’ve written your speech, it’s important to practice it. Stand in front of a mirror and read your speech out loud. This will help you get comfortable with the material and make sure you’re speaking clearly.

You might also want to practice in front of a friend or family member. Ask for their feedback and make any necessary adjustments to your speech.

Step 5: Deliver Your Speech

On the day of the wedding, take a deep breath and deliver your speech with confidence. Remember to speak slowly and clearly, and make eye contact with the audience.

End your speech with a heartfelt congratulations to the newlyweds, and a toast to their future together.

Writing Tips and Techniques

When it comes to writing a father of the bride speech, there are a few helpful tips and techniques that can make the process easier and ensure that your speech is a success. Here are some pointers to keep in mind:

• Be yourself: The most important thing to remember when writing your speech is to be yourself. Don’t try to be someone you’re not or use language that doesn’t feel natural to you. Speak from the heart and let your personality shine through.
• Practice public speaking: If you’re not used to speaking in public, it’s a good idea to practice beforehand. You can do this by rehearsing your speech in front of a mirror or recording yourself and watching it back. This will help you build confidence and get used to the sound of your own voice.
• Know your audience: When writing your speech, it’s important to keep your audience in mind. Think about who will be listening to your speech and what they might be expecting to hear. Tailor your speech to your audience and try to make it relevant and engaging for them.
• Keep it concise: While you might have a lot to say, it’s important to keep your speech concise and to the point. Aim for a speech that is around five minutes long, as this will keep your audience engaged without dragging on too long.
• Use humor: A little bit of humor can go a long way in a father of the bride speech. Try to include some lighthearted jokes or anecdotes that will make your audience smile and help to break the ice.

Practicing the Speech

Now that you have written your father of the bride speech, it’s time to start practicing. Practicing your speech will help you deliver it confidently and avoid any last-minute jitters. Here are some tips to help you practice your speech effectively:

• Practice in front of a mirror: Practicing in front of a mirror will help you see your facial expressions and body language. This will help you identify any nervous habits or gestures that you might want to avoid.
• Practice with a timer: Timing is crucial when it comes to delivering a speech. Practice your speech with a timer to ensure that you are not going over the allotted time. This will also help you pace yourself and avoid rushing through your speech.
• Practice in front of a friend or family member: Practicing in front of a friend or family member will help you get feedback on your speech. They can also help you identify any areas that need improvement.
• Record yourself: Recording yourself while practicing your speech will help you identify any areas that need improvement. You can also listen to your speech to get a feel for your pacing and tone.

Remember, practice makes perfect. The more you practice your speech, the more confident you will be when it’s time to deliver it. So, take the time to practice your speech and you’ll be sure to deliver a memorable speech that your daughter and her new spouse will cherish forever.

Frequently Asked Questions

What should the father of the bride say in his speech.

As the father of the bride, your speech should be heartfelt and sincere. You should start by welcoming the guests and thanking them for coming to celebrate this special day with your family. Then, you can share some personal anecdotes about your daughter and her relationship with the groom. You can also express your love and pride for your daughter and offer some words of wisdom for the newlyweds.

How long should a father of the bride speech be?

Your speech should be long enough to cover everything you want to say, but not so long that it becomes boring or tedious. A good rule of thumb is to keep your speech between 5-7 minutes. This will give you enough time to say what you want to say without losing the attention of your audience.

What should a dad say to his daughter on her wedding day?

As a father, your daughter’s wedding day is a very emotional and special day for you. You should take this opportunity to express your love and pride for your daughter. You can tell her how much she means to you and how proud you are of the person she has become. You can also offer some words of advice and encouragement for her future with her new spouse.

Is it OK to read the father of the bride speech?

Yes, it is perfectly acceptable to read your speech from a written copy. In fact, it may even be preferable if you are nervous or worried about forgetting what you want to say. However, it is important to practice your speech beforehand so that you can deliver it with confidence and emotion.

Ryan Hart is a certified relationship coach and writer. His mission is to help make connections between people better, stronger, more meaningful, and longer lasting using technology.

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Father of the Bride Speech Structure

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(*Of course, if you’re looking for more than ‘advice’, check out all the different ways the Speechy team can help you write & deliver a great speech. Or check out our new AI-powered team member, SpeechyAI .)

STEP 1 – Say Hello

Don’t waffle. Introduce yourself if it’s a large wedding but crack on with it. Depending on the style of the wedding, there’s no need to address friends and family as ‘ladies and gentlemen’.

The main aim is to get guests laughing within the first couple of lines. Guests are on edge till they know they’re in safe hands. A joke will reassure them of this.

But , and it’s a Kardashian sized but, the joke needs to be a good one. It can’t be one that you’ve cut and pasted from a template and it can’t be a ‘wedding joke’ that you’ve googled (even if you found it on the 18 th page where no normal person dares to scroll).

The humour should reflect the wedding and its guests. If your daughter’s invited a load of hipsters, maybe it’s something simple like you ‘haven’t seen this many beards since the ZZ Top Farewell Tour’ (surely they’ve had one?). You’re looking for something inclusive that everyone can appreciate.

Check out our Make Your Wedding Speech Funny blog for more comedy-writing techniques.

STEP 2 -Welcome Everyone

You’re the wedding warm-up man and your job is to welcome all the guests.

Some dads take this too literally; studying the invite list and evaluating who’s worth a namecheck. The trouble with this is once you start mentioning certain people, others wonder why they’re not worthy.

It’s especially dangerous if you start mentioning elderly family members without properly considering your daughter’s partner’s side of the family too.

The best advice is to keep your welcome heartfelt but inclusive & concise.

And of course, remember, it’s actually the newlywed’s job to thank people.

STEP 3 – Tell Everyone How Wonderful Your Daughter Is

The biggest mistake dads make is telling people what they already know. Guests don’t need to hear about your daughter’s career achievements or how dedicated she is to her hobbies, they want to get a better insight into what type of person she is. They also want a laugh.

Start with her childhood. Think about the classic anecdotes that are, not only humorous but also reveal a bit of her character. Certainly include the stories that prove she’s always been caring or ambitious (or whatever unique qualities your daughter may possess) but be sure to include a few ‘naughty’ stories too. Dads are allowed to be sentimental and soppy but you never want to look pompous and you don’t want to be dull.

Of course, as well as her childhood, you need to talk about the woman she is today. Rather than just using adjectives and generic bridal clichés, think of a good story that illustrates her character. Remember, prove don’t tell.

When we work with dads, we try to find a narrative thread so that all the insights and anecdotes flow. You want your speech to sound like a story as opposed to seeming like a list of random thoughts. Check out our FOTB speech templates if you need help with that.

STEP 4 – Welcome Your Daughter’s Partner To The Family

Avoid the usual platitudes and try to pay a tribute to their unique character. Are they a tech-nerd, a deluded West Brom fan, or a closet crossword enthusiast? Find something fun to play with.

As well as appreciating what the groom/bride has brought to your daughter’s life, pinpoint the areas that you two have bonded over too… even if it’s just a mutual appreciation of malt whiskey. And, if you’re still married to your daughter’s mum, make sure she’s included in your endorsement of them too.

Finally, remember to pay a tribute to your new in-laws. Even if you don’t know them that well yet, say you’re looking forward to sharing lots more happy occasions with them in the future.

STEP 5 – Sum Up A Lifetime of Love

Yes, we know it’s easy for us to say but how exactly do you sum up a lifetime of love in less than ten minutes (or 1,300 words at an absolute maximum)?

To reassure you, no one expects Byron and no wants over-the-top declarations of fatherly devotion. Your daughter just wants to know that she’s an extra special person in your life and that she’s still got lifetime membership in your heart.

She wants to know you appreciate her for the woman she is today and the memories you’ve already shared. She wants to know that you approve of her new spouse and that you hope to make more memories with them now included in your family.

Of course, sometimes you’ll find someone is actually better at saying the things you want to say than you are! You may find our father of the bride quotes post helpful.

If you can use a quote that means something to you both then that will add something special. Think of the books you used to read together or the songs you’ve bonded over and see if that inspires the perfect words.

Of course, if you’re looking at creating your own poignant quotes, consider utilising SpeechyAI which can help turn your disparate thoughts into something more meaningful.

STEP 6 – Give a Heartfelt Toast

Conclude your speech with a toast to the married couple .

Traditionally it’s to the ‘ health and happiness of the happy couple’ but try to make it a bit more interesting than that – something that genuinely reflects the character of the couple and echoes the themes of your speech. It doesn’t need to be overly poetic – something simple like toasting ‘a lifetime of dancing on tables’ always works.

If you want more help, you can read three example father of the bride speeches we have written.

The Speechwriting Experts

The Speechy team  are TV-trained scriptwriters/comedians by trade & we’ve helped 1,000s of speakers around the world deliver their dream speech.

Our advice has been quoted everywhere from  The New York Times  to  Grazia  and from Forbes to The Observer . Our founder has also featured on the  BBC Sounds’ Best Men podcast with Jason Manford and written ‘ The Modern Couple’s Guide to Wedding Speeches’ , published by Little, Brown.

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A Shy Dad's Guide to Giving the Perfect Wedding Speech

Follow these tips from a communications expert and you'll deliver a speech your daughter will love.

Ellie is a freelance writer for MarthaStewart.com.

Some fathers love the limelight, so when it comes time for these dads to pen their father of the bride speeches , the material comes spilling out. But others feel shy about the experience-and for good reason! On such an important day, in a room filled with important people, it's easy to let emotion get the best of you. That's why we caught up with Balraj Arunasalam, president of Toastmasters International , an organization that specializes in communication and leadership development. Not only is he an expert in delivering an incredible speech under any circumstances, but he's also in the process of drafting a reception toast for his own daughter's wedding. He was kind enough to share some tips on the process, offering practical advice that can help even the shyest dad have his moment to shine.

Wait to Write

Arunasalam suggests dads first focus on what they want to say rather than worry about how they want to say it. "Take time two to three weeks prior to the ceremony to write several thoughts on the occasion," he says. "Make sure you have all your thoughts together first, then play around with the words."

Use Your Expertise

If you're not sure where to start, begin with what you know best: your daughter . "Add your favorite memories... when her first smile captured your heart, a first day of school, and so forth," says Arunasalam. From there, he suggests hitting foolproof beats like welcoming the spouse to your family and wishing the bride and groom a happy, prosperous life together.

Practice Your Speech

Once you have your words down, practice, practice, practice. And don't underestimate the power of reading it aloud in front of a mirror. What sounds good in your head may trip you up when you hear it spoken, so be sure to get comfortable well before the reception.

Let It Flow

"Deliver your speech from the heart," says Arunasalam. The father of the bride's toast is such an emotional moment between dad and daughter , and it's one that will make everyone in the room teary as soon as you stand up. Know that no matter what you say, your little girl will love every second of it. Just as much as she already loves you.

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How to write a father of the bride speech

Easy Weddings

Writing – let alone actually delivering – your all-important father of the bride speech may seem daunting and, with all eyes on you, it’s understandable you’d be nervous. But you needn’t be because, once the speech is written and the nerves are subdued, it’s actually a wonderful moment that can be a real highlight, especially for your darling daughter.

The father of the bride speech is, usually, the first of the wedding speeches to be delivered, usually towards the end of the main meal . Traditionally, the father of the bride was the host of the wedding, but even where he isn’t, the father of the bride speech usually still includes many host-like aspects such as welcoming the guests and thanking them for their gifts.

Of course, traditionally, the father of the bride also share some words of wisdom or marriage advice – and, sometimes, even a few tears!

The delivery

Standing centre stage, delivering a speech in front of your nearest and dearest on such an important occasion may seem like a difficult, perhaps, terrifying task.

But remember, there is no need to worry at all. You’re surrounded by your friends and family, all of whom want to see you do well!

They know how proud you are and are probably dying to hear what you have to say! Simply take a deep breath and try and enjoy yourself.

Oh, and, if you’re considering steadying your nerves with a little liquid courage, be sparing in how much you drink. You don’t want to have too much courage, after all. You want to enjoy the moment and you want your daughter – and your entire family – to be proud of your performance, not embarrassed by it.

Getting started…

The hardest part of writing a good father of the bride speech is getting started.

A good tip is to break the speech down into headings. Under each heading, jot down some notes, ideas and emotions then expand on them.

Think about how you felt when your daughter was born, what it was like raising her as a child, some of her big milestones such as a graduation or a significant birthday. Then, attempt to put your emotions onto words.

As the speech starts to take shape, practice reading it out loud. Take note of how long it takes to read each section and try not to speak for longer than about five to seven minutes.

Want professional help?

Part 1: The introduction

But keep it clean.

People are expecting a mature gentleman, not a larrikin – that’s the best man’s role!

If joking is not your thing, simply start by introducing yourself and mentioning how beautiful the bride looks.

Say a few words about the wedding day so far, and how perfectly everything has run and, if you have a few funny stories from the lead up to the wedding or the early part of the wedding day itself, you can include those at the start of the speech.

Part 2: Welcome the guests

This is where your role as the father of the bride kicks in. Be sure to thank everyone for coming and give special thanks to those who have travelled to attend the celebrations.

Don’t forget to thank those who helped in the planning and organisation of your daughter’s big day and make sure you write down any names that you feel deserve a mention during this part of the speech.

Also, mention any significant family members or friends who are absent and, if you feel comfortable, those who may recently have passed away.

There are many great ways you can honour deceased loved one’s wedding ceremony. Here, for example, are 10 heart-warming ideas to honour any mothers who may have passed away.

Part 3: Now, it’s all about your daughter

This is the highlight of any father of the bride speech – and everyone’s waiting to hear it.

It’s not often you get to discuss your daughter’s many qualities and achievements so publicly, so make the most of it and indulge yourself. Make sure you compliment her; tell her how wonderful she looks and how proud you are of her. Don’t worry, it’s OK to gush about your darling daughter.

Try to talk a little about your daughter’s early years, perhaps tell a funny story or two about when she was like growing up. Feel free to tease her about some of the things she has done but be kind and don’t say anything that you know will really embarrass her.

Tell a story that reveals her personality: how strong, tough, creative, kind she is, perhaps? Or her love of animals or sports.

Finally, talk about when she met her new husband, making sure you tell the story in a positive way!

This will lead you nicely into the next part.

Part 4: And, don’t forget the son in law or daughter in law

Here, it is customary for the father of the bride to welcome the groom (or, in the case of a same-sex wedding, the other bride) into his family, and to express his happiness at the new connection between the two families that the marriage will bring.

Talk about your first encounter with the groom. Even if the first impression was not positive, it may be fun to mention it, as long as you follow up with how fond of him you are now – and say it

Depending on your relationship with your new son-in-law, it’s probably fine to poke (a little) fun at him, and to joke about what he is getting himself in for marrying your daughter.

Other anecdotes that work well include the first time you realised your daughter was in love with him and your reaction to their engagement.

Think of positive qualities about the groom that will make him a good husband and ways that he has made your daughter happy.

Part 5: Words of wisdom

At the end of your father of the bride speech, you should congratulate the happy couple on a wonderful wedding, and express your confidence in their future happiness together.

Traditionally, your closing should also contain some words of wisdom about life and marriage. This might include tips on how to have a happy marriage and things that are important in life.

This could be humorous or tongue-in-cheek.

Part 6: Toast

Finally, propose a toast to the bride and groom and have all the guests raise their glasses to the happy couple.

There you go. You’ve done it! It wasn’t that hard, was it?

Not sure you can do it? Visit our partners over at Speechform for info on how they can help you!

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Craft a Memorable Father of the Bride Speech with Our Guide

Introduction.

A s a father, your daughter's wedding day is one of the most significant moments in your life, something you've eagerly anticipated since the day she was born. But while you may have imagined walking her down the aisle, nothing compares to the reality of that moment. The father of the bride speech is essential to any wedding, but getting it right can be daunting. You want to strike the perfect balance between humor, emotion, and sincerity while avoiding cringe-worthy moments. 

But fear not because this article will guide you. From what to say to the dos and don'ts, and even some sample father of the bride speeches to help you get started, this article is your true friend when it comes to creating a unique and memorable father of the bride speech.

The Father of the Bride Speech : What to Write, Say & Do

We've got you covered, whether you're a pro or feeling the jitters. Stick to our tips and give a father’s wedding speech that will make your daughter beam with pride.

Father Of the Bride Speech Template

Wondering how to write the best father of the bride speech? Here's a breakdown of a simple yet impactful speech. 

1. Breaking the ice

Start your father of the bride speech with a quick introduction and a funny joke to break the ice. While everyone knows who you are, it's always better to set the tone of the speech and welcome the guests. However, don't take too much time thanking them; it's the groom's responsibility.

2. Remembering fond memories

This is your daughter's big day, so highlight her life journey. Share some endearing anecdotes from her childhood that reflect her personality today. You can be funny, but avoid any stories that could make her uncomfortable. After all, it's her special moment

3. Praising your daughter 

Use this day to show how proud you are of your daughter. Add to it the memories from her childhood - elaborate on how she has always been a source of joy and inspiration. Express your love and admiration for her without holding back.

4. Welcoming the new family member

The speech is also ideal for welcoming your son-in-law to the family. Focus on the positive aspects of his personality and how he complements your daughter. If you don't know him well yet, share your daughter's thoughts and feelings about her new spouse.

5. Humor in moderation

Share a funny story about the newlyweds that will make everyone laugh. It could be about how they met or your first impression of your daughter's spouse. Just make sure it's not too embarrassing or inappropriate for them. After all, you want to keep the mood light and enjoyable.

6. Gratitude and acknowledgement

It's important to acknowledge and thank the bride's mother and new in-laws in your speech. Thank your wife for raising an amazing daughter, and embrace your new family members with open arms. Show your appreciation for their support and participation in this special day.

7. Parting words of wisdom

As the eldest of the speakers, you can share some wisdom and advice for the newlyweds. Share your insights on maintaining a healthy and happy marriage or living a fulfilling life. Make the most of this moment, and inspire the newlyweds to create their beautiful journey together.

What Should A Father Of The Bride Speech Include? Tips and Pitfalls to Avoid.

With the father of the bride speech templates in consideration, let's discuss what to include and avoid to ensure a successful speech. Avoid the 7 common pitfalls and deliver a speech your daughter will cherish forever.

Pick a theme

Select a meaningful theme for your speech that reflects the occasion and your relationship with the couple. A well-chosen theme will make organizing your thoughts and delivering a cohesive message easier.

2. Keep it short

Aim for a five-minute speech. Stick to the main points and share heartfelt anecdotes to keep your audience engaged.

3. Stay positive

Remember that a wedding toast is not the time to bring up negative stories or air grievances. Keep your speech uplifting and focus on positive memories and wishes for the couple's future together.

4. Personalize your message

Make your speech unique and personal by sharing stories and memories that showcase the couple's love and commitment. Speak from the heart and avoid cliches or generic advice.

5. Practice makes perfect

Prepare and practice your speech well in advance to ensure you feel confident and comfortable delivering it. Practice in front of a mirror or with a friend, and aim to memorize your speech if possible.

6. Be yourself

Don't try to be someone you're not in your speech. Speak authentically and from the heart, and let your personality shine through. Remember, your words should reflect your relationship with the couple.

7. End on a high note

Conclude your speech with a memorable and heartfelt message that leaves a lasting impression on the couple and guests. Wish the couple well and raise a toast to their future happiness together.

Kick Start the Brainstorming 

It's normal to feel unsure about what to say in your speech. If you're struggling, try using these questions to get your creative juices flowing.

• What's your earliest memory of your daughter? - Asking this question can bring heartwarming and nostalgic memories that you can incorporate into your speech.
• What qualities do you admire most in your daughter's partner? - Focusing on the positives of your daughter's partner can help you build a connection and show your support for their union.
• What advice would you give your daughter for a successful marriage? - Drawing from your own experiences and mistakes can provide valuable insight and guidance for the newlyweds.
• How has your relationship with your daughter changed over the years? - Reflecting on the changes and growth in your relationship with your daughter can add depth and emotion to your speech.
• What message do you want to leave with your daughter and her partner on their wedding day? - A clear message can help you stay focused and deliver a meaningful speech that will resonate with the couple and guests.

Father of the Bride Speech Examples

Get inspired by real-life father of the bride speeches, as they have been tried and tested. These excellent examples showcase what has worked for others and can help you craft your speech.

Simple father of the bride speech example

My dear daughter, today is a day I have both looked forward to and dreaded. As I stand here, watching you radiate with joy and beauty, I feel proud and nostalgic. It seems like only yesterday when I first held you in my arms, and now you are, all grown up and getting married. You have been the light of my life.

Today, I am thrilled to welcome my new son-in-law into our family. I am so glad to see that he makes you happy and loves you so much. I do not doubt that together, you will build a beautiful life filled with love, laughter, and unforgettable memories.

Looking back, I see how much I've learned from you. Your tenacity, courage, and kind heart have taught me valuable life lessons; I am grateful for that. It is an honor to walk you down the aisle and give you away to your beloved.

Lastly, I want you to know that no matter what, I’ll always be there for you. You will forever be my little girl, and I will forever be your proud dad. Congratulations, my dear daughter, and cheers to the happy couple!

Funny father of the speech example

Hello everyone, I am thrilled to have you here today to celebrate the marriage of my beloved daughter. As a father, it's hard to let go of your little girl, but I'm happy to see her in good hands with her charming groom.

When my daughter first brought her future husband home, I was relieved that he wasn't covered in tattoos or piercings. Instead, I found a kind-hearted and successful man who loves my daughter unconditionally.

Marriage is a journey, not a destination. There will be moments when you'll want to scream and other times when you'll laugh until you cry. But always remember to be each other's biggest supporters and love each other fiercely.

As for myself, I'll be retiring as a "Dad" today and promoting myself to the "Father-in-law." But don't worry; I'll still be here to offer unsolicited advice and embarrass you in front of your friends.

Cheers to the newlyweds, and may your love be as strong and vibrant as your wedding day!

Sentimental father of the bride speech example 

Dear guests,

As I stand here before you today, watching my beautiful daughter start her journey with the love of her life, I am filled with overwhelming emotion. From the moment she was born, I knew she was destined for greatness, and seeing her marry the man of her dreams only confirms that belief.

Daughter, I'm so proud of the person you've grown up to be. You have become an independent, caring, and intelligent person, and it has been a privilege to watch you blossom over the years.

And to the groom, I want to thank you for being the perfect partner for my daughter. Seeing how you love and support her makes me grateful that she found someone like you to share her life with.

I do not doubt that the future holds wonderful things for both of you, and I am honored to have been a part of this special day. Congratulations to the happy couple, and may your love continue to grow stronger with each passing day.

Short father of the bride speech example 

Ladies and gentlemen,

On this beautiful day, I feel grateful to have gained a son-in-law and a new friend. As a dad, I've watched my daughter grow into a beautiful, independent woman, and it brings me so much joy to see her this happy. It takes a special person to win over my daughter's heart, and I am glad you have done so with flying colors. To the happy couple, I wish you a lifetime of love and happiness. Cheers to a new chapter in your lives, and may your love continue to flourish and grow.

Thank you. 

As your daughter's wedding day approaches, crafting a heartfelt father of the bride speech can be overwhelming. But with the right tools and techniques, you can deliver a speech that will leave a lasting impression on your daughter, her new spouse, and guests. From templates to start with to questions for brainstorming, to tips for avoiding common pitfalls, this article has provided you with everything you need to know. And with the help of some real-life father of the bride speech examples, you can add your personal touch to create a speech that will be treasured for years to come. Congratulations on your daughter’s wedding! 

ALSO READ:   Special duties that concern the father of the bride on the wedding day

Parents of The Groom Speech

Ai generator.

Good evening, everyone,

Thank you all for being here today to celebrate this beautiful occasion. As the parents of the groom, [Groom’s Name], we are filled with immense joy and pride. It means the world to us to have you all here to share in this special day.

Reflecting on [Groom’s Name]’s Journey

From the moment [Groom’s Name] entered our lives, he brought us an abundance of joy and happiness. Watching him grow from a curious, energetic child into the incredible man he is today has been one of our greatest blessings. Whether it was his dedication to his studies, his passion for his hobbies, or his unwavering loyalty to his friends and family, [Groom’s Name] has always shown determination and a big heart.

Meeting [Bride’s Name]

When [Groom’s Name] introduced us to [Bride’s Name], we quickly saw how special she is. Her warmth, kindness, and love for [Groom’s Name] were evident from the start. We could see that they complemented each other perfectly and brought out the best in one another. [Bride’s Name], we are so grateful to welcome you into our family. You have made our son incredibly happy, and we look forward to many wonderful moments together.

Sharing Memories

One of our favorite memories of [Groom’s Name] is when he decided to build a treehouse in our backyard. He was about ten years old and filled with so much enthusiasm for the project. He spent weeks planning, gathering materials, and working tirelessly. The end result was a slightly lopsided but sturdy treehouse that became a favorite gathering spot for his friends. This story illustrates his dedication, resourcefulness, and ability to bring people together – qualities that will serve him well in his marriage.

Words of Wisdom and Wishes

As you both embark on this new journey together, we want to share a few words of wisdom. Marriage is a partnership built on love, trust, and respect. Always communicate openly with each other, support one another through the good times and the challenges, and never forget to cherish the small, everyday moments that bring joy to your lives.

Expressing Gratitude

We also want to take a moment to thank everyone who has helped make this day so special. To our friends and family who have traveled from near and far, your presence here means so much to us. To those who have contributed to the planning and preparations, your efforts are deeply appreciated. And to everyone who has supported [Groom’s Name] and [Bride’s Name] throughout their journey, thank you for your love and encouragement.

Now, if everyone could please raise their glasses. Here’s to [Groom’s Name] and [Bride’s Name]. May your life together be filled with love, laughter, and endless happiness. May you continue to grow together, support each other, and create beautiful memories. We are so proud of you both and look forward to watching your love story unfold.

Text prompt

• Instructive
• Professional

10 Examples of Public speaking

20 Examples of Gas lighting

The Marked Man

• Christopher Spata Times staff
• Dan Sullivan Times staff
• A Life, Cast Into Chaos
• Surviving a Death Sentence
• Who Killed Barbara Grams?
• After Prison, a Search for a Good Life

About the story

I: a life, cast into chaos, a teen goes on trial in a sensational murder case hinging on a bite mark..

The maintenance man climbed to the country club roof at dawn. As he reattached a loose panel to a leaking air duct last fall, the placid fairways glowed, and his mind went back years — to another rooftop, another brief moment of peace, when he’d gazed out at a vista of razor wire. Back then, while laboring in prison blues, he’d called out to his boss for a tool. A guard threw him in solitary confinement for raising his voice.

Most of Robert DuBoise’s memories go something like that.

These days, DuBoise walks carpeted hallways in orthopedic work boots, carrying his ladder. Members of Ardea Country Club in Oldsmar see a sweet 59-year-old with puffy eyes and a grin. “How are you today?” he asks in his froggy voice. “Is there anything I can do?” They may have heard about his 37 years in prison for a crime he did not commit, but few know how his unlikely freedom intertwines with a bigger Tampa saga.

DuBoise’s 2020 exoneration in a single murder and rape case revealed what authorities call a vicious spree of serial killings, the links between them buried in case files and a morgue cabinet for decades.

When he walked free, much lay ahead: his bid for compensation, a search for the true killers, a political power struggle — and the question of how to salvage what was left of his life.

Yet DuBoise doesn’t complain. Stuck in traffic, he smiles: “I’m grateful to even be sitting at a red light.” He possesses what a judge called “an uncommon capacity for grace and forgiveness.” Pressed on the matter, however, he eventually relents.

“Just because I have a good attitude,” he said, “does not mean I’m not mad about what was done to me.”

Home after a long workday last year, DuBoise leaned back on his faux-leather loveseat. He gazed off, seemingly beyond the bounds of his one-room efficiency with its twin bed against the wall, positioned just like in prison. People kept telling him his story mattered. If that were so, he wanted it told in its entirety.

His name was clear. But he was still living like he had something to prove.

TAMPA, 1983

An 18-year-old Robert DuBoise pedaled his 10-speed across the city at twilight. From the red-brick Seminole Heights rental where he lived with his family of seven, he streaked past Cuban cafes, bars and trailer parks along the shoulder of Hillsborough Avenue to his job at Noel’s Auto Upholstery near Town ‘N Country. His long, dark hair blew in the warm wind and auto exhaust.

The kid was a worker, had been ever since he’d dragged a lawnmower up the street at age 8 to bring cash home. He’d dropped out his sophomore year but could fix nearly anything, an almost preternatural ability he’d honed alongside a handy father who’d been paralyzed after slipping in a meat freezer.

“I was his hands,” DuBoise said. “We couldn’t pay someone to fix things.”

After a long day at the shop, DuBoise would load his bike into a coworker’s trunk. At his friend’s apartment, they’d share dinner — taking turns holding his friend’s baby. DuBoise saw possibilities.

He’d always been a bit of a romantic. At 13, he’d had a cousin ink an older girl’s initials on his forearm and the name of her little daughter on his bicep with a homemade tattoo gun. Even as a kid he dreamed of a wife and children.

DuBoise’s own family was close. He had a brother and four sisters. From 14 on, he did the driving, with everyone piling in for errands. While his mother shopped for bologna and instant mashed potatoes, his dad and grandma read the Tampa Tribune in the car.

On top of the family’s government assistance, DuBoise used his pay from odd jobs and the upholstery shop to help provide. Sometimes, they ate rice from the church pantry. When the rent went up, they moved. It was a modest life. He counted on little more.

They knew tragedy — their father’s crippling fall, a 2-year-old sister’s sudden death, their Ballast Point home’s destruction in a spectacular fire. An older sister claimed “a dark cloud” followed the family. She ran away at 15, alleging abuse by an uncle and violent discipline at the hands of her grandmother.

When DuBoise was 17, a sheriff’s deputy caught him and a friend sitting on a car hood in a Brandon apartment complex. A hose dangled from the gas tank of a Ranchero, with gasoline siphoning into a bucket. A stolen toolbox and extension cord sat nearby. DuBoise fessed up.

His mom, Myra, worried about her son running with an iffy crowd, like an older guy who’d been busted for drugs. She knew they killed time at a sleazy motel on Hillsborough Avenue and a service station in a rough stretch of town.

One night, DuBoise and his family dropped off his little sister at Tampa Skating Center. His favorite station, Q105-FM, had been playing The Police’s new single nonstop. “Every breath you take,” sang Sting, “I’ll be watching you.”

In the parking lot, a middle-aged Tampa police detective strode over. Phillip Saladino knew the family from patrolling their old South Tampa neighborhood. He peered in, past DuBoise’s father, toward the teenager. Maybe, he suggested, DuBoise could help him with an investigation?

DuBoise didn’t know he could say no. What he also didn’t know was that Saladino had been looking for him. A woman about his age had been found dead behind a dentist’s office — stripped, raped and beaten. Police had no clear suspects, but a gas station clerk near the scene had pointed to DuBoise as part of a group known to “cause problems.”

THE BOOMING ‘80S

Freshly paved neighborhoods sprouted where swamps and orange groves once stood. Out-of-towners bought up suburban Carrollwood and Brandon, while hotels multiplied along West Shore Boulevard. Anchoring the sprawling region was Tampa, a hardscrabble port town shaped by its Latin heritage and a belief that the city could be something greater.

Amid all the ribbon cuttings, violent crime surged. By mid-1983, local cops and prosecutors were inundated with murder cases.

Barbara Grams lived close to downtown, a 19-year-old with lots of friends. She worked a fast food job at the Tampa Bay Center mall, taking it seriously enough to report an employee for stealing from the register — though not so seriously that she didn’t slip free baked potatoes to her friends. Her boss noticed she hung out with “acid rocker types.”

Late that August, as the skylights darkened, Grams wound down a shift at the Hot Potato, spooning cheese sauce and turkey cubes onto steaming spuds.

She clocked out past 9 p.m., after workers rolled down security cages and exited past the dormant carousel and the “Risky Business” movie poster with Tom Cruise peering over his Ray-Bans.

She stepped into the warm Tampa air, a thin braid swinging in her loose brown hair.

Grams had moved out of her parents’ place a couple of years earlier. She shared a home with three male roommates and their mom in Riverside Heights. Wanting the exercise, she’d declined a ride from one of her housemates who’d stopped by for a plate. She was taking amphetamine diet pills, “black beauties,” worried about her figure.

She crossed the mall parking lot with the Buccaneers’ sombrero-shaped stadium at her back. She wore a pink tube top, toting her work clothes in a County Seat shopping bag. She passed dark offices and glowing storefronts, crossed the Hillsborough River and turned onto North Boulevard, her street.

She kept away from Memorial Park Cemetery. The gravestones creeped her out, especially after dark.

Friends making a run for sodas and cigarettes at Hutto’s Corner Grocery honked when they spotted her, but she waved them off. She was four blocks from home.

When they doubled back minutes later, she was gone.

The next morning, Saladino and Kenneth Burke, another veteran investigator, stood at an autopsy table, looking over the young woman’s battered body.

A medical examiner pointed to a semicircular mark over Grams’ left cheekbone. It looked like a bite.

UNDER SCRUTINY

Thirty-nine days after Grams was found, the detective picked up DuBoise on a weekend morning. Downtown in the empty detective division, Saladino handed the teenager a yellow block. DuBoise bit down, feeling gooey beeswax press against his tongue and cheeks, like thick Jell-O.

Years later, DuBoise would testify that they passed two young women on a sidewalk as Saladino drove him home from the station.

“Blondes or brunettes?” he recalled the detective asking.

“What does it matter?” DuBoise replied.

Detectives had been busy collecting wax tooth impressions from more than a dozen of Grams’ acquaintances and other men. Improvising, they had a mouthpiece fashioned at a high school’s machine shop, to use with beeswax from a police captain’s hive. They sent the results to a dentist they’d enlisted to seek a match.

Everywhere DuBoise went in the following days, it seemed Saladino had been there first. He’d questioned people at the upholstery shop and the Journey’s End bar where DuBoise shot pool. DuBoise tried calling to see what was up, but Saladino brushed him off.

Not long after, the dentist notified detectives that he’d found a match.

On Friday, Oct. 21, DuBoise accepted an invite from Joanne “Josie” Suarez to go bar hopping. He’d met Suarez earlier that year when she nearly ran him over in a bar parking lot. She was four years older and dressed differently than the people he knew, like someone on TV. She was still recovering from a violent car crash that left her scarred and taking a lot of prescription painkillers, but DuBoise liked her.

To her, DuBoise was just some strange, poor kid she let hang around. “A lowlife,” she said years later.

Closing in on DuBoise, police approached Suarez. Your pal killed someone, she remembers them telling her. You need to help us bring him in.

DuBoise didn’t know he was being led to his arrest when he rented one of the Peter Pan Motel’s rickety rooms off Hillsborough Avenue before their night out, hoping Suarez would come back with him. Around 2 a.m., after stopping at one last bar, he drove Suarez there. They’d just gotten inside when the police knocked.

Years later, DuBoise testified that the officers claimed his mother was in trouble. Come with us, they’d said.

Confused, he went. An officer sat with him in a sergeant’s office, chatting idly about fishing. DuBoise was half-listening, worrying about his mom, when the man asked: “Why did you do it?”

“Why’d I do what?” he replied.

“Why’d you kill her?”

“Kill who?”

DuBoise tensed as four men held him down and shackled his wrists and ankles.

He yelled that he wasn’t a killer, all the way to the Morgan Street Jail.

Dragged into a cell, his face hit a concrete bunk. A nurse approached with a syringe.

His heart pounded as the sedative hit his bloodstream. He drifted into blackness.

DuBoise awoke groggy. He tried to move his arms, but they were strapped. He stared at the ceiling. A day earlier, he’d cruised wide open streets.

At his first court appearance, he learned he’d been charged with first-degree murder. Who’d been killed, or how, he did not know. He had no sense of what evidence the state might claim to have.

The detainees on the 16-cell block that became his new world acted strangely. Sedated, they walked in place like zombies. The inmates called it “the Thorazine shuffle.”

As months passed, he got drips of information. It felt like forever before he met his court-appointed lawyer, and forever before he saw him again — and by then it was a different guy.

He took a polygraph. He was told he’d passed, but nothing changed. He had no idea how any of this worked. Legally, DuBoise had reached adulthood, but he was still a teenager who lived at home. This was simply too big of a mistake, he thought, clinging to the idea that the people in charge would fix it.

Days blurred as he gazed out his skinny cell window, until one day, he saw familiar faces — Saladino and another officer. Soon, he watched cellmates get called out, one by one.

As they returned, he heard whispers that the detectives were asking about him.

The men came back quickly, except for one. Claude Butler was a small-time criminal, mostly a go-between for drug deals and prostitution. Detectives pulled him aside again and again.

When Butler introduced himself in the dayroom later, DuBoise thought he seemed like a con artist.

“Why do they keep calling you out?” DuBoise asked.

“They’re just trying to help you,” Butler said.

TRIAL, FEBRUARY 1985

DuBoise had waited 16 months in jail when sheriff’s deputies walked him into a courtroom. His grandmother had bought him a gray three-piece suit with wide lapels. His hair had grown scraggly, but he’d declined a cut. They want me to look like a schoolboy, he’d thought, but that’s not me.

His muscles ached after standing in a holding cell since 4 a.m., but he felt oddly relieved. His trial — the truth, as he saw it — had finally arrived. Soon he’d be back to helping his dad around the house and driving for his mom, who’d never learned.

The victim’s parents held hands in the front row. Judge Harry Lee Coe III peered down from the bench through thick glasses. People had called him “Hangin’ Harry” ever since he was a minor league pitcher slinging curveballs said to hang in the air. By then the name referenced his harsh sentences — 99 years for a teenager who’d robbed a cabbie of $14, or life for a man who fell $41 behind on probation payments.

DuBoise stiffened as lawyers probed potential jurors, asking their opinions on the death penalty.

He eyed the prosecutor, broad and tall with Beatles-style hair. Mark Ober led the state attorney’s “major crimes” division, meaning mostly homicides. He knew how to manage a case that wasn’t an easy win. In 1980, for instance, he put away a former cop who’d killed a security guard during a supermarket robbery.

In his calming drawl, Ober told the jury that the young man at the defense table was a murderer.

Not until right then did DuBoise fully comprehend the detailed story built against him.

A dentist had discovered Barbara Grams after pulling up to his office near Hutto’s Corner. He spotted an emptied purse and wallet first, then a woman on her back, nude but for a tube top pulled over her breasts.

Bloody boards lay in the grass. A pair of knees, it seemed, had dug ruts in the dirt during a struggle.

The woman had been raped and bludgeoned — the center of her face an open wound. She also had an odd semicircular mark over her left cheekbone with fainter ragged edges above it. A bite mark, Ober told the jury.

DuBoise watched Ober gesture toward him, explaining how, “in a fit of violent rage,” he was the one responsible.

Over two weeks, Ober called a parade of witnesses, and DuBoise felt more and more like he was outside, watching through a window.

Some of the physical evidence actually pointed away from him. Hairs lifted from Grams’ body, for instance, didn’t match his. Ober began by building his case on words.

A neighbor recalled a late-night scream, a loud radio and tires screeching.

Another witness lived at the Peter Pan Motel. He claimed he’d met a sullen DuBoise at a party and that DuBoise said, “I’m wanted for murder.”

I don’t even know this guy, DuBoise thought.

Josie Suarez took the stand. She called DuBoise a friend, though she believed he harbored a crush. She said he’d bragged about fighting and killing and that she’d seen scratches on his chest and back. Another time, she said, he’d flashed a ring on his pinkie like one missing from Grams’ finger.

Why, DuBoise wondered, was she saying this crap? Was she scared of the cops?

Claude Butler took the stand in jail clothes. He was, by then, serving time for robbery and kidnapping.

He told the jury he’d known DuBoise before lockup. They were “real good friends.”

DuBoise gaped. They’d met on the cell block.

DuBoise had initially proclaimed his innocence, Butler said. But on Christmas 1983, as the prisoners gathered to watch TV, he said, DuBoise confessed.

In Butler’s retelling, DuBoise had been riding around, drinking and getting high with his brother, Victor, and their friend Ray Garcia. Short on money, the men tried to snatch Barbara Grams’ purse, but she recognized Garcia. They threw her in the car.

“The next thing he know, he said that he was having sex with the girl,” Butler said, “and he said then, while he was having sex with her, said that Ray hit the girl with a stick, said that it grossed him out, so he got up off the girl.”

Butler claimed a tearful DuBoise described watching the other men rape the woman before his brother hit her again.

Ober asked Butler if he’d been promised anything in exchange for his testimony.

No, he said.

THE BITE MARK

It soon became clear that the heart of the state’s case was the bite mark.

Ober’s star witness was Richard Souviron, a suave dentist famed for his role in securing a conviction against serial killer Ted Bundy. A “founding father” in the nascent field of forensic odontology, he’d testified in a handful of bite-mark cases by 1985 and would go on to testify in dozens more.

In the DuBoise case, he explained, he’d tried examining the actual bite mark, but the formaldehyde it was preserved in had shrunk it. Instead, Souviron reviewed photographs.

He’d excluded other suspects, such as Grams’ roommates and a man who’d given her diet pills, by looking at the beeswax models of their teeth, he said.

Souviron held a cast of DuBoise’s teeth over a photo of Grams’ wound as he narrated exactly how they’d gripped the young woman’s cheek.

“The teeth of Robert DuBoise, upper and lower, left the bite mark on the left cheek of Barbara Grams,” the dentist said, “to a reasonable degree of dental certainty.”

During cross-examination, Robert Nutter, one of DuBoise’s defense attorneys, grilled Souviron about a speech the dentist had given about three months earlier to a convention of police chiefs. Nutter quoted:

“If you tell me that is the guy that did it, I will go into court and say that is the guy that did it.”

“I have no problem with that if you tell me the guy confessed.”

Souviron suggested the defense lawyer took his statements grossly out of context.

Angelo Ferlita, the other defense attorney, ridiculed Souviron as “the great super sleuth.” He’d already lambasted bite mark evidence as unscientific and called to the stand another expert dentist who said DuBoise was not the biter.

To the jury, Ober acknowledged the evidence was imperfect. There was not a single eyewitness tying DuBoise to the victim or the scene. There were no fingerprints, no hairs or other physical evidence. But, he argued, there was no evidence to prove DuBoise wasn’t there.

Later, the prosecutor sipped a soft drink in the courthouse hallway. Another lawyer, who’d been observing the trial, walked past and quietly declared, “That’s not guilty. That’s called not guilty.”

THE VERDICT

DuBoise studied the jurors as they took their seats after 1½ days of deliberation. Some of the women, he thought, looked like they’d been crying.

The foreperson passed a sheet of paper to a bailiff, who gave it to Judge Coe, who asked DuBoise to stand.

Guilty of first-degree murder.

Guilty of attempted sexual battery.

“Fuck this shit,” DuBoise muttered. He kicked a chair as deputies hustled him out of the room to cool down.

When he returned, the bailiffs had taken his necktie. “I know you’re in a tough position …” Coe started.

“You don’t know how tough it is,” DuBoise yelled.

He turned to his attorneys.

“I don’t want them to kill me,” he said. “Get me out of here!”

Coe moved to the trial’s death penalty phase, a process that lasted mere minutes.

Ober displayed a photo of Grams’ injuries and spoke of the pain she’d have felt. He suggested to jurors that they had made a promise to her: nothing less than DuBoise’s death.

The defense called DuBoise’s father. Victor DuBoise Sr. entered in his wheelchair to describe his “good son” as a “typical teenager.”

None of the jurors voted for death.

That wouldn’t matter. After they’d left, Ober asked the judge to overrule.

Coe called the killing “especially wicked, evil, atrocious, and cruel.” Calmly, he ordered that DuBoise “be sentenced to die in the electric chair.”

WELCOME TO DEATH ROW

With chains running from his wrists to his ankles, DuBoise stared from the back seat of the sheriff’s cruiser, desperate to be out there in the dark fields flying by along Interstate 75.

Florida State Prison appeared as the sun was rising, green and gloomy and bigger than he’d imagined. A lieutenant stood at the back ramp barking rules. DuBoise heard none of them. For all he knew, he was going to be killed right then.

Guards marched him down a long hallway, through the general population, every door sealed tight for the arrival of a condemned prisoner.

Entering death row as the newest of more than 200 men awaiting execution, he heard the clunk, clunk, clunk, clunk of his cell door cranking open, then slamming shut. There was no mattress.

Someone tossed a note by his door, “You sure are pretty.”

DuBoise stood by the bars and screamed.

Your support makes a difference

The Marked Man is based on more than a year of research and reporting by Times reporters Christopher Spata and Dan Sullivan. They reviewed over 11,000 pages of documents and spoke with more than 50 people, including 25 hours of interviews with Robert DuBoise.

Projects like this are only possible with your support. Please consider subscribing or making a tax-deductible donation to the Times Journalism Fund.

II: Surviving a Death Sentence

There’s no easy fix to a murder conviction. it would take a moonshot..

After 502 days in county jail and a bewildering trial, Robert DuBoise’s freckled face had turned pale and scabbed with acne. Before a Florida State Prison official took his mug shot, someone chopped off the feathery rocker hair he’d kept as a way of holding onto himself.

Incarceration does not make a man a criminal, but in prison, what was the difference? His insistence that he had nothing to do with the 1983 rape and murder of Barbara Grams was all but worthless inside, except to his own small flame of dignity. Every day that passed in here was another gone forever.

That first summer, 1985, a record heat wave baked the building. DuBoise, now 20 years old, lay on the bare concrete with the roaches, trying to get cool. The place stunk of sweat. Like the 96 other men on his wing, he washed his socks in the sink and hung them from the bars to dry. His toilet leaked, making puddles of grime.

Though the state provided death row prisoners with a lawyer, DuBoise was fuzzy on what his might be doing. He had a dim sense that challenging the prosecution’s specious trial evidence would take a very long time, if it were even possible.

DuBoise had no way of knowing then what it would require to be cleared of a capital murder conviction. He would need not only a first-class legal effort, but scientific advances and the compassion of strangers. Ten years could vanish between court moves. The elements of a successful exoneration would need to line up like 7s on a slot machine.

“I knew,” he said, “it wasn’t an easy fix anymore.”

DEATH ROW DAYS

What everyone tried to avoid thinking about was the electric chair. The lights flickered whenever staff tested “Old Sparky.” The dreadful buzz of a twin-engine propeller plane meant the delivery of another death warrant signed by the governor. During DuBoise’s first year, the state executed seven men.

If the plane came for him, he imagined charging the fence, forcing the tower guards to shoot. But you only learned your warrant was signed after you were cuffed and locked down in a death watch cell.

Executions left DuBoise wracked with sadness. In prison, he learned not to judge people by their old ways but by how they treated him. Most of the inmates struck him as pretty good guys. “That’s a human life,” he thought.

Twenty-three hours a day inside a cell felt far longer. He waited for another tray of cold rice and gravy to come through the slot. He flipped through the same worn True Detective magazine. He usually managed three or four hours of sleep.

Several times a week, water ran cold over DuBoise’s shorn head in a dirty shower stall — those five minutes being, for the first few weeks, his only time outside a windowless, sickly green cell.

“The yard,” an unshaded concrete pen, was the one place death row inmates came face-to-face. DuBoise remembers seeing his first stabbing there.

The arrival of deodorant from the canteen meant Mondays. Overpriced ice cream marked Fridays — until someone melted a pint of vanilla to smuggle in a $50 bill, leading to a ban. The newscast on his cell’s tiny state-provided, black-and-white TV signaled 6 p.m. Such mundane events offered desperately needed proof that time still moved.

Many inmates tried to get pen pals to fall in love with them and send money. Writing consumed DuBoise’s days, only his letters went to the Tampa Tribune, the St. Petersburg Times and The Ledger in Lakeland. He wrote to the little weekly paper that covered the prison town, the Bradford County Telegraph. He wrote to journalists in Washington and New York, to the mayor of Tampa and the governor of Florida. He wrote to investigators in detective magazines and shows he watched, like “60 Minutes” and “20/20.” In exacting handwriting that could stretch beyond 20 pages, he’d detail his arrest, his trial, the flimsy evidence. Would someone, please, look at the facts?

Sometimes he wondered about who’d really killed Barbara Grams. Whose place was he in? Then he’d think, What’s that matter to me? But the system demands closure. To go free, there’d likely need to be an answer: If you didn’t do it, who did?

Three years had dripped by when a prison administrator appeared at the gate of his cell. DuBoise’s lawyer had gotten his death sentence reduced to life in prison.

“Are you kidding me?” DuBoise said.

“I thought you’d be happy,” the administrator said.

DuBoise wanted to fight his conviction, not his sentence. Leaving death row, he knew, meant losing his state-funded attorney. His mother could place $5, maybe $10 a week in his account, enough for stamps or ramen noodles, but hardly a lawyer. He needed help, but from where, he didn’t know.

Departing the relative calm of death row for the boisterous halls of general population meant trading the 15 highly confined inmates in his section for about 1,000 men — many of them lifers — with the freedom to roam.

The gate to DuBoise’s new cell popped open at 5 a.m. Each morning, he stood inside, alert, wondering if this would be the day men would step in to rob him or worse.

In this way, decades passed.

Decades of heavy steel doors slammed shut to seal off the wing where people were brawling. Decades of wondering if the brush of another man’s sleeve might turn deadly. Decades entombed by concrete and steel, with no shortage of items that could be ground into a sharp point. He saw about a dozen stabbings.

DuBoise navigated the finicky prison codes. He weighed letting things go against the mortal danger of appearing to be a pushover. Everyone had a hustle. “What game is this person running,” he learned to ask himself, wary of both inmates and guards.

He heated instant coffee with the current from a bare wire and toasted stale slices of wheat in a tinfoil box he’d rigged with light bulbs. It was a poor substitute for the tiny cups of espresso he enjoyed from West Tampa’s Fourth of July Cafe, always with a buttered hunk of Cuban bread. Using ingredients slipped from the kitchen, he avoided the drama of the chow hall by eating decades of American cheese sandwiches in his cell.

Years passed with sporadic family visits. “Sorry it’s been three years …” a sister would write. DuBoise never held it against them. His letters home avoided mention of his troubles, “because that’s like sentencing your loved ones to be in prison with you.” He cried when the guards called him into the chapel to tell him his father died, but those were his last tears. Emotion, he knew, gets used against you.

He was 20. Then 30. Then 40.

Work proved his saving grace. His first-ever job, he remembers, came at his own request: Could he repair the broken warmers on the carts that brought cold food to death row? After that, his aptitude for solving mechanical mysteries got him assignments servicing air conditioners and electrical fixtures, even the warden’s car. Off the clock, he’d ingratiate himself by fixing inmates’ radios or the lights in their cells.

Work acted first as a distraction, then a sort of meditation, and finally a salvation from the stigma of guilt. If he said he could fix something, then did, no one could deny he was telling the truth. No one could deny his worth. “You show (the guards) you can do that,” said a friend of DuBoise’s from prison, “and they treat you like a human.”

Countless hours passed in monkish devotion atop ladders, between walls, on rooftops and even outside the fence. His tool belt let him roam where few prisoners could.

Still, prison is prison. By the time George W. Bush became president, DuBoise had logged about nine months combined in solitary confinement for a dozen offenses, from smoking a joint to having dirt on his cell bars to possessing a jar of peanut butter. Once, when he wasn’t in his cell at the end of the day, the prison charged him with an escape attempt.

Another time, DuBoise got in trouble when, instead of listening to the guards, he’d simply “kept on writing his letter.” He never stopped writing.

“My family has no money to hire an attorney and every one I’ve written to over the years wants money first,” he wrote in April 2006 to the Innocence Project, the famed nonprofit law firm in New York. “If only I could get someone to read my case and see that I’m telling the truth and help me.”

One more plea cast into the ether.

HELP FROM OUTSIDE

By late 2006, DuBoise’s hope had dimmed. He was 41, more than half his life spent inside. His hairline receded into a widow’s peak. Wrinkles creased his forehead.

While working maintenance in the kitchen at Polk Correctional Institution, he spotted what he recognized as a civilian employee’s key ring left hanging from a door. If caught with it, he’d surely be thrown in the hole. He pocketed the keys anyway.

“Grab this,” he whispered to food service manager Lurdes Sanchez in the kitchen the following day.

“What?” the diminutive woman with long black hair answered in her heavy Nuyorican accent. “I’m not grabbing nothing.”

She glanced down and saw her keys. If he’d turned them in, she’d have lost her job, maybe even been charged with a crime.

DuBoise was working on an ice machine days later when Sanchez found him to say hello.

“Are you an idiot?” asked another inmate later. “That girl likes you.”

Next time, she appeared with a plate of tacos she’d cooked. DuBoise noticed how hurt she looked when he explained he was vegetarian. He took extra care in telling her it was nothing personal.

Sanchez was divorced, in her 40s. He crafted her a jewelry box. She snuck in Calvin Klein cologne. They shared discreet “kisses” by sipping soda from the same straw. “He’d turn so red,” Sanchez said. Later, they’d actually kiss in the walk-in refrigerator. Soon DuBoise was sending letters to her teenage daughter, Lisette, too. He imagined adopting her, thinking he’d probably have a daughter her age if he’d stayed free. Strict rules barred relationships with inmates, but Sanchez believed in DuBoise’s innocence enough that she quit.

The 25th anniversary of the killing of Barbara Grams was approaching, along with DuBoise’s first chance at parole. In 2007, Sanchez, by then his fiancée, drove to Tallahassee with his mother to face the commission that would decide whether he was suitable for release.

A 10-minute timer began to tick down. There were mistakes in his case, the women pleaded. “My son,” Myra DuBoise sobbed, “is innocent.”

The commissioners interrupted. They weren’t there, they said, to retry the case.

They turned to a woman who read a letter by Grams’ mother, who described how she’d been kept from seeing her daughter’s body because it had been so disfigured.

“Exceptionally brutal,” the commissioners called the crime. They said DuBoise’s release could “cause unreasonable risk.” They set his presumptive parole date in the year 2094, when he’d be 130.

He’d get another parole hearing soon enough, they said. “See you again in five years.”

THE PROMISE OF DNA

DuBoise’s disappointment was tempered, if only because he had another plan.

For years, he’d watched “World News Tonight” and “48 Hours.” He read USA Today and any local newspapers he could get, paying particular attention to murder cases and DNA analysis.

First introduced as evidence in a criminal court in 1986 — a year after his own trial — DNA had proliferated, even leading to exonerations. He’d heard it was possible to file a motion for post-conviction DNA testing.

For how much media attention DNA exonerations could attract, it seemed maddeningly tough to convince the state to dig up or test evidence. Even then, DNA results might not set someone free. But maybe they might be a start.

DuBoise’s fiancée and sister found a lawyer willing to work for cheap, and by 2008, they’d managed to get a hearing on a request to test DNA evidence. His family felt so sure he’d go free that Sanchez packed him jeans and a button-down, which sat folded on the seat of her car as DuBoise stepped once more into a Tampa courtroom.

At the bench was a new judge — a fresh set of eyes that gave DuBoise hope.

The judge who’d presided over his trial 23 years earlier was dead. Harry Lee Coe III had gone on to win election as Hillsborough County’s state attorney. Years later, media reports revealed he’d sunk into gambling debt and borrowed money from employees. Amid the scandal, Coe took his own life.

Mark Ober, the popular lawyer who’d sent DuBoise to prison, succeeded Coe as the elected state attorney.

Now one of Ober’s assistant prosecutors would be fighting the challenge to one of his signature wins.

Meanwhile, DuBoise’s inexpensive lawyer seemed overmatched. She told the court that DuBoise had testified at his trial. He hadn’t. And in a bizarre move, she suggested that DNA testing would turn up not DuBoise’s DNA, but his brother’s and a friend’s. That would have only bolstered the theory that all three men had participated in the killing.

Another blow: DuBoise’s best shot at DNA evidence — biological swabs, nail clippings and hair samples from the autopsy — had been destroyed. Disposed, the evidence log said, in 1990, during a routine post-appeals cleanout. Rape kit samples taken by the medical examiner, a detective told the court, were also long gone.

What remained were microscope slides with hair and debris from the scene, but experts said the chemical process to unseal those slides likely would destroy any DNA. There seemed to be nothing else to test.

The prosecutor argued that they shouldn’t bother. After all, a witness had claimed DuBoise confessed.

DuBoise couldn’t believe the pushback. Why not just test those slides and see?

“I have never bombarded this court with frivolous filings,” he wrote to the judge. “I have never tried to beat this case by technicalities. ... I am asking that you test evidence. Not someone’s word or speculation.”

Three weeks later, the judge ruled: No.

Not long after, Sanchez moved to New Jersey to work as a nurse caretaker, a job she needed after spending so much on DuBoise’s lawyers. She kept the wedding dress she’d bought and said she’d intended to stay engaged. But DuBoise felt sure she’d met someone new.

How could he really know, with this chasm separating their worlds? They may have still loved each other, but their relationship required a level of trust that prison blighted. He wrote to her to say they should both move on.

It hurt, losing the dream of a family yet again, but he wasn’t mad at her. No one, he thought, could wait forever. And maybe it was easier for him, too. In prison, the harder someone holds on to the outside, the worse it hurts.

ONE LAST CHANCE

Parole was all that remained, so he tried playing that game anew. In 2012, he provided the commission with certificates from the sorts of self-help courses he’d heard they liked, such as anger management classes, and his recent baptism.

Denied. See you in five years.

In 2017, his records showed no disciplinary incidents in nearly two decades. The commission wanted remorse. “I can’t be remorseful,” he said, “for something that I didn’t do.”

Denied. See you in seven years.

Sunlight blanketed the path before DuBoise the day he got news of that last rejection. He walked the concrete stretch between prison buildings called “the street.” He was in his mid-50s. No appeals left. He rubbed his hands together and said a little prayer.

Sometime after that, his eye caught his name on a sheet posted by a door. Legal mail. That puzzled him. Eight years had passed since any court activity.

The next morning, he picked up an envelope from the mailroom. It bore a return address from the Innocence Project — 13 years after he’d first written.

Within a week, he sat across from a sharply dressed young woman born in Brooklyn the year he got locked up. Susan Friedman held degrees in law and biomedical sciences. She had expertise in emerging DNA technology and experience representing people whose convictions rested on unreliable forensic science. She’d visited plenty of prisons, but the first thing she noticed about DuBoise was how respectfully the guards treated him, like no prisoner she’d seen before.

As his new lawyer spoke, DuBoise heard things he’d always believed about his case but had been helpless to prove — things about bite mark evidence and jailhouse informants. Finally, someone was promising to unravel what happened in 1983.

What DuBoise didn’t know was that it was good timing at last in Hillsborough County. It had only taken 35 years.

A different kind of state attorney — for Tampa, at least — had swept into town.

Andrew Warren, a wiry, polished, progressive politician, stood before a few dozen local lawyers and judges in early 2020. They’d gathered for a luncheon at a downtown law center, and Warren was the featured speaker — there to showcase a new initiative.

“From my first days as a prosecutor, I had the same concern that all good prosecutors should,” Warren said over clanking cutlery. “What happens if I get it wrong?”

Warren four years earlier had shocked the Tampa establishment by winning the job of top prosecutor in old-school Hillsborough County. The ambitious political newcomer, who’d mostly been a white-collar federal prosecutor outside Florida, managed to unseat Ober by riding a wave of support for criminal justice reform.

Imagine, Warren told the crowd, that of the 15,000 felony prosecutions his office handled each year, they got 99.9% right. “That means in 15 cases a year, people are wrongfully convicted.”

To that end, he’d created Hillsborough’s conviction review unit to investigate closed cases in which defendants claimed innocence. With far easier access to case files, evidence and witnesses, Warren said, prosecutors can investigate such claims in ways defense lawyers simply can’t. That efficiency can spare innocent people years or decades behind bars. Similar review entities had cropped up across the country as false convictions made big news.

To run it, Warren had selected another outsider to Tampa’s insular legal scene. Teresa Hall was short and self-assured, with a disarming Midwestern folksiness. She was right for the job, she believed, in part because of her respect for street-level police work. Before taking up law in her mid-30s, she’d started her career as a paramedic in Indianapolis, working alongside cops.

“It’s one thing to sit in an office,” she says, “but it’s another when you’re in the home and someone’s brains are splattered all over the wall.”

Reviewing convictions required a willingness to highlight uncomfortable mistakes from inside an organization — something she’d done in a previous gig, assessing a hospital’s treatment of its patients. Warren hired her, in a way, to do that again.

It could get isolating, being the lone lawyer scrutinizing convictions in an office filled with lawyers working to secure them. Hall believed her prosecutor colleagues got things right most of the time. Everyone treated her cordially, but she knew some rolled their eyes, thinking: That’s what defense attorneys and appeals courts are for.

To those who said her work was a waste of time, she’d reply: There are about 3,000 people in the national database of exonerees who may disagree.

At the luncheon, Hall took the microphone after her boss and explained how prisoners’ petitions came to her. A few were typed by defense attorneys. Others arrived from prison cells, barely legible, scrawled in faded ink.

They told tales of injustice, convoluted yarns about malfeasance and faulty forensics. Asked to explain why they were innocent, many delivered a generic refrain: Because I didn’t do it .

Each time, Hall imagined that she was re-prosecuting the case. Could she convict this person again? Most often, her answer was yes.

In her first year, hundreds of petitions and their files filled her cubbyhole of an office. She moved to a larger space, and again the banker boxes piled toward the ceiling. After 15 months, she had not recommended freeing anyone.

The day that Hall spoke, another months-old petition waited on her desk, this one in the case of the State v. Robert Earl DuBoise.

DIGGING INTO DUBOISE

In February 2020, when Hall started reading the 156-page document the Innocence Project filed on DuBoise’s behalf, she bristled.

The petition, in her opinion, went over the top in disparaging Tampa police and prosecutors, as if they’d been willfully out to get DuBoise in 1983.

As Hall read on, however, she couldn’t deny the case’s weakness.

Friedman, the Innocence Project lawyer, had left the prison after her first meeting with DuBoise determined to begin her own step-by-step reinvestigation of the murder of Barbara Grams.

Police reports, trial transcripts, interviews with experts — she’d collected it all. She flew to Tampa, drove to the site of the long-gone mall, to Grams’ home and the unremarkable path behind a dentist’s office where the young woman died. Then Friedman had put together a blow-by-blow account of the holes in the case.

First, the bite mark. Friedman referenced several studies underscoring the fallibility of bite mark analysis. One found that forensic dentists got it wrong as much as 91% of the time. Another found a 63% error rate. There was a lack of standards for expert testimony on bite mark analysis, she noted, and nationwide, she cited 26 forensic dentists who’d been involved in 31 wrongful convictions secured through bite marks.

These days, dentists are barred from testifying that a particular mark is a “match” to a set of teeth. In addition, the National Academy of Sciences and other research groups have concluded that bite mark analysis has little basis in science.

Friedman would later obtain the help of Adam Freeman, a former president of the American Board of Forensic Odontology. He identified problem after problem with the DuBoise case, from untrained police using beeswax — a medium that can easily distort — to low-quality Polaroids taken of Grams’ skin.

The biggest error he saw was the oddly shaped wound itself. It was, he believed, not a bite mark at all.

Then there was the analysis of Richard Souviron, the dentist who’d insisted in court that DuBoise had bitten Grams. He had retracted his testimony in similar cases.

Back in Tampa, Hall, too, pulled the case files, police reports and trial transcripts to begin a review of her own. Some 3,500 pages of documents arrived around March 2020, just as the world shut down. Hall placed the massive stack on her dining room table and reviewed them from a recliner with a TV tray as a desk.

She noted that Souviron and another dentist who had been consulted in the case had told police the biter may have gaps in his upper front teeth. DuBoise had none.

She found unsettling the fact that police and prosecutors said DuBoise killed Grams with his brother and a friend but had only charged DuBoise.

Documents concerning jailhouse informant Claude Butler seemed particularly curious.

When he spoke up, Butler had been facing a possible life sentence after pleading guilty to robbery and kidnapping charges. Days after first telling prosecutors about DuBoise’s supposed confession, he received five years. And soon after he testified, a document appeared in his file. No promises had been made, it said, but “the interests of justice” required a mitigated sentence. Signed, Mark Ober.

Butler walked free.

Hall searched for Butler, hoping he could explain. When he finally called her back, he was two states and a lifetime away from his troubled youth in Tampa. Hall asked if he had been offered anything in exchange for testifying.

Butler told Hall that he stood by his claims. He described again DuBoise’s supposed confession, adding, “He got this glazed look in his eyes, like he was reliving it.”

Butler’s account struck Hall as odd. She hung up, still questioning his credibility.

Other than the bite-mark testimony and jailhouse informant — both red flags for wrongful convictions — nothing showed that DuBoise and Barbara Grams had known each other. No one said they’d ever seen them together. Hall saw nothing tying DuBoise to the crime.

A STUNNING DISCOVERY

Hall was not expecting to like Friedman, but she couldn’t help it.

As the women talked on the phone, they discussed their growing sense of DuBoise’s innocence. Convincing a judge, Hall cautioned, might take something stronger, like DNA.

Most DNA evidence had been destroyed, but Hall knew the Tampa Police Department still had some odds and ends from the scene, so in the summer of 2020 she asked to see whatever was left.

Days later, Hall stood inside a cramped evidence room as personnel laid out butcher paper. They wheeled in boxes and crates and crumpled brown bags. With gloved hands, they unearthed plaster casts, teeth models, fingerprint cards, cigarette butts. They laid out DuBoise’s old wallet and a copy of his work schedule.

As it began to seem less likely that there was DNA to test, Hall chatted idly with Tampa police Detective Joseph Sustek, who was supervising. He’d heard that medical examiners sometimes keep rape kits of murder victims.

Hall, leaving disappointed, didn’t dwell on the remark. In late July, remembering what Sustek had said, she emailed the medical examiner to ask if, by some long shot, they might have anything. A morgue supervisor unbolted a secure room, unlocked a small, refrigerated drawer and browsed samples from homicides dating back to the 1960s. There they were: three tiny, glass plates, smeared and dyed red, purple and white — samples taken from a body.

A label on each bore handwriting: Grams . Dated 8-19-83 .

No one had ever asked or thought to look.

Hall called the Florida Department of Law Enforcement about testing, but that would likely take months.

To bypass the bureaucratic grind, the Innocence Project offered to pay for testing at a lab in California. Hall wanted an assurance: The state would get the results, even if they wound up proving DuBoise guilty.

On Aug. 17, 2020, DuBoise was working maintenance at Hardee Correctional Institution when officers called him into an office. A prison nurse took out two cotton swabs.

“Open your mouth,” he was told.

He felt the stick scraping his tongue and cheek.

A nurse had DuBoise sign the envelope, marked with a biohazard symbol.

Three days later, Hall was watching an episode of “The Big Bang Theory” at home when her phone chimed.

The lab in California had found epithelial cells — the kind that slough off from skin or other tissue — on the Grams autopsy slides, Friedman told her. Sperm cells, too.

None of it belonged to Robert DuBoise.

The next evening, Hall sat with friends in Ybor City along the sidewalk of Seventh Avenue, people-watching and puffing an Acid cigar with a sweet tip. Her phone chimed again.

Another lab had examined the results, this one with access to an FBI database with the names of millions of felons across the U.S. The sperm cell DNA had produced a match. It wasn’t DuBoise’s brother or their friend Ray Garcia.

It was a man in prison. He was serving a life sentence for another murder in the Tampa Bay area committed on Oct. 22, 1983 — the same day DuBoise was arrested. In a report, he would be referred to as “Person X.”

DuBoise got a call on Monday morning, strange in itself, because inmates could not receive calls. The guards brought him to a back room of the dormitory. On the phone was Friedman, her assistant, two paralegals and several interns at the Innocence Project. Everyone who’d worked on his case.

“You’re going to be free,” Friedman told him. “And they know who really did it.”

III: Who Killed Barbara Grams?

While police targeted robert duboise during tampa’s ‘summer of hell,’ a murder spree went undetected..

Robert DuBoise pulled up to a Love’s truck stop in Jasper, Florida, hauling a semi full of Tropicana orange juice. It was August 2022, almost two years after he walked beyond the razor-topped prison gate into a new, free life. He threw his clothes in the coin laundry and slid into a booth with a coffee.

Cleared, finally, of the murder he didn’t commit as a teenager, DuBoise was 57. His youth was gone. He couldn’t go back to 1983 and make investigators connect the sparse clues sooner. He’d have to settle for the truth, however belatedly it had arrived.

On the truck stop TV he recognized Andrew Warren, the state attorney who’d reviewed his wrongful conviction and facilitated his release.

Warren was talking about two middle-aged faces staring blankly from mug shots — Amos Robinson and Abron Scott.

These were the real killers of 19-year-old Barbara Grams, Warren announced. And, he asserted, she wasn’t their only victim.

‘JAMMED UP WITH HOMICIDES’

The summer of 1983 became, in the words of one cop, a “summer of hell.” Murder cases piled up.

By Halloween, Robinson and Scott would be captured and charged with killing a man. But their links to a series of other murders and rapes — borne out in court documents and new charges — would stay hidden for decades.

With the DNA brought to light by DuBoise’s case as a catalyst, Robinson and Scott are now directly tied to three 1983 murder cases, when the young friends were 18 and 20 years old.

Neither man spoke to the Times for this story.

Beyond the crimes these two men are accused of, the summer of 1983 unfolded in chaos and bloodshed.

When Grams’ body was found behind a dentist’s office, detectives were already swamped. Women’s slain bodies had been turning up in public places in quick succession.

The killings alone weren’t an anomaly given the overall number of homicides, but eight dead women from July to early October with no immediate suspects? People were scared.

As police insisted there were no connections between the crimes, newspapers kept the grim tally. A woman’s nude body was found wrapped in a blanket outside a Busch Gardens-area Burger King; a student was drowned in a ditch after playing Pac-Man at a convenience store; a nurse’s aide was run down by a car and left in a Seminole Heights alley.

Someone raped and stabbed a young woman behind a Thonotosassa gas station. A slain runaway, only 14, was discovered semi-clothed and dumped in the woods near Oldsmar City Hall.

“We don’t have a mad killer (on the) loose,” a police spokesperson told the Tampa Tribune in August after reporters kept asking.

In some of the crimes, that assertion proved true. As fall approached, police apprehended three suspects who confessed or pleaded guilty. Then they arrested DuBoise. Another case closed.

But the remaining homicides stumped detectives until DuBoise went free and modern technology offered fresh leads. Only now can a fuller story be told.

The summer of 1983 began as skyscrapers were rising in the little downtown and concrete spread among the palm trees. Leaders saw the once-sleepy port city as a magnet for opportunity. “Tampa,” went the slogan, “where the good life gets better every day.”

Some locals were still scraping by, like 41-year-old Linda Lansen.

Lansen spent much of Sunday, July 10, with her cats and two birds in the little central Tampa apartment that doubled as her darkroom.

Photography was a newer ambition for the divorced, single mom, but it was going well. Tampa’s top radio station, Q105, had hired her to shoot its crowded “Q-Zoo” events where listeners dove into pools of Jell-O to win a car.

She called her mom that afternoon and told her she’d earned $40 photographing the Bunny of the Year contest at the Playboy Club in St. Petersburg the night before. She’d get $40 more when she developed the film, helping her make the $147 rent.

After eating potato soup, Lansen got into her Dodge Diplomat with the Q105 stickers and drove off into the summer evening. The Dodge had no air conditioning, but she could roll down the windows. She didn’t tell anyone where she was going.

Kids found her purse near a creek later that night. Tampa police discovered her car ditched on a residential street. They peered in with flashlights and wondered aloud: Another murder?

A morning walker spotted Lansen’s body in the weeds near a dead end of Old Memorial Highway, barefoot and stripped below the waist. Bruises marked her lower legs and feet, as though she’d been kicking something. A blood-stained white towel shrouded her head, marked by four small bullet wounds.

Detectives questioned the Q105 DJ, Scott Shannon, on whom she’d had a crush. They queried classmates at Hillsborough Community College, where she’d taken photography and psychology classes, and men with whom she’d had casual flings. They talked to her ex-husband.

They lifted fingerprints from a window in her Dodge, but they wouldn’t find any matches for decades. With little to go on, the prints were filed away, and the investigation went cold.

A few weeks after Lansen was killed, Barbara Grams was attacked as she walked home from the mall — left, raped and beaten, with a suspected bite mark on her cheek. What would later become key evidence from her autopsy was stowed away in the medical examiner’s office and forgotten.

Weeks after that, a woman’s body was found by firefighters in the trunk of her burning car.

Herminia Grillo Castro, a 57-year-old seamstress, had driven to the Krispy Kreme on North Florida Avenue to drop off her sister-in-law, who worked the early shift. She never made it home.

The car smoldered in a field near Memorial Park Cemetery. Castro had been shot in the head with a shotgun. A gold ring was still on her finger, but a gold cross necklace and a medal that read “World’s Greatest Grandmother” were missing.

Police drew anger by chasing suspicions that a Castro family member might be involved. They followed another relative’s off-the-cuff speculation that “this was Cuban work.” When struggling investigators asked the grandmother’s family to do their own digging, her daughter felt the cops were clueless.

Witnesses wouldn’t talk for years. Her case stalled, too.

Decades later, Mark Ober, who’d prosecuted DuBoise, remembered authorities were “jammed up with homicides.”

“We had more,” he said, “than we could deal with.”

Aside from the killings, Tampa felt infected with corruption and tragedy in 1983. It was the year a man entered a Winn-Dixie east of Tampa, doused shoppers with gasoline and lit a flame. Three county commissioners were convicted of extortion, and a circuit judge faced trial for misconduct. So much cocaine flowed into Florida that the drug dropped to bargain prices.

Public fears were ushering in a “tough on crime” era nationwide, along with the roaring return of capital punishment. Florida led the country in executions.

The media took particular interest in Grams’ killing. Maybe it was the unusual “bite mark.” Maybe it was because she was young and pretty. Maybe it was where she worked. Everyone knew the Tampa Bay Center mall.

Even DuBoise had occasionally strolled past the chlorinated fountain or ridden the glass elevator to the second level of the mall where Grams had a job at the Hot Potato. They could have been friends, had they ever met. They knew some of the same people.

The same October night police arrested DuBoise in connection with her slaying, Amos Robinson and Abron Scott, the killers whose faces DuBoise would see on the news 40 years later, cornered a new victim as he left a bar across town.

ROBINSON AND SCOTT

Long before they were getting drunk and high, robbing gamblers of their pool-hall winnings, cruising dark streets in stolen cars and stashing them down the block so their parents wouldn’t see, Amos Robinson and Abron Scott grew up amid violence.

Court testimony and interviews with those who’ve known them paint a dismal picture.

Both were misfits who became troubled teens, shipped off at the same age to live with their fathers across the state — reunions that ultimately didn’t change their course.

Scott was broad and burly. Family called him “Spike,” and other kids tormented him with “egghead” for his misshapen skull. His brother shoved him from a parked car as a toddler, inflicting a head injury. A neighborhood boy cracked him with a bat at age 9, knocking him unconscious. His mother’s boyfriends hit him, too.

When Scott and his siblings gathered their mother’s bottles of booze, they drank the leftovers. When their mother convulsed from drinking, they held her down. At their apartment in North Boulevard Homes, a West Tampa housing project, Scott cried a lot. He went to school drunk.

In his early teens, he reconnected with his father, a pastor in Cocoa. He joined the Cocoa High School wrestling team but dropped out of school.

“It was just hard for him to trust me,” the Rev. Abron Scott Sr. said in court years later. “Mostly he just wanted to be accepted, wanted to be wanted again.”

He couldn’t read a job application, his family said, or make change. His IQ was pegged in the 50s or 60s, low enough to be considered mentally disabled.

When Scott’s older sister found a stable home in Oldsmar, she brought teenage “Spike” along.

He cut grass or labored at the docks for a little money, but he blew it quickly, going to dances on weekends and picking up drugs like “black beauties” and cocaine. Out came paranoia, a guy who liked to fight.

He first crossed paths with Robinson in a juvenile home. A group of boys was wrestling, and Scott pinned the baddest of the bunch. An impressed Robinson shook his hand.

Robinson was smaller and nearly two years older. His family had a touch more stability. “Middle class,” he’d insist to detectives. He ran track and played youth baseball in Graceville, near the Alabama line. His mother worked as a lumber mill machine operator.

Disturbing signs emerged early, like when he hit his sister with a glass vase, sending her to the hospital. Relatives remembered him as “devilish” for the things he did to cats, dogs and other kids. He once told a family member he enjoyed seeing others in pain.

At 14, Robinson went to live with his father, Amos Sr., in Tampa. Trouble followed: At 15, purse snatching. At 17, a robbery. He was held at the adult jail with grown men, but he still proved to be a danger.

A 1981 police report describes a man brought to jail immediately fending off other detainees, including Robinson, who ordered the young new arrival into the showers. Robinson got two years in prison for the rape.

Weeks after that assault, Scott, then 16, landed in the same jail for robbery. He recognized Robinson from the juvenile home. Other inmates threatened the new kid, but Robinson stopped them. “That’s what kind of, like, tied us in a little bit,” Scott said years later.

The pair met as boys but emerged from incarceration, legally speaking, as men.

Scott had been out for a few months, working for a company that repaired X-ray machines, when Robinson was released and showed up at Scott’s house looking to hang out.

After prison, Robinson found steady work at a Morrison’s cafeteria in downtown Tampa, impressing manager Marla Dubinsky with his tidy appearance and punctuality.

She knew about his robbery and sexual battery conviction but believed him when he said he didn’t want to go back. She entrusted him with $6,000 cash deposits and assigned him to help with catering. He worried, she remembered in court, about a female employee walking alone at night.

Robinson would sometimes appear at Scott’s sister’s home in Oldsmar unannounced, letting himself in to watch TV or take Scott to bars. “Disrespectful,” was how Scott’s family saw him. “Mean.”

When Scott lost his job, he said years later, he spent more time with Robinson, fighting in bars and strong-arming people for cash.

Scott’s brother-in-law went to a bar with them once. A fight erupted over a woman. When a man hit the floor, Robinson grabbed a bar stool and beat him bloody. He was pulled away and told he couldn’t do that to people.

“He scared me,” the brother-in-law said in court. “He wanted to take everything he wanted.”

END OF THE ROAD

After sundown, a certain stretch of Kennedy Boulevard became “the meanest street in town,” populated with sex workers and bikers, drunk brawlers and “sweating muscle men” darkening doorways, the Tampa Tribune wrote in 1983. On the night of Friday, Oct. 21, Scott and Robinson joined the chaos.

Their night started at Robinson’s house in Riverside Heights, where they chatted with Robinson’s parents before walking to a nearby lounge. They sipped from a bottle of Seagram’s gin en route to a dive on Nebraska Avenue, then Manila Bar in Ybor City. They drank beers and snorted cocaine.

They were drunk and high and looking for someone to rob by the time they walked down Kennedy, a few blocks east of downtown, into a parking lot outside the Old Plantation Lounge.

Earlier that night, Carlos Orellana’s sister saw her brother getting ready to go out. To her, Orellana was the man of the house, her adviser and protector. He’d immigrated as a young man with his family from their native Honduras. He held multiple jobs, learned to speak five languages and hoped to be a professor. The staff at the Old Plantation, which catered to gay men, remembered the 33-year-old sitting alone with a Dewar’s, wearing a tuxedo shirt and cummerbund.

When Orellana left the bar after midnight and stepped toward his beige Toyota Celica with his keys in hand, Robinson and Scott approached.

They pushed Orellana against his car. They punched him. They choked him unconscious and shoved him into the back seat. Scott steered west on Hillsborough Avenue and out of the city. They passed the sign reading “Oldsmar, the last of the new frontiers.” Scott turned on an unfinished road and drove until it became dirt and trees.

It was dark. Orellana fought back. “Let me run the guy over,” Robinson suggested. When he tried, the man kept fighting with Scott.

“Take the car,” Orellana pleaded weakly. “Leave me alone.”

Scott got in, pressed the gas and crushed Orellana into the ground.

The car got stuck in the sand, the men later said, so they went to a bar down the road and asked two guys with trucks for help. The helpers apparently didn’t notice the body as they used chains to free the Toyota. They handed Robinson and Scott a couple of Busch beers, then left before the killers drove away in the dead man’s car. Robinson went to work a few hours later.

Why kill Orellana, when they could have just robbed him, ditched him and taken his car? A prosecutor asked Scott decades later.

“Don’t ask me, ma’am,” he replied. “I don’t know.”

CHASING KILLERS

The next day, Scott and Robinson pulled up outside a house in Tampa. They told two friends the Toyota belonged to Scott.

After more gin and cocaine, the men climbed in for a ride. One noticed a cassette of ABBA’s Greatest Hits Vol. 2. That seemed odd for Scott’s taste. Then he noticed blood.

Scott pulled up near railroad tracks in East Tampa, where he and Robinson tossed out credit cards and a checkbook. The items belonged, they told the men in the back seat, to some guy they’d “hit” the night before.

Their joyride led them across the bay to Clearwater, to another parking lot and another robbery.

A call went out over police radio: Purse snatching outside the Countryside Mall. Toyota Celica. A young Dunedin officer named Bob Gualtieri launched into pursuit. The officer’s headlights followed the car as it zipped over dark lawns and plowed down a mailbox, then crashed in some bushes. Four men bailed out. Gualtieri, the future Pinellas County sheriff, grabbed one.

The man Gualtieri arrested gave the names of the others. Police soon arrested a friend who’d ridden in the back seat, and both told officers matching stories about Robinson and Scott bragging as they’d dumped evidence.

Days later, a construction worker pulled up to the isolated road, dead-ending into weeds and forest. He noticed men’s slip-on shoes, two Busch cans and a foul smell.

Tire tracks formed deep grooves leading to a divot where Orellana lay on his back.

NOWHERE LEFT TO RUN

The following day, 300 miles north, police surrounded a little house in Graceville, Robinson’s hometown. Robinson’s mother said he wasn’t home, but police caught him and Scott as they slipped out the back door.

We found the body, detectives said.

“I don’t want to go to prison,” Robinson said, his eyes welling.

He was quiet, then spoke quickly. Scott had moved first, he said, pushing Orellana against the car.

A sheriff’s plane carried the men home, where they’d be charged with murder. They said little over the din of wind and engines, but when they landed, Scott asked to talk to his friend alone. They spoke briefly in a hangar before Scott turned to a detective.

“It was an accident,” Scott said. “It was not meant to be a murder.”

When Scott later gave his full account, it was mostly the same, except he blamed Robinson for attacking first.

“We smoked a lot of cocaine and drank a lot. I can’t remember it all,” Scott said. “But I know I was involved.”

At their trials, attorneys for each suggested the other man was more to blame. Psychologists described each as “a follower.” Scott, his attorney said, was “a child in a man’s body.”

It didn’t matter. Robinson and Scott soon became the newest residents of Florida’s death row. No more than 200 feet away sat a bewildered Robert DuBoise, unsure whether he’d ever get out.

PROBED IN MORE KILLINGS

Robinson and Scott ultimately had their sentences changed to life in prison on appeal.

In one hearing, Orellana’s mother urged a judge to keep Robinson on death row, then collapsed, sobbing, on a courtroom table.

“I’m sorry what I did,” Robinson said.

“You have to say that to God,” Orellana’s sister told him.

Over the years, cold case detectives probed the men for links to other crimes.

In the early 1990s, a grand jury charged Robinson and his brother with murdering Herminia Castro, the grandmother found in her burnt car weeks after the Grams slaying. Scott was implicated but not charged.

Witnesses — some relatives of Robinson’s — had come forward after years of fear. They described sitting outside an apartment one morning in 1983 and seeing a car erupt in flames.

They recounted seeing the men running through a nearby cemetery and appearing outside the home, boasting that they’d “hit a good lick.” From one man’s pocket came a ring, a gold cross necklace, a Timex watch and cash.

“Did you hear that lady screaming and begging for her life?” a woman heard Robinson utter. “I just put the old bitch out of her misery.”

Others gave inconsistent accounts, though, and shortly before trial, a witness gave Robinson and the other man an alibi. The charges were tossed. Castro’s homicide remains unsolved.

Other open homicides from that era include Rose Haney, the 14-year-old runaway who turned up dead in a wooded lot in Oldsmar the same month that Orellana was killed less than a mile away. No suspects have been named.

In prison, Robinson remained a threat. In 1998, he stabbed and stomped to death 22-year-old Arturi Verra, who other prisoners said was trying to end their sexual relationship. He spent years in solitary confinement. In 2004, he beat to death 29-year-old cellmate Sang Nguyen during a sexual encounter.

In 2007, improved technology matched a print from Lansen’s driver’s-side window to Scott’s left thumb. Detectives went to question Robinson about his old friend. Robinson refused to talk. But as they rose to leave, he blurted out: “What did he do? Rape and kill a lady?”

Investigators tried DNA testing the Lansen evidence then, but the science wasn’t yet advanced enough. More than a decade later, when the pair’s DNA turned up in the Grams slaying, investigators tried again, using enhanced analysis. They matched Scott to a bloody towel. Samples from Lansen’s rape kit matched both men.

Scott and Robinson, charged in both Grams’ and Lansen’s murders, remain persons of interest in at least three other unsolved cases throughout Tampa Bay.

Had the conviction review unit not uncovered the DNA evidence in DuBoise’s case, Lansen’s family might still be without answers.

“There are no words to describe what it’s like to go through 39 years of grief and not knowing what happened,” Lansen’s niece, Linda Sheffield, said in 2022. “The void stays and the pain stays and the crying stays, it doesn’t go away.”

In the years after DuBoise’s release, as he realized there were only a handful of people on Earth who could relate to his experience, he’d sometimes think of the victims’ families. He’d only seen them on TV, but he felt a kinship.

He imagined they also knew how it felt to lose so much, to live with a black hole of uncertainty. Surely they understood, as he now did, that a person can be happy after tragedy, but the pain goes on, too.

That, sometimes, evil steps into your life. There’s no peace in asking why.

IV: After Prison, a Search for a Good Life

Exoneree robert duboise adjusts to freedom, even as some doubt his innocence..

In his first nights of freedom, after the hugs and the cameras and the celebratory lunch, when Robert DuBoise was finally alone — maybe the most alone he’d ever been — he opened his front door, stepped onto the damp grass and stared in awe at the midnight sky.

He settled into one of four pale yellow cabins on the property of the Sunny Center, a small foundation in Tampa’s Lowry Park North offering housing to exonerees. Normalcy came slowly.

In a single day, 186 Amazon packages arrived with clothes and household items from people who’d heard his story. Much of it he gave away. “I didn’t know what to do with an Instant Pot,” he said. Another day, he took his fraying 1980s driver’s license in for renewal, and the clerk gawked. He bought a pickup truck, then stumped a car insurance agent: “It’s like you don’t exist.”

In some ways, he was haunting his old life while trying to make something of what was left. He felt it was only fair that the people and institutions who’d stolen 37 years pay up and admit their wrongs, but he’d also have to live knowing there were powerful people who still insisted he was a killer.

What was he to do with all this freedom, anyway? Was it too late to realize his old dreams?

Freedom, at first, left DuBoise exhausted.

For decades, he’d earned nothing for his labor. He felt compelled to make up for that now. He got handyman and remodeling jobs by referral from the Sunny Center’s volunteer manager, Dorothy Wheeler.

Tampa had grown huge and chaotic to DuBoise’s eyes. He made sandwiches to hand out to the homeless as he cruised streets he’d known by heart but which now felt overstuffed and strange. He’d never seen a Walmart or a Home Depot.

A giant cowboy boot sculpture in a Publix parking lot caught his eye, and he realized the last time he’d been there, the sprawling Shoppes at Boot Ranch plaza was an actual cattle ranch. At the site of the grubby upholstery shop where he used to work stood an immaculate apartment complex. The Journey’s End, a cinderblock biker dive where he’d met the crush who’d testified against him, was a ghost of its former self.

“I didn’t have one friend left,” DuBoise said. His closest buddy from the shop had died, as had the man’s son, whom DuBoise had held as a baby. His sister, Harriet, who’d greeted him at the prison gates, died from COVID-19 months later.

Lurdes Sanchez, his ex-fiancée, saw him on the news and texted him, but responding felt like opening a wound that had long scabbed over.

Sometimes he felt out of step with his family’s quotidian complaints. How were so many people so negative when they’d woken up free?

His new iPhone buzzed day and night — overwhelming. “How you doing?” cousins and well-wishers asked when he picked up. “Good,” he said, “but I don’t have nothing else to talk about right now.”

His health had suffered in prison. A surgeon inside had removed part of his thyroid, but after his release, a doctor said he should have taken medication for years. He was anemic, possibly from his prison diet of mostly American cheese sandwiches. A doctor suggested giving up his vegetarianism.

He found pleasure in small things, like a slice of pizza by the water at Ballast Point Park. Staffers he’d befriended at a doctor’s office insisted on bringing him there, then to Dairy Joy for ice cream.

On the subject of joy, DuBoise spoke measuredly, but he did use the term “amazing” to describe one thing — encountering children again.

Wheeler, the manager, was becoming a close friend. She invited DuBoise to her daughter’s wedding. When the bride’s toddler, May, met DuBoise at the reception, she raised her arms. He scooped the girl up. She rested her head on his shoulder and fell asleep under a pink “Trolls” blanket. He held her for hours. Wheeler occasionally asked if he needed a break.

“No,” he’d reply. “I’m good.”

In 2006, at age 40, he’d written from prison: “I always had a goal in life and that is to have a wife and children. I know I’m still young enough to meet this goal.” In 2021, at 56, he conceded to a documentary interviewer: “That wasn’t the case, of course.”

Still, DuBoise expressed gratitude for his new life to anyone who asked, and also in his prayers.

He enjoyed driving again, traversing wide-open spaces in solitude, listening to JOY-FM Christian radio. He trained to become a long-haul truck driver.

His first trip was to California. He slept in the Mojave Desert when he couldn’t make it to a truck stop before his mandated rest time, and he saw the sun rise over the Sierra Nevada on his way back. It was good, for a while.

An idea had crept back in: Maybe there was time. Maybe he could adopt children if he had the money and a house to raise them.

FIGHTING FOR COMPENSATION

The state told DuBoise he was owed nothing.

Florida law pays exonerees $50,000 for each year they spent in prison, but the state’s “clean hands” rule bars those with prior felonies. DuBoise had stolen tools from a car and siphoned gas as a teenager.

He fought for the money, and his dignity, by taking off his work boots and donning a crisp gray suit to trek the four hours to Tallahassee week after week. He walked with lobbyists through state Capitol halls and shook hands with legislators, his pleading eyes searching their faces as he asked them to pass a bill awarding him $1.85 million.

Then he sued the Tampa Police Department, retired Detectives Kenneth Burke and Phillip Saladino, the estate of their former boss, the late Detective John Counsman, and dentist Richard Souviron. The complaint claimed detectives conspired with the dentist to “fabricate” a match.

The suit accused detectives of excluding evidence that could have helped DuBoise — chiefly that they’d pressured their jailhouse witness to deliver a confession tale they knew to be false.

Lastly, DuBoise’s lawyers accused the Tampa Police Department of fostering policies in those years — official and unwritten — that led to badly trained officers violating DuBoise’s constitutional rights.

The retired detectives and the dentist all disputed in court that there was any evidence to support the claims.

“I’m just telling you, that whole lawsuit is accusing us of things that are not a word of truth,” Burke said by phone, “and I have no other comment.”

The money wasn’t all about money . What he’d lost was clearly priceless. But DuBoise wanted recognition from the state that his life had value. And through the lawsuit, he wanted to show how a poor kid who didn’t even know enough to ask for a lawyer could get railroaded.

DuBoise attended mediations in the lawsuit, where dollar figures were negotiated and he felt like the defendants were trying to avoid admitting their mistakes. Settling the suit could mean a faster payday, but he hoped for a more public trial.

“So people know,” he said. “So that it doesn’t happen again.”

REOPENING GRAMS

In 2020, new detectives went searching for Barbara Grams’ true killers with a leg up on their predecessors: DNA implicating convicted killers Abron Scott and Amos Robinson.

Further testing of Grams’ rape kit had shown that not only was Robinson’s DNA present — Scott’s was, too.

Yet as they interviewed more than a dozen people, detectives seemed reluctant to move past the idea of DuBoise’s guilt. They often left interviewees with the impression that’s who they were after, even still.

“(DuBoise) got out,” state investigator Chuck Massucci said while interrogating an old friend of DuBoise’s, Ray Garcia. “I don’t know how to say it nicely, other than bullshit.”

Cops in the 1980s had theorized that DuBoise, Garcia and DuBoise’s brother, Victor, killed Grams. The other men were never prosecuted.

Massucci showed Garcia a photo of the mark on Grams’ cheek. “I’m all about reasonable doubt,” he said. “But that’s his fucking teeth mark.”

Every now and then, detectives would grasp a scrap of intrigue, like a mall worker who remembered a man talking to Grams the last night she saw her. Forty years on, the coworker believed it was DuBoise, though this was the first she’d mentioned it.

Mostly, though, their old theory led to dead ends.

The investigators interviewed Victor DuBoise at an Alabama jail shortly before he went to prison in an unrelated manslaughter case. In his youth, Victor had been deemed intellectually disabled. He answered slowly as the cops prodded him fruitlessly about the Grams killing, and others, seemingly struggling to understand.

When investigators met with Robinson, they pressed for connections between him and DuBoise, again getting nothing.

It could be easy to write off the cops’ doubts as a reluctance to concede their predecessors’ mistakes, but there could be consequences. A defense lawyer might seize on their skepticism to undermine the cases against Robinson and Scott.

Meanwhile, in the light of the present day, the evidence used against DuBoise in the 1980s looked ever weaker.

“Today, I would never say what I said 37 years ago,” Richard Souviron, the dentist who’d matched DuBoise’s teeth, told the Times after DuBoise’s exoneration. Though he still wouldn’t rule DuBoise out, “There could have been a million other people whose teeth fit.”

The science had been new at the time, he said, and he was wrong to make a definitive judgment. Within 10 years of the DuBoise case, he’d changed his thinking on matches. He no longer believes bite mark comparison is useful in identifying suspects, only in excluding them. It was painful, he said, to know he helped send an innocent man to prison.

However, the dentist flatly denies conspiring with the police or fabricating anything. He called those claims in DuBoise’s lawsuit “baloney.”

The gas station clerk who’d pointed detectives toward DuBoise said she never meant to suggest the teenage troublemaker might be a murderer. “Tell him I’m sorry,” she said.

Joanne “Josie” Suarez, the woman who’d led DuBoise to his arrest, moved far from Tampa, married and raised a family — a world apart from that “very low point in my life” in the ‘80s when she’d been “on heavy, heavy drugs” to cope with the scars of a near-fatal crash. Though she’d testified differently, she insisted now that the ring police showed her — the one they said was missing from Grams’ finger — was not the same one she’d once seen DuBoise wearing.

“If he really didn’t do it,” she said, “it’s terrible what happened to him.”

And then there was Claude Butler, the jailhouse witness. He’d stuck to his story for decades, but in 2022 Butler told DuBoise’s civil lawyers he was ready to unburden himself.

He said he’d lied.

Butler felt “squeezed from both sides” in 1984 when two detectives visited him as he awaited trial for kidnapping and robbery. He was 21 and facing life. The detectives told him how DuBoise committed the crime, he said, and offered help.

So Butler cozied up to DuBoise by offering him pills, he said, and cigarettes lit off electrical outlets. He waited for DuBoise to admit his crime, but DuBoise said nothing.

“Other than he wasn’t guilty,” Butler said. “You’d hear him saying that all the time.”

When Butler got cold feet about testifying, he said prosecutor Mark Ober promised to get him released if he went through with it, which Ober vehemently denies, saying Butler’s small-time charges virtually guaranteed an early release.

“Have I always felt bad about it? Yes,” Butler said. “I had to pick the worst of two evils.”

A CONFESSION

After more than two years of prodding at the Grams case, investigators caught a break: a confession.

Abron Scott’s family urged him to say what he knew, so last year he laid it all out.

Scott was 58 now, graying, and wore glasses. But he remembered 1983.

He told investigators he’d seen Grams on North Boulevard. He and Robinson were alone, walking back from Robinson’s brother’s house.

“And Amos say, ‘Look at that bitch … I want to get her,’” Scott said. “He grabbed her arm.”

Robinson raped Grams behind the dentist’s office, he said, while Scott went around the side of the building and smoked a joint.

He said he heard a noise — “pap, pap, pap,” — and watched Robinson beat her with a board, “So the bitch won’t get up and run and tell.”

His guilty plea in both the Grams and Lansen murders would eventually buy him a deal: Prosecutors wouldn’t seek the death penalty. And he’d testify against his old friend, who awaits trial.

Scott told investigators he remembered driving Lansen, the photographer, out to a wooded area where the road dead-ended, near where he’d gone to elementary school, and looking on as Robinson shot her at close range.

As for Herminia Castro, Scott denied involvement, but he claimed Robinson had bragged about raping and killing her, then setting her car on fire.

“He had a hate,” Scott said of Robinson. “It was like he enjoyed doing what he was doing.”

Investigators pressed him on the unsolved case of a man hit with a hammer in a December 1982 robbery blocks from Robinson’s workplace. Before the victim died, he’d described two assailants. Scott said he didn’t remember such a thing, though he and Robinson did rob people.

Scott hadn’t known Grams was dead, he said, until months afterward, when Robinson told him he’d read in the paper that police arrested someone else. Robinson thought it was funny.

“It didn’t faze him,” Scott said. “I mean, he was happy. Bragged about what he did. And he was happy that they got the wrong dude.”

LIFE AFTER THE MONEY

In the summer of 2023, DuBoise became a millionaire — the Florida Legislature had voted to pay him the $1.85 million he was owed — but he stayed in the little shack at the Sunny Center, feeding the cats and possums on his doorstep. He drywalled the country club building where the golf carts were stored, never considering playing nine holes himself.

If he wasn’t working maintenance at the club, he was fixing something at one of Wheeler’s properties, doing free renovations at the Sunny Center or making repairs at a friend or family member’s place.

He drove one neighbor’s kids to school, shopped for another who was elderly and checked in on the guy next door with COVID. He drove to Jacksonville to testify as a character witness when a man he knew from prison was up for resentencing.

Any perceived injustice makes him restless. When an acquaintance mentioned her movers were gouging her on fees, he drove her rental truck to Michigan himself. When he met a woman in a Clearwater parking lot who’d been towed despite paying, he waited for hours to record the tow truck doing it again.

The idea of relaxation almost confused him. “I just don’t really care to do that,” he said. People invited him to do things for fun, like take a boat ride on the bay, but he declined. A nice restaurant meal? “I tried it, but once was really enough.”

He checked up on his mother, for whom it seemed he was always making appointments or sending an Uber Eats order. He talked to her physical therapists and installed a camera so he and his sister could see if she needed something. She’d told the parole board she needed his help years ago. He could finally be there.

His demeanor remained, typically, Zen-like. He’d become practiced at telling his story with gravity — the shock of arrest, surreality of trial and horror of death row. How he’d focused on work and wrote his letters until someone listened. How could he be anything but grateful?

He’d been asked the same questions so many times, he hardly seemed to think about the answers, unless he was asked something new, like, “What moment in your life would you relive, if you could, to change it?”

DuBoise leaned back on his love seat and thought.

When he was 17, he said, he’d had a 19-year-old girlfriend. They spent whole days watching black-and-white Bogie and Bacall movies. One day they were supposed to hang out, but he wanted to work on a mullet boat. She told him, “If you leave, that’s it.” He didn’t believe her, so he went fishing. But she’d meant it.

Or maybe he’d relive the day he tried to join the Army. They told him to come back when he turned 18, but he could have joined with his parents’ signature. He could have been shipped far, far away.

“Maybe,” he said. “But it don’t bother me.”

One friend attributed the way DuBoise lives to his Christianity. “He doesn’t talk about it much,” said Rick Bishop, a coworker at the country club who also served time with DuBoise, “but he walks it.”

Some friends and family wondered whether he’d fully processed his experiences. He was, said one former Innocence Project employee, thriving more than most. One 2022 study showed more than half of exonerees exhibit signs of post-traumatic stress disorder.

Asked if he’d ever talked to a therapist, Duboise responded, “What happened, happened.”

He wanted a partner who’d make a good mother, he said, but he had not dated in his three years free. “I can’t even think about that yet.”

The things that brought DuBoise satisfaction were ordinary — finishing a job, taking a drive, feeding the cats, helping his mom. All he ever wanted was a normal life.

He still woke before sunrise on full alert. He could still tick off the names of every guy on his wing of death row. In his mostly empty refrigerator sat the cheese that still constituted most of his meals, still eaten alone in a safe space. He’d upgraded, slightly, from the processed American singles of prison to Member’s Mark natural cheddar.

THE PROSECUTORS

When Mark Ober won the trial that sent DuBoise to prison, police gave him a set of plaster teeth left over from the investigation. He kept it on his desk for decades, even after he was elected state attorney.

If he still ran things, Ober would not have freed DuBoise just because someone else’s DNA was found on the murder victim. Yes, Ober told the Times, he knows bite mark evidence is now “controversial.” He downplayed the science but stressed that it remains admissible in all 50 states. Yes, he knew the jailhouse informant had recanted, but only after DuBoise’s lawyers “got to him.” Yes, in his time as a defense lawyer, he’d seen people he believed were innocent go to prison. But not in this case.

Ober had taken DuBoise’s exoneration personally, partly because Andrew Warren, the outsider who’d upset Ober in the 2016 election, had led the way.

“I’ve had an honorable career,” Ober said last year in DuBoise’s lawsuit. He felt Warren had questioned his integrity via DuBoise’s exoneration — particularly offensive since Warren, who Ober likes to say has never tried a case in state court, “couldn’t try his way out of a paper bag.”

Ober believes in the system of appeals. In his mind, Warren created the conviction review unit, a flashy way to sidestep all that procedure, to get votes. If new evidence had emerged in the DuBoise case, he said, DuBoise’s lawyer could have simply pushed for a new trial.

But DuBoise says the evidence would have never been discovered without the conviction review unit cutting through the red tape. That he’d lost decades of his life just trying to find a lawyer. That he’d begged for DNA testing all the way back in 2008.

“He has no clue about real life,” DuBoise said of Ober. “He just thinks about courtrooms.”

What if Ober had to mount a new case against DuBoise today? With his best evidence tossed out, he might drop the charges, he said — but not necessarily. “It’d be razor-thin,” Ober said, but he could still make a case for DuBoise’s guilt.

Whatever fueled Ober’s comments, whether high-minded philosophies on the law or resentment for a political foe, it’s clear that local politics influence an innocent person’s chances of going free.

Warren had hoped the conviction review unit would thrive through greater cooperation with police, but his progressive ambitions turned off much of the Tampa criminal justice establishment.

Brian Dugan, Tampa’s police chief at the time, said he was skeptical of DuBoise’s innocence simply because of Warren’s involvement. “If that guy cured cancer,” Dugan said of Warren, “I’d be like, ‘You’re gonna have to prove it to me.’”

If Warren’s rise felt like it came out of the blue, it ended even more abruptly. On the morning of Aug. 4, 2022, as Warren watched a grand jury indict the alleged true killers in the Grams case, he got an email: You’ve been suspended.

Gov. Ron DeSantis had yanked Warren from office, citing his statements in support of abortion seekers and transgender people, as well as his reluctance to prosecute certain nonviolent crimes. Though a deputy escorted Warren from the building, he still went on TV later to announce the murder charges — the press conference DuBoise had seen at the truck stop.

In Warren’s place, DeSantis appointed political ally Suzy Lopez, another prosecutor who has raised doubts about DuBoise’s innocence. She recently approached a Times reporter in a courthouse hallway and suggested the presence of Robinson’s DNA didn’t mean DuBoise wasn’t also at the murder scene. She quipped, “You should ask the (Tampa Police Department) what they think of the DuBoise case.”

Asked if the state attorney’s office stands behind DuBoise’s exoneration, a spokesperson said Lopez believes in thorough conviction reviews but felt her predecessor’s handling of the DuBoise case fell short. She criticized Warren for not personally speaking to the prosecutor or detectives from 1983.

DuBoise shudders now when he thinks about how small the window was for his release.

THE STATE OF CONVICTION REVIEWS

The state attorney’s conviction review unit has gotten less of a spotlight since Lopez took over.

The unit has not alerted the media when its investigations have led to a rare prisoner release. The reasons are unclear, though past news coverage has prompted waves of prisoners to seek reviews.

“Our focus is seeking justice,” said a state attorney’s spokesperson, “not creating headlines.”

Few, then, heard about Cornelius Marion, who walked free in 2023 after serving 33 years for a Tampa robbery. His attorney highlighted procedural flaws in the police investigation, particularly in a photo lineup shown to the only witness. The state attorney’s office agreed to release Marion with time served but would not overturn his conviction. He remains a felon, ineligible for money from the state.

Two other prisoners have been freed under Lopez, both with time served.

Seth Miller, a lawyer and executive director of the Innocence Project of Florida, said cooperation between their lawyers and the state attorney’s office “tapered off” after Warren’s removal. He stressed that he wants to work with Lopez.

“Under whatever leadership is there now, we don’t have any collaborations,” Miller said.

That’s not true, said a spokesperson for the state attorney’s office. The Innocence Project cut off communication in 2023, she said, upset over the outcome of a state attorney’s investigation into one of their clients.

Teresa Hall, who led conviction reviews during DuBoise’s exoneration, left the office last summer, after leaders said she was dishonest about a vacation taken while on paid medical leave. Asked about the state attorney’s suggestion that the DuBoise case wasn’t thoroughly re-investigated, Hall said, “I proudly stand by the work I did for the state attorney’s office.”

Her replacement left in February, and the office is again interviewing candidates. A spokesperson said a senior attorney is reviewing innocence cases in the interim.

In the meantime, the panel of former judges tasked with helping review cases has been disbanded, with plans for the new leader to refill the panel.

Lopez declined an interview with the Times. A spokesperson said conviction reviews remain a small but important part of her office’s work and that their procedures have not changed under Lopez.

“No one should be incarcerated for a crime they did not commit,” Lopez said in a written statement. “When our office learned of new information that eroded confidence in three previous convictions, we did the right thing and released them from prison.”

DuBoise still brings cookies to the State Attorney’s Office each year around Christmas.

He worries about the fate of the conviction review unit, about innocent people stuck in the bowels of the system, desperate for “that little flicker of light.”

FINDING HOME

In January, DuBoise finally got to put a dollar value on 37 lost years: $14 million.

When the Tampa City Council approved the settlement of his lawsuit, each member spoke dramatically of DuBoise’s tragedy. The city, the police and the dentist conceded no wrongdoing. Mayor Jane Castor, who previously served as the city’s top cop, said Tampa police have advanced “light years” in technology and training from the time of DuBoise’s arrest in the 1980s and that she hoped the settlement helped in his healing.

Though not the trial he’d imagined, it was a moment of public recognition. But DuBoise wasn’t there. He was driving east on Interstate 4, having promised to deliver a wheelchair lift to a friend flying into Orlando for a medical visit.

Soon after, he paid cash for a house in South Tampa: four bedrooms, a three-car garage and a heated pool that cost just under $1 million. He arrived on the day of the home inspection, smiling a little more than usual.

The seller, a talkative firefighter, reclined on his remaining furniture and pointed out to DuBoise the zany comedy he was watching in which Will Ferrell is wrongly sentenced to 10 years in prison and hires Kevin Hart to toughen him up. DuBoise glanced at the screen and turned away.

The seller ribbed DuBoise that his soon-to-be neighbor had inquired about whether DuBoise was good-looking. Then he tried to show DuBoise a photo of a woman he’d dated. DuBoise ignored all of that, politely, and talked about some light fixtures he planned to switch out.

Yes, he’d be moving in by himself, DuBoise told the man. Yeah, maybe he’d get a dog, but he had bigger thoughts about filling the home. No, he said, he wasn’t worried about meeting a woman. Yes, he politely answered, prison food was bad.

DuBoise walked off, down a hallway and into one of the bedrooms, where he stood looking.

“A boy and a girl, maybe,” he said, “like siblings who were going to get split up. I could adopt them and keep them together.”

DuBoise was free to pursue his life as he wanted for what remained of it. In that moment, he chose to live with hope. DuBoise, months shy of 60, felt like it was all beginning.

He’d still go to work, but maybe take on less, coming home to jump in that pool. He’d learn to prepare more than cheese sandwiches in his big kitchen with the island, because he’d have to provide for more than himself. It’d be a normal life. He’d never expected more.

The Marked Man is based on more than a year of research and reporting by Tampa Bay Times staff writers Christopher Spata and Dan Sullivan. The reporters reviewed over 11,000 pages of documents and spoke with more than 50 people, including 25 hours of interviews with Robert DuBoise.

The Times reviewed DuBoise’s 1985 trial transcript and myriad other court, prison and parole commission records. Reporters reviewed the Innocence Project’s petition to the Hillsborough State Attorney’s Office conviction review unit and the findings of that office’s investigation by attorney Teresa Hall, as well as reports documenting the DNA testing. Additional details came from testimony in DuBoise’s federal lawsuit against the city of Tampa.

To chronicle the murders of 1983 and the ongoing prosecutions, the Times reviewed investigative reports by Tampa Police and sheriff’s offices in Hillsborough and Pinellas counties, along with public records from the Hillsborough State Attorney’s Office.

Details about Robinson and Scott’s personal histories came from various records and transcripts from the Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office and county clerk of court, the Florida Archives, the state Department of Corrections and courts in Escambia and Washington counties.

To find details and verify recollections about events and places from the 1970s, ‘80s and ‘90s, the reporters drew from archives of the Tampa Tribune, St. Petersburg Times, Palm Beach Post, Florida Today, Fox 13 Tampa Bay and the Charleston Evening and Columbia Record newspapers in South Carolina. Other information came from the NFL Network, lawyers and a former Florida prison warden.

About the reporters

Christopher spata.

is an enterprise reporter covering Florida culture. Read more.

Dan Sullivan

is a criminal justice reporter. Read more.

Additional credits

PHOTOGRAPHERS: Jefferee Woo, Martha Asencio-Rhine, Ivy Ceballo

PHOTO EDITOR: Martha Asencio-Rhine

ILLUSTRATIONS: Sean Kristoff-Jones

ANIMATIONS: Aya Diab

PRINT DESIGN: Sean Kristoff-Jones, Beth McCoy

DIGITAL DESIGN: Justinian Hatfield, Jason Katzwinkel, Sean Kristoff-Jones

COPY EDITOR: Amy Gehrt

ENGAGEMENT: Alexandra Urban, Neha Seenarine, Aya Diab, Hannah Farrow, Meaghan Habuda, Jenna Duncan

EDITORS: Claire McNeill, Mark Katches, Chris Tisch, Carolyn Fox

PROJECT MANAGER: Claire McNeill

Christopher Spata is an enterprise reporter covering Floridians and culture. He can be reached at [email protected].

Dan Sullivan is a criminal justice reporter. Reach him at [email protected].

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